Let me elaborate
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: In Limbo
Posts: 24
Let me elaborate
I just read LaTeeDa's post "people change"....
I just had to start another thread........I loved that thread. I have been looking for this and did not know what I was looking for!!!
My AH constantly says, "I want the woman I married"........I tell him PEOPLE CHANGE. I am 10 years older. My attitude has changed. My taste has changed. My body has changed.
He says if he can't have the woman he married it will never work............Well let me tell you guys if he were the man I married I would not be on this forum right now!!!!
Common sense tells us that people change and change is normal.
I just had to start another thread........I loved that thread. I have been looking for this and did not know what I was looking for!!!
My AH constantly says, "I want the woman I married"........I tell him PEOPLE CHANGE. I am 10 years older. My attitude has changed. My taste has changed. My body has changed.
He says if he can't have the woman he married it will never work............Well let me tell you guys if he were the man I married I would not be on this forum right now!!!!
Common sense tells us that people change and change is normal.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: London, England
Posts: 21
Hmm, that's very strange and familiar. My AP is often telling me "I want the girl I fell in love with, you've changed, you're hard and detached."
I feel like screaming - "Of course I have changed, I'm a different person, I have to be detached, you're drunk 5 nights out of seven, I have to live my life on my own terms and be independent (detached?). I can't be the person you want me to be cos I've been disappointed too many times by looking forward to seeing you and then you coming home drunk 4 hours later than I expected you to."
Generally I don't say this though. I don't understand why he keeps saying this to me, can he not see that the situation is completely different? I don't feel like I'm that different a person; only different with him.... I feel sad too cos I don't want to be detached, but it's the only way really
I feel like screaming - "Of course I have changed, I'm a different person, I have to be detached, you're drunk 5 nights out of seven, I have to live my life on my own terms and be independent (detached?). I can't be the person you want me to be cos I've been disappointed too many times by looking forward to seeing you and then you coming home drunk 4 hours later than I expected you to."
Generally I don't say this though. I don't understand why he keeps saying this to me, can he not see that the situation is completely different? I don't feel like I'm that different a person; only different with him.... I feel sad too cos I don't want to be detached, but it's the only way really
Member
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 477
My AP is often telling me "I want the girl I fell in love with, you've changed, you're hard and detached."
I am, in XABF's eyes, hard, detached, cold, cruel, self-centered and a biAtch. He now claims to understand why my marriage fell apart. Says that the reason I no longer want him is because I have had too much stress in my life (he might just have a point!) and that's why I am now having affairs and cheating on him. So logical!
Personally, I think I have changed for the better....new attitudes create new resolve, you stop to think whether you need something or not in your life and it becomes easier to stop the drama.
I wish I could share this forum with him and that he would read the posts by recovering As on the Aism board. Changes would benefit him too!
ARL
I am, in XABF's eyes, hard, detached, cold, cruel, self-centered and a biAtch. He now claims to understand why my marriage fell apart. Says that the reason I no longer want him is because I have had too much stress in my life (he might just have a point!) and that's why I am now having affairs and cheating on him. So logical!
Personally, I think I have changed for the better....new attitudes create new resolve, you stop to think whether you need something or not in your life and it becomes easier to stop the drama.
I wish I could share this forum with him and that he would read the posts by recovering As on the Aism board. Changes would benefit him too!
ARL
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