neutronstar

Hi all. This is my first post. Just needing other perspectives.
My partner of 5+ years has been battling alcoholism throughout our relationship. For the last year we have hit some all time lows with this battle and have nearly parted ways because how the addiction had been destroying our relationship. But just recently my partner had a "spiritual revelation" and was able to reevaluate life including job, family. I really felt that the addiction could be overcome this time. They were able to remain 100% sober for several weeks and deal with triggers that ordinarily would cause them to drink. Just yesterday a situation occurred regarding the uncertainty of changing careers and they were unable to handle it. Today they have been drinking again as it was another difficult day because of the day before and things that happened today.

My question is how do you stay supportive in times like these when there is such a glimmer of hope and your partner with alcoholism is trying harder and has been more successful than they ever have and is even seeking help spiritually to overcome this for themselves and for our relationship?

hope2bhappy

Unfortunately, this is a battle to be fought by a one-man army... the alcoholic. The only thing we can do is focus on ourselves and try to change our own behaviors and how we react to this person. How we react can often hinder their sobriety. I found that learning about detachment and enabling was very helpful. Once we are able to detach, we are being indirectly supportive. There is nothing we need to say to the A... there is nothing we need to do for him/her... we just need to focus on ourselves, and what we need. I think all of this will begin to make more sense to you after you read the stickies at the top of the cover page, as well as some of the posts on this forum.

Welcome to the group. We are glad you are here.:ghug2