vujade

I didn't go in to this because it is so freaking messy but I am in a band...and RA is part of it. Actually RA brought me into the band about 9 months ago (before we were "we"). I. Love. It. After years of living with XAH and not doing what I love (singing) I am just in love with my music again. One of the reasons I have been putting up with RA's behavior is that I didn't want to lose this band and was afraid if he wasn't doing it, it would cease to be.

Well, last night was prax night (yeah...that No Contact thing was kind of doomed). He called me and said that he wasn't feeling well and would have to cancel prax (QUACK). I told him that we weren't canceling and that if he didn't go, he was going to be fired from the band. He said oh well. I said "Then consider it done."

I went to prax last night and sheepishly said "I may have made an executive decision on behalf of the band" and told them what I had done. They actually THANKED me. They said that if I hadn't have done it, they would have had to discuss it without me to decide what to do and how to handle it with me (would I be mad...would I leave) because they were tired of being held hostage by his alcoholism. So now we have to find a replacement for him but we are still moving forward.

Ooooooh...this is getting easier by the day.

There is a song I sing with my band called Fighter by Christina Aguilera:

'Cause if it wasn't for all that you tried to do
I wouldn't know just how capable I am to pull through
So I wanna say thank you
'Cause it makes me that much stronger
Makes me work a little bit harder
Makes me that much wiser
So thanks for making me a fighter.

Felt SOOOOOOO good to sing that last night.

Thanks, everyone, for letting me work through this. I'm embarrassed that I let myself get attached to yet another A but compared to the 13 years I went through before, I think I'm learning a little faster. Maybe the universe was just giving me a little test. LOL

LexieCat

Wow.

All I can say is, wow.

You just freed a bunch of slaves.

Buffalo66

Yay! I am also a musician and singer!
The best part of this post for me is how the rest of the band validated your action. An action that you took for yourself, but the icing is that they feel better now, too!

Singing is powerful

tallulah

Yaay you!

(I've always wanted to use that smilie.. totally nothing to do with the props unless you think of it like you've ridden in to free your bandmates.. lol)

fourmaggie

that is an awesome QUOTE!!

24Years

Have you sang Carrie Underwood's, Lesson's Learned...I'm thinking you might relate to those lyrics as well:

There's some things that I regret,
Some words I wish had gone unsaid,
Some starts,
That had some bitter endings,
Been some bad times I've been through,
Damage I cannot undo,
Some things,
I wish I could do all all over again,
But it don't really matter,
Life gets that much harder,
It makes you that much stronger,
Oh, some pages turned,
Some bridges burned,
But there were,
Lessons learned.

[Chorus:]
And every tear that had to fall from my eyes,
Everyday I wondered how I'd get through the night,
Every change, life has thrown me,
I'm thankful, for every break in my heart,
I'm grateful, for every scar,
Some pages turned,
Some bridges burned,
But there were lessons learned.

There's mistakes that I have made,
Some chances I just threw away,
Some roads,
I never should've taken,
Been some signs I didn't see,
Hearts that I hurt needlessly,
Some wounds,
That I wish I could have one more chance to mend,
But it don't make no difference,
The past can't be rewritten,
You get the life you're given,
Oh, some pages turned,
Some bridges burned,
But there were,
Lessons learned.

I love this upbeat song!