angelgirl

Hi, I have been fighting off a panic attack all evening. I have been doing deep breathing, and it hasn't turned into a full blown attack yet, thank god, but I am really not feeling well. I am looking for some one who has suffered from them before, and understands. Right now, I can only handle hearing good things, that's how I get, GOSH, I just can't handle this!!!! Becky
I don't want to go to the ER, they fill you full of benzo's, and I can't take them now. I also have no one to call, so please don't suggest that. Thanks,

angelgirl

Best if you're out there I would really like to hear some spitirual help.... If you can?

best

The best thing I think of when I feel things are out of line...
I look at my own hands and then I think of how big God's hands are.
His are much bigger and He can handle what ever I send His way.

best

His word tells us... He is always with us and will never leave us.

Lean not on your own understanding, lean and rest in His arms.

Where I am weak, He is strong.

Lord fill Your Spirit of peace in Becky's life at this moment.
Give her the assurance that You are with her and have all things in control.
As she asks, fill her with Your strength and wisdom.

Thank You lord

angelgirl

Thank you best. I really need that now. I can not handle these on my own. I feel so terrible. Thank you for answering me so fast. I'm a mess, Please pray for me. I feel so silly breaking down on here, but I do need some help, Thanks, I will PRAY, please pray for me too. Love, Becky

best

Silly would be not reaching out when we find a need to.

Thank you for not being silly. It is wise to seek answers, not silly.

Know that prayers are there, even if I don't post right away.

mParnell

just keep typing, hopefully it will keep your busy and detour you from those nasty panic attacks. I suffered from them for years. I'm here if you need me.

angelgirl

Thanks Best, you just don't know how much I needed what you have to say right now. My father is a Christian, and very strong and knowledgable in his faith, and when I get to this point, I normally call him, because I need to hear that god is here for me, I need to know someone is,,,
I feel so alone when my anxiety gets so bad. Like no one really understands. I do know god understands, sometimes I need to hear it. My husband does not understand this. He just thinks I'm using, and that is why I am panicky, I have not used, not since I got clean over 9 weeks ago. But this is how I always got after using for some period of time. So since in my using all my lying about it, he automatically blames me for using. I do understand why he feels like he does, BUt right now, I don't want to be accused of anything, I want to talk to someone, and you came right to my mind. I had my crying fit, and I prayed, and your words help me MUCH. I thank you SO much... I am so happy you were here. I just needed what you had to say. Very grateful, thank you GOD. Thank you Best, Love, Becky

angelgirl

Thank you M. This has been the worst it has gotten since I got clean over 9 weeks ago. It makes me feel so ALONE. I begin to think I am dying, I'm sure you know that feeling if you have had them. I always feel much better when I talk and hear about GOD when I feel this bad. I like to talk and hear about god anyway, but these are times when I am REALLy in need... Thanks for understanding, Love, Becky

angelgirl

I really AM calming down. The panic had been rising in me all day. Don't know why. But I am calming down. I tried to talk to my husband, because he has been through this with me before, but he just accused me of using. So that just made it worse. Then I was panicky, and I felt like I had to convince him I have not used at all.
I promise I haven't. It hurts to have to keep saying that, but I understand all the lies that addicts tell.... I HAVE told a few, while using, but not now. I am really working recovery, adn I have been doing very well. I guess with my mother in law getting sick, that has brought back soem really bad memories mof my mom being sick and dying so young.
I talk of my dad like I am a little girl, needing to talk to my dad, but, his deep spirituality helps me so much.
Thank you SO much. I was so dizzy, I think that has passed. I had a major crying jag, when I saw Best answered me, it was like, such a major relief. This board has helped me SO much. I owe so much to SR and all of you!! Thanks, Love, Becky

best

Thing is, just before reading your post I was getting up to check the machines here at work. One last click rather then getting up is when I had seen your post. Guided or coincidence?

angelgirl

No way, you WERE guided, because honestly, I do feel much better, I was really losing it, and it feels so much better, it is lifting. You WERE guided. When I typed that, in the second posting, I thought, he is not going to see that, it is the second one, and I was honestly wondering if I should put your name in the title, but I didn't want to make you feel you had to answer me, so I just typed. I just had this BIG CRY when you answered me right away.. GOD is watching me, he IS there. OH, thank you best. I did know, but I REALLY needed just then to hear it. GOD is so AMAZING!!!
What made you look at my post. I know we haven't talked that much. But, reading your posts brings me GREAT comfort always, and something (god!) told me to type to you, I know he did, others here may think I am totally nuts, but it's ok. You, I and God understand. You are the BEST!! Love, Becky

best

*BIG SMILE*

angelgirl

I'm going to go lay down, and read my bible. I was reading the bible every night before bed, even though most of the time, I really don't understand what I am reading, I always wonder how people interpret the bible, I just have a hard time. But I was reading anyway, because there is some I do understand. Anyway, I had gotten a bit lazy about reading. But I am starting again tonight. I will pray for understanding.
Thanks BEST and for your help and words. You have mush wisdom. I wish I had so much,. Working on that. And I DO believe god brought you to me in a time of need.. Thanks to you and god.
Thanks M also for listening. I was really in need. Very good to hear from those who understand also. I am praying that this doesn't continue. I have had high anxiety for a few days, it has been building, adn finally seemed to come to a head tonight.
Thanks, Love, Becky

angelgirl

Haven't slept well in quite some time, which isn't helping me here. I am prayin for that too. Thanks love, Becky

best

Before I read I ask for His guidance in giving me understanding of what I am reading. His interpretation of what is written.

angelgirl

That is what my dad has told me. I pray, and I still don't seem to understand. I really get afraid that I will never be a good enough person, I feel often that god will not allow me to be a true strong christian. I have to many bad thoughts. I once heard through a church I went to when I was young, that a person can harden their heart to the point where god can not do anything anymore. I pray that is not me. I don't really understand that, but I have bad thoughts sometimes, really bad, about people or things, and all the screwing up I have done, I do wonder if I could ever be a good enough person for god to allow to be a strong christian? It still confuses me.
I know he forgives, but why am I the way I am, why do I continue to have all these bad thoughts? I have prayed and asked god into my heart, take all the sins away, and then I hae those bad thoughts and, do bad things, not using, but other sins, and I know I am not where I should be. I don't know what to do, so I will just keep reading and praying.
Thanks, Love, Becky

best

Seek and you shall find. Ask and it will be given.

Your heart is not hard. The good works he has started in the both of us, He will bring to completion.
I am still a sinner but not as much of a sinner as I once was. daily he helps me grow.

Our sins are forgiven. Yes all of them...Yes even that one and the other one.

You were good enough from the day you were first thought of by Him. None of us are good enough to get into heaven by our own selves. It is the love of Jesus that opens the gates oof heaven so that we may enter. That same love is what will bring the changes to our hearts. Keep reading His word and praying and you will find the truth in His word.

angelgirl

ok, I'm going to lay down, thanks Best. Hopefully I will be able to talk to you again real soon. You have really helped and uplifted me. I strongly believe GOD sent me to you. I have NEVER had a panic attack lift so fast. NEVER. Would hav ebeen a very difficult night, and may have ended up with a trip to the ER, but thanks,. it didn't... Love, Becky

angelgirl

I will continue to pray, and read his word. I REALLY want that for my LIFE. Thank you. Love, Becky