Back and have been trying.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2019
Posts: 519
Back and have been trying.
Hi everyone,
It's been awhile since I was on here, I took a two month trip to Sydney and spent it with family. My goal was not to drink at all there and I failed, had a few blacked out nights and ended up opening up to my family there. My uncle even listened to my entire story of drinking and non judgmentally said that he would help me. It was very sweet, he made me a goals chart on how to stay sober. He calls me every week. The trip was a good one in the sense that I was pretty much forced to speak about my issues and emotions, something I was not doing here. It is too easy here to isolate from friends and family.
When I got back, I felt motivated and happy and sure that I would be ok. Then a couple weeks later, I fell into a massive depression and started isolating and drinking again. I hit a mental rock bottom last week and instead of staying home, I came to my sisters house and stayed 4 nights. Then last Friday, I went to my friends birthday dinner and felt strong until i went with them to a bar (I know, I should NOT have gone) and out of nowhere the urge came and I went home and drank. I drank every night until last night, justifying with whatever excuse I could think of.
Tonight I am sober, staying at my sisters house and I will stay here the entire week into next week.
It seems so difficult to break the habit of drinking in my apartment, I had gotten so used to it. I need to break the habit of associating alcohol with not only my home, but relaxing. I am happiest when I am sober.
I am considering outpatient and have a doctors appt this Wednesday and I will ask for referrals.
Again, I feel hopeful and in despair at the same time. My divorce finalized when I was in Sydney and I am having trouble finding work. My depression doesn't help, all I want to do is sleep all day, which I did this week.
I am excited to continue the journey of getting sober, and I know what I need to do, and what makes me happy, it is just so hard.
I needed to vent and it sure does feel good to be back on here. I will look for a meeting tomorrow.
DAY ONE
It's been awhile since I was on here, I took a two month trip to Sydney and spent it with family. My goal was not to drink at all there and I failed, had a few blacked out nights and ended up opening up to my family there. My uncle even listened to my entire story of drinking and non judgmentally said that he would help me. It was very sweet, he made me a goals chart on how to stay sober. He calls me every week. The trip was a good one in the sense that I was pretty much forced to speak about my issues and emotions, something I was not doing here. It is too easy here to isolate from friends and family.
When I got back, I felt motivated and happy and sure that I would be ok. Then a couple weeks later, I fell into a massive depression and started isolating and drinking again. I hit a mental rock bottom last week and instead of staying home, I came to my sisters house and stayed 4 nights. Then last Friday, I went to my friends birthday dinner and felt strong until i went with them to a bar (I know, I should NOT have gone) and out of nowhere the urge came and I went home and drank. I drank every night until last night, justifying with whatever excuse I could think of.
Tonight I am sober, staying at my sisters house and I will stay here the entire week into next week.
It seems so difficult to break the habit of drinking in my apartment, I had gotten so used to it. I need to break the habit of associating alcohol with not only my home, but relaxing. I am happiest when I am sober.
I am considering outpatient and have a doctors appt this Wednesday and I will ask for referrals.
Again, I feel hopeful and in despair at the same time. My divorce finalized when I was in Sydney and I am having trouble finding work. My depression doesn't help, all I want to do is sleep all day, which I did this week.
I am excited to continue the journey of getting sober, and I know what I need to do, and what makes me happy, it is just so hard.
I needed to vent and it sure does feel good to be back on here. I will look for a meeting tomorrow.
DAY ONE
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,456
Welcome back Nic
I got sober in the same house I used to drink in, so it is possible. Time away may help but in the end you'll need to face that problem.
Maybe you're struggling a little with the acceptance thing ? being out of step with others? never drinking again?
or are you lacking a way to cope with things, without alcohol?
I hope outpatient helps,
Hows your health now?
I got sober in the same house I used to drink in, so it is possible. Time away may help but in the end you'll need to face that problem.
Maybe you're struggling a little with the acceptance thing ? being out of step with others? never drinking again?
or are you lacking a way to cope with things, without alcohol?
I hope outpatient helps,
Hows your health now?
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,518
Welcome back,
I drank at home, alone, so I know what you mean. What worked for me was making conscious changes in my routine. Since my most difficult time was early evening, I made sure to get out of the house. I would walk for about an hour and when I got home, I would continue with my sober evening routine. I think if you figure out what works for you and make a plan, you will be able to do this.
I drank at home, alone, so I know what you mean. What worked for me was making conscious changes in my routine. Since my most difficult time was early evening, I made sure to get out of the house. I would walk for about an hour and when I got home, I would continue with my sober evening routine. I think if you figure out what works for you and make a plan, you will be able to do this.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 13,044
Welcome back! My routine was very similar to Anna’s and I did the same thing. I went for a walk, and then scheduled out the rest of my evening, it was homework with the kids, or binge watching a favorite show I made sure to have a plan.
I also stocked up on lots of non alcoholic drinks: sparkling water, not chocolate, Green Tea...
You can do this.
I also stocked up on lots of non alcoholic drinks: sparkling water, not chocolate, Green Tea...
You can do this.
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