an'ka

My experience with non alcoholic stuff was two years ago, when after two months of non-drinking, AH and I went to Thanksgiving dinner and he had a glass of NA wine (wine was always his drug of choice). Next morning, there was an empty bottle of liquor under the couch, which he claimed was "old". I see no value in that stuff--it is the primary trigger for drinking IMHO, because you go through the same rituals, hold the same bottle, drinking pretty much the same liquid--if that doesn't make you want the real stuff, I don't know what will.

WantsOut

nocellphone, you made me laugh. Thanks

jimhere

Actually, that phrase is some of the mythology thrown around the FELLOWSHIP of AA that was brought in from treatment centers and eventually became part of the jargon.

Read Chapter 7 of the book Alcoholics Anonymous. Towards the end of the chapter, it directly addresses this subject . Then you'll see where I'm coming from.

I agree, in early recovery it is best to stay away from those situations, and to never drink NA beer at anytime in recovery. But I've recovered, so NA beer, or any form of alcoholic beverage doesn't tempt me. I don't think about drinking and I don't think about not drinking because the problem does not exist for me anymore.
Jim

DesertEyes

I am an alcoholic, but my disease has nothing to do with alcohol. Alcohol is just one of an infinite number of activities I can use to hide from the responsibilites of real life. What makes my life _healthy_ is that I abstain from the kind of denial-based _thinking_ that justifies my selfish behavior.

I have an alcoholic mind, and it takes very little for it to "slip" into the old patterns of denial and justification. When I first left my pill-head wife I was advised by many wise people in AA to abstain from relationships for 12 months. That would give me time to recover my balance, to re-asses my life and the direction I wanted it to take. A relationship would be a distraction from the more important matters I had to attend to.

About 6 months after leaving my ex a very charming red-head and I went out a few times. We both _knew_ a relationship would be bad for us at this time. So we agreed that we were "not-dating". We called each other on the phone, bought cards and gifts for each other, gave each other "pet names", laughed our heads off and cried our hearts out. And yes, we focused on our not-relationship instead of focusing on our recovery.

My alcoholic mind had found a new "addiction" with which to hide from the pain of my divorce. A new way to distract myself, to be in denial of reality, to avoid the responsibility of personal growth. I was in denial of the fact that I was in a relationship. Fortunately I have enough practice at this recovery thing that I was able to see the beginings of alcoholic thinking. I was fortunate enough to have good friends in recovery who gave me a few nudges in the right direction. I was fortunate that the relationship ended in a healthy manner and we are now very close friends.

I am an alcoholic, and I can get addicted to _anything_ that I can somehow justify as being something else. A not-relationship? sure, I can justify that. Reading Playboy for the articles? yup, that's easy to justify. Maybe I can go to the Las Vegas casinos for the excellent restaurants. And I can stay at the Hooters Hotel because the rooms are cheaper.

uh-huh. Sure.

I am an alcoholic. Give me an inch and I'll take the mile, the street, the town and the whole state. And I'll justify it every day of the week.

Give me non-alcoholic beer, and I'll go buy it a non-sexual strip joint, fire up some non-addictive marijuana and enjoy some victim-less crime.

Mike

MrHappy

I've been sober for 23 years and have often enjoyed a NA beer with no guilt nor repercussions. I enjoy the taste and it's healthy for you. The trace amounts of alcohol can also be found in many medicines and sugars as well. It's really unavoidable living a normal life and eating normal foods. But some people need to put down the "Kool Aid" and start thinking for themselves. You will drink when you have decided that you can drink, plain and simple. There is no magic sorcery that will drive you to the edge and compel one to drink or drug. It is really this very fear and anxiety which causes relapse. And if it doesn't it causes you to "strain a gnat and swallow a camel" in judgment which is as bad. You have to know your motives. If one was drinking 20 beers in a row to try to replicate a real beer then that is obviously an issue. Even drinking a six pack is probably questionable unless one wasn't just trying to get fat.

I would not suggest it for a newly sober person either but there is no rational to placing oneself in an utterly helpless and powerless frame of mind pertaining to ones choices if they have been sober a while. That's just childish and dogmatic.
To thine own self be true.
P.S.- The only good NA beers are German: Clausthauler, Becks, St. Pauli Girl
American stuff is just ****.

