Weathering the Storm
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: North America
Posts: 362
Weathering the Storm
A close friend of mine recently told me that sometimes the best storms we have to get through in life are the ones we create for ourselves.
I knew instantly what he meant when he told me this, as I had been brewing my own storm for a few months now. When my X-A passed away in October little did I know I would come undone. I think this happened mainly because of the loss of him, but also bringing back alot of emotional baggage that I thought I had dropped. I became involved with someone who is unhealthy for me, as he has a drinking and drug problem as well. I have joined in on most occasions with him as far as the drinking goes. Not very proud to admit that. In looking for the Great Escape that drinking and drug abuse gives a person, I found that like all wonderful vacations you still have to go back home, come back to reality. I was starting not to care. That scared me. I do care, I care alot. I have a daughter to raise, yes by myself, but I can do it.
I'm not going to beat myself up, nor have a pity party. I still have work to do on me, but I will get it done. I have goals Im trying to reach.
So its back at square one, but its there where beautiful things start to happen.
I knew instantly what he meant when he told me this, as I had been brewing my own storm for a few months now. When my X-A passed away in October little did I know I would come undone. I think this happened mainly because of the loss of him, but also bringing back alot of emotional baggage that I thought I had dropped. I became involved with someone who is unhealthy for me, as he has a drinking and drug problem as well. I have joined in on most occasions with him as far as the drinking goes. Not very proud to admit that. In looking for the Great Escape that drinking and drug abuse gives a person, I found that like all wonderful vacations you still have to go back home, come back to reality. I was starting not to care. That scared me. I do care, I care alot. I have a daughter to raise, yes by myself, but I can do it.
I'm not going to beat myself up, nor have a pity party. I still have work to do on me, but I will get it done. I have goals Im trying to reach.
So its back at square one, but its there where beautiful things start to happen.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 4,955
Bonbon, it's not about the slipping and the falling.
It's about the getting up and giving it another shot.
As for those storms we create for ourselves, well...I think they become some of our best lessons.
Good to see you around.
It's about the getting up and giving it another shot.
As for those storms we create for ourselves, well...I think they become some of our best lessons.
Good to see you around.
1000 Post Club
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Recoveryville, USA
Posts: 1,297
I was starting not to care. That scared me
Your awareness about your indifference is the key to the solution. I find its impossible to act out on my indifference when I am aware of it. We just have to go thru the process of the feelings.
I went thru this lat week, didnt care about nothing, or at least I couldnt muster the energy to do anything caring for myself, but I knew I felt that way and didnt want to feel it.
Talked it out with others, realized I had a bad case of the "fuckets" (Read that another way and you;ll get the meaning).
As soon as I became aware, the feeling lifted.
Take care!
once in a . . .
Join Date: May 2004
Location: looking in / looking out
Posts: 1,214
So its back at square one, but its there where beautiful things start to happen.
Thank you bonbon!
Blessings,
Blue
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