Marytherboo

Just an update, AH left me a voicemail late last night saying he's back at the psych hospital. More cash out of my pocket, is all I could think, how hateful is that? I don't know if I'll be able to go wholly NC since we still have papers to sign for the separation, but he's done a really good job of convincing me that NC the only way to preserve my sanity. I could not be making this stand without you folks. Two months ago I was still enmeshed and totally sucked in. Now freedom, terrifying and new though it is, is actually on the horizon. What a change...

naive

it's not hateful, mary. he's already bled you dry and you want off of his ride.

why is he in the psych hospital? did he check himself in?

Marytherboo

I don't know the whole story, but I'm guessing he showed up at the ER after overdosing and told them he was still suicidal, at which point they admitted him, possibly involuntarily.

Cyranoak

I've been down this road many times. You know what you did wrong and how to handle it better in a few ways-- dont' beat yourself up.

I got tired of this with my wife so I told her that the next time she threatened suicide I would call the police. I did, they took her to the hospital where she was forced to stay until she detoxed, and then the sent her a bill for $1,000. The ambulance was expensive too. In my case, she never did it again because it turned out she was bluffing the whole time.

Of course, sometimes they aren't bluffing, but I would have never known if I hadn't set a boundary and then enforced it.

Take care,

Cyranoak

Marytherboo

I've called the police on many of these, and the only bad side is that I get stuck with the $500 or more bill. This time I'm not speaking to him during his hospital stay and I feel so much less anxious. Even if he runs up more bills (he's on my insurance til the separation is final), it's better than having him here.

Carol Star

4 m's- mothering, manipulating, martyrdom, managing......I think the threat is a manipulation.....