celticgenes

Good morning, All,

I've been here on & off for a few years. Just like my hope for normalcy with ex-alcoholic ex-fiance. I have finally stopped trying to fit the square peg into the round hole, but sometimes it's sad to do the right thing.

Especially when the X acts normally. Ultimately, that's what I wish for him, and I know that a few moments of calm do not a relationship make, but it's HARDER to commit to staying away when he does the right thing momentarily.

I am entangled in a property issue that requires me to have some contact with him, which of course he uses to open the door to whining, accusing, abusive texts, emails, voicemails, etc.

There is no hope for any continued relationship, I don't even want there to be hope, but I am in mourning for the 20 years I spent hoping for reasonably happy ever after. Also sad that I exposed my kids (not his) to the instability of life with a substance abuser.

Just sad this am, and somewhat lonely. I do have good friends providing great support, and all of you here, but I miss picking the phone up to discuss my day with him.

LifeRecovery

ONe of the hardest parts for me was mourning the "potential" of the relationship, of the person without substance use/abuse.

Be gentle with yourself and hugs.