Signs of relapse
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Join Date: Mar 2016
Posts: 1
Signs of relapse
This is my first post so I'm not familiar with all of the lingo yet but here's my story:
I recently found out that my husband has been abusing prescription medication. He is prescribed 120 lortab 10's every month. One day he left his phone on the couch and something told me to look at it. I found a text to his mother asking for some lortabs. I confronted him with it and he opened up and told me that he is prescribed 4/daily but he often runs out about a week before his doctor appointment and gets them from his mom. His mom is now completely out of the picture so that's no longer an issue. He agreed that he had a problem so when he got his next prescription he gave them to me and I was giving him 2 a day so he could quit slowly. The other day I went to go count them and he had replaced them with Tylenol, like I wouldn't notice. He had found them and taken them all which means he took 120 in about 2.5 weeks. He admitted that knowing they were inside was just too tempting for him. We have 2 sons (5 years and 3 months) so I packed us up and we left. He was extremely upset and begged me for help. I told him I would give him ONE chance under the conditions: he tell his doctor he has an addiction, goes to weekly counseling, agrees to random drug test, gives me most of his check (so I know he isn't buying them), gives me permission to look at his phone whenever I want because I'll know if he deleted any text since I can see who he text/calls on our online bill, and agreed to give me 100% custody in the event of a failed drug test. He agreed to all of it and said he just wanted to stop completely because taking a couple is too tempting. He says he wants to do it this time and feels he can do this and the pills aren't worth losing us over. He showed me his hiding spot and gave me the couple he had left. He went through some pretty intense withdrawals and is finally doing better. He took a drug test and passed yesterday. I'm having a hard time because he was so high functioning while on them and even looking back, I can barely notice the signs. I have a B.S in Psychology with an emphasis on addiction so I feel completely blind sighted that I didn't recognize any signs. I'm so scared of losing him because I want my family together more than anything in this world but I refuse to tolerate the lies and addiction. I know I will know by the failed drug test but what other signs should I pay attention to this time? Any advice on supporting a husband and their recovery? And how do I not go insane with the constant anxiety of what if he is using again?
I recently found out that my husband has been abusing prescription medication. He is prescribed 120 lortab 10's every month. One day he left his phone on the couch and something told me to look at it. I found a text to his mother asking for some lortabs. I confronted him with it and he opened up and told me that he is prescribed 4/daily but he often runs out about a week before his doctor appointment and gets them from his mom. His mom is now completely out of the picture so that's no longer an issue. He agreed that he had a problem so when he got his next prescription he gave them to me and I was giving him 2 a day so he could quit slowly. The other day I went to go count them and he had replaced them with Tylenol, like I wouldn't notice. He had found them and taken them all which means he took 120 in about 2.5 weeks. He admitted that knowing they were inside was just too tempting for him. We have 2 sons (5 years and 3 months) so I packed us up and we left. He was extremely upset and begged me for help. I told him I would give him ONE chance under the conditions: he tell his doctor he has an addiction, goes to weekly counseling, agrees to random drug test, gives me most of his check (so I know he isn't buying them), gives me permission to look at his phone whenever I want because I'll know if he deleted any text since I can see who he text/calls on our online bill, and agreed to give me 100% custody in the event of a failed drug test. He agreed to all of it and said he just wanted to stop completely because taking a couple is too tempting. He says he wants to do it this time and feels he can do this and the pills aren't worth losing us over. He showed me his hiding spot and gave me the couple he had left. He went through some pretty intense withdrawals and is finally doing better. He took a drug test and passed yesterday. I'm having a hard time because he was so high functioning while on them and even looking back, I can barely notice the signs. I have a B.S in Psychology with an emphasis on addiction so I feel completely blind sighted that I didn't recognize any signs. I'm so scared of losing him because I want my family together more than anything in this world but I refuse to tolerate the lies and addiction. I know I will know by the failed drug test but what other signs should I pay attention to this time? Any advice on supporting a husband and their recovery? And how do I not go insane with the constant anxiety of what if he is using again?
Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 5,103
One day he left his phone on the couch and something told me to look at it.
His actions not his words are what you need to pay attention to.
And what you see and hear is what you see and hear, don't allow his words to change that.
It takes time re-building trust - lots of time.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Mmmmmm
Posts: 3,178
Well long journey, you don't mess around! You figured it out and put down a boundary like an ace!
What kind of help is he getting to keep working in the right direction? An addiction specialist? Meetings?
What about you? Lots of wise people on SR. Glad you wrote!
What kind of help is he getting to keep working in the right direction? An addiction specialist? Meetings?
What about you? Lots of wise people on SR. Glad you wrote!
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