crystal226

STBXAH said something about how he didn't want to fight me on money when it came to the tax return and how we use it because he didn't want me resenting him more or hating him. I realized something though...I don't hate him and honestly I don't even resent him. Sometimes I wish I did because it would make it easier, but I am over those feelings. Thinking about that today I came up with this poem while I was cleaning...thought I would share.

I didn’t leave because I hate you
I wish that you could see
I left not to hurt for you
I left to take care of me
I love you through thick and thin
But things for me got too tough
My leaving had nothing to do with love
It’s was just my time to say enough
Enough of the pain of giving
To someone one who hated themselves
Enough of the task of living
A life that held no reward
I hope someday you will forgive me
And understand my ways
I hope someday I will truly let go of the time when I was we

seekingcalm

crystal, that was lovely...

Thank you, I so very much understand what you are saying.

StarCat

...thank you so much for posting that. It really is lovely, and it says a lot of the things that have been rattling around in my brain that I was having difficulty putting into words.

This part especially:
Enough of the pain of giving
To someone who hated themselves

yorkiegirl

Crystal, that is beautiful. I cried & cried reading it. Thank you.

Carol Star

Yep.......exactly.......I don't remember from where I remember this......"I rock you close as the memory grows cold.....I rock you close as the memory grows old." I just rock him from a distance.

CatLover1234

Your poem really touched my heart and expressed the thoughts I've had with my ex A but couldn't never find the words to say. Thank you for sharing!