Grace

Another weekend of drunken abuse and criticism.

You've all been so kind with your words of wisdom and advice.

I'm going to make some phone calls today. I am looking for an open door. I'm tired of being his punching bag. Nothing is good enough. Nothing is right.
He fed the supper that I made him to the dogs.

Wish me luck!

Love you all!
Grace

equus

When there's no door - go borrow a jackhammer and knock the bloody wall down!!

Hopefully though as you look the small answers will add up and leave the bigger problems much easier to solve.

take care of you and stay safe.

rivercitybelle

((Grace))
I pray you find your open door today and have the courage to walk through it. Remember above all, keep you SAFE!

marriedithink

Good luck, it's out there.

pmaslan

Oh Grace, you do not deserve one more minute of his abuse.
I think that would be the last meal I ever cooked for him
if it were me.......good luck with the phone calls today.

Cynay

Soooo sorry you are going through this...

There are always open doors (choices) I hope it all lines up for you. I know when I was finally brought to my knees and gave it all up the doors were not only flung open, but everything happened SO quickly and without problems.

Take care of you and know you dont have to live like that

CatsTail

Grace go to a womens shelter.

There is disabilities.com.

You don't need this.

Ngaire

CatsTail

I find it hard to believe you aren't eligible for a pension and section 8 housing.

Ngaire

minnie

A door is open. Sometimes we're just looking at the wrong one.

I have learnt to make all things negotiable in my life if I want to achieve peace. Where I live, what car I drive, what job I do, what stores I shop in. Everything is potentially up for review. Only then can I free myself from attachment to things and focus on my mental wellbeing. So what if I don't own a home, don't have a partner, don't have all the fancy stuff that money can buy? Because I have peace of mind for the first time ever.

Good luck, Grace. And I hope you are only cooking for one from now on, regardless of whether you share a house with him or not.

Cynay

Ohhh that reminds me of a saying I heard once that I really like.

Sometimes we dont see the open door because we are too focused on the one that just closed.

Remember when one door closes another will open for you

CatsTail

I think one is open for you Grace, I think you just need to walk through it.

Grace,
You were brave enough to say no to conventional medicine and to go through Holistic cancer treatments so you are brave enough to walk away from this and claim your life.

Ngaire

Janitw

Gracie - you only have to be smarter than the can of beer ???? Go for it hun.

Grace

No luck yet! The guy that I need to talk to is out of the office until Thursday.

My A/bf came home last night and said that he didn't really let the dogs eat the supper. I don't know what to believe. He tries to make me think that I'm the crazy one. I know that abusers do that...try to put the blame on us for EVERYTHING. Even if there is an apology....it is very shallow, and is always followed with, "but, I wouldn't have done that if you hadn't......"
It's still always my fault.

I'm still working on it and praying a lot. If God can see me through cancer, I think I can get through anything. I pray that God will keep me and my dog safe. I truly believe that He will.

Ngaire - I have already applied for disability, but I have to wait for a hearing with Social Security. It may not be for several more months. I AM trying, but the system is soooo slow. Because I have already applied for disability, I cannot go out and look for work. I am getting some help from welfare until my case is heard, but it is very minimal. That is how I manage to help out financially while I'm here, but it's never enough. That is why I do the work around here. It IS his house, and I feel that I need to do the work in order to earn my keep. Yes, he is doing me a big favor by letting me live here. On the other hand, when I had MY house, he lived with me for 7 years. And during that 7 years, he didn't help out any more, financially, than I do now.

If I go to a women's shelter, what do I do with all my furniture and my little dog? I don't want to leave her here and I don't know what to do with all of my things. I'm not making excuses. I'm just being honest.

I'll keep in touch.
Thank you all again for your continued love and support.
Grace

reikihelps

Hi Grace,

If you call the women's shelter or Domestic Abuse they can help you make all these decisions. I know here in our town there are families that will take care of pets until women are settled and can have them back. Don't think through this alone. They can help a lot.
I send you a prayer -
reikihelps

CatsTail

Grace,
Ther eis no reason you should have to leave your things or your dog. Like reiki said call a womens shelter that is what they are there for to answer all the questions you have.

Pick up that 500 pound phone and reach out Grace.

Ngaire

reikihelps

Are you back yet, Grace? Let us know how you are.

inthisforkeeps

When you close one door, you make room for another door to open. I am in your same boat....but where there's a will, there *is* a way.

Much love to you (and I admire your strength!).