loner1968

I signed up for anger management classes.Yes.....Its true. They are free so there's that but, honestly, I'm afraid because my anger is my armor. I feel like it could be like the bottle for an A. It runs my life, it "protects" me. It "helps" me accomplish tasks. It separates me from the rest of he world. Its MINE!!!!!

I don't know if I want to get rid of it. I do but I don't. It's not healthy but I can't let go of it. It has a hold on me and makes me think it is "good" but it really isn't. It causes me physical and mental pain. See the confusion? I'd like to know what the big deal is. Why am I so torn over this?

Any thoughts or advice? I promise I won't get MAD at you!

Ago

If I get angry at someone, they have power over me, when I forgive them, I am able to let go.

If I am angry with someone I take them to bed every night, wake up with them every morning, makes for a crowded bed, and that made me ask myself "Why am I "sleeping" with people I hate, that's counterproductive"

Having a resentment is like drinking poison and hoping they die.

funny but true

It is truly useless unless my anger empowers me to set a boundary or say no, other then that it's harmful to me, and quite frankly, to the precise extent am I angry do I squander the hours that are worthwhile.

Life is too long to be a crankybutt.

Freedom1990

I can definitely identify with the anger being a shield. I have enough health issues as it is, and holding on to anger just exacerbated those health issues. As with any of my character defects, I had to get sick and tired of holding on to it before I let go.

AllCheese

I too, am going through HUGE anger issues right now (had a devastating break-up w/an XABF). I've never had homicidal fantasies before; now I catch myself wondering what the sound of an ax smashing into his face would look/sound like. Crazy, huh??? It's the sort of thing that kind of sneaks up on me. In the New Year, I've made a resolution to crawl out of my shell and start attending Al-Anon (as well as staying here). Good luck to you!

TakingCharge999

Hey Kalizmidan!! stop copying my life!!

loner1968

The problem I have is that I don't have any idea how to let it go. I just don't understand the concept. That is why I'm taking the classes. I don't know what to expect.

Barbara52

Taking the classes is a great start loner. Perhaps individual counselling too? I found therapy to be very helpful.

genrs123

thats inspiring, ive always wanted to take some. i think it will be interesting regardless. where do you find out about these classes?

brundle

I took anger classes...I go to therapy too... I'm told now it's not anger, it's rage... I was told it's because I still live with AH and nothing gets resolved. I also don't yell or scream. I don't say much, just stuff it. I'm drinking that resentment poison hoping he will die. I dream of it.

My therapist told me that I most likely need actual distance (like leaving) to work on some of my anger (now rage) issues. I pay lots of money for this, but I'll happily give it to you for free.

She's right. You can't have some one who keeps hurting you again and again; and think that eventually the anger isn't going to build. I am really good at letting lots of things go, but after years of this, it I guess got to be to much...

Good Luck...