Pelican

Welcome to the SR family MrHappy!

I just want to point out that you have responded to an older thread from several years ago.

I hope you will take the time to start a new thread and introduce yourself.

Redheadsusie

Ah tried the non alcoholic route. Went back to the real thing

sparklinbluz

My A did that in the beginning for awhile but now he doesnt. To me it is like OK your not spending the money on booze anymore just buying Oduls at almost $6 a six pack.

barb dwyer

As a bartender I can confidently tell you that in the seven-ten years I was behind the bar - 100% of the people who drank 'near beer' as a substitute for beer and called that 'quitting' ...

went back to drinking within 6 months.

100%.

This isn't just like ... ten people.
This is from MAKING IT A POINT TO FOLLOW UP ON every single one...

closer to a hundred .... 100% went back to drinking.

Just sharing my own personal experience.

wicked

Wow, Barb.
That is amazing.
Sounds right though, if you are going to the barber's.....
I knew if I started with that, (oh yeah, as if I drank for the taste) it would be right back to the beginning.
After 20 years, I was done. So done.

suki44883

This subject gets kicked around here quite often. Everyone is different. Some people can have an NA beer and not crave the real thing. Others can't. If it causes cravings for the real thing, then don't mess with it. I have NA beer occasionally and have never wanted the real thing. I loved the taste of beer and some foods just don't go down as well with tea or water. It isn't a problem for me. If you think it might be a problem for you, then stay away from it. Like I said, everyone is different.

KittyP

My husband's psychologist, who is based at a community alcohol programme, says it's something they consider an absolute no-no and actively discourage it. It's too much of a psychological dangerzone. There might be a very small amount of RAs who can drink non-alcoholic beer/wine and not relapse, but for the vast majority it's still part of denial and means they aren't recovered or is too likely to trigger old behaviours.

Dooner

Hello friends, I'm an alcoholic and I'll be sober 4 months on Dec. 8th. Recently I've had a few non alcoholic beers due to the holidays. I personally don't have cravings for alcohol and haven't had any since my first week of sobriety, but we aren't all built the same.

Use good judgement with this stuff. It's not worth the embarrassment and grief of relapse if you don't think you can handle a n/a beer. The very thought of getting drunk scares the cr*p out of me so I don't really ever WANT to get drunk anymore.

But I really do like the taste of beer. Becks makes a n/a that is delicious, much better than O'doul's. Also Kaliber, made by Guinness/Harp, and Nordic, made by Molsen. I'm not saying I've drank all this last week, but over the 15 years of my drinking career I've tried a few.

I hope this helps. Stay strong and read your big book!

-Dooner

kingsley09

Everyone is going to be different. For me, I had to quit drinking or I was gonna lose my family. That was my bottom, and I have been sober for the last five and a half years and have changed my life and habits so much that drinking sounds boorish and such a waste.

That said, I will have a few NA's here and there..like maybe an average of a three cans a month over the year...if not less.

But I have no desire to return to my old ways as I know the outcome and know what I have to lose. I am thankful that my 'low point' was a choice for me, and not a court order or not death.

HOWEVER, I would not recommend this as a general practice for everyone. I drank hard for 18 years but never developed a physical dependence..never had the shakes when I quit drinking and I was probably an 8 or 9 beer a day person. I was very fortunate. I only had carbohydrate withdrawls as my body really craved the sugar.

The mental part was tougher, reshaping what I did for fun and later learning how much of a lie the alcohol was, and that the things I thought I did for fun were really just enabling me to drink more. Alcohol is quite the lie.

So NA beer is probably not for everyone.

kingsley09

I suspect this is true for a lot of people...so if you have doubts about how you might react, it's not worth it to risk your sobriety over drinking NA beer

MsMahon

My XAH drank Becks NA Beer one of the times he had "stopped" drinking.

I was really proud of him as he seemed to be managing better because of the Becks NA beer

However, one night I found that although he'd bought and "drank" 4 bottles of this NA beer, they were still in the fridge.

What he'd actually been doing is pretending to drink NA beer while he'd gone out to buy the real stuff.

I suppose it would work for some people, but in my experience it just fuelled his desire to get back to drinking.



xxxxxx