Dandelion12

I wish I wasnt so screwed up and able to receive the love, support and kindness I have received here.

I drink because without it I am in excrutiating pain.

I am simply tired of suffering.

I went from living in a 2 million dollar home in NY to a fixer upper in **** kick Florida.

My ex introduced to something that easily greased the wheels of my horrible phobias and social anxiety - alcohol.

For those in the US, I was arrested last month at Walmart.

First time ever, at 55 years old.

You see I spent 213.00 on groceries and forgot I had the 18 pack of toilet paper under the main basket of the cart at the self checkout, which was the only cashier line open at the time

As I was loading groceries into my car, store security approached me. I immediately apologized and offered to pay promptly. They said theyve had too many thefts and simply couldnt let it slide and arrested me!.

I was devastated and had to call NY for a friend to bail me out.

So Im got anxious And I got more depressed and I have to go to court on the 18th and hope they dont lock me up??

I cant face anymore.

january161992

I'm sorry you're in so much pain and I hope it gets better!

ScottFromWI

Sorry to hear that Dandelion, i'm sure that level heads will prevail in the end. Please don't drink now though, that's the absolute worst possible decision you could make.

I have dealt with debilitating, diagnosed anxiety most of my life too - and i also thought that alcohol was a "cure" for it. And to be honest it did help way back at the beginning. But i can tell you from experience that drinking alcohol is the absolute worst thing you can do for anxiety. There are a lot of things you CAN to to help with anxiety, but drinking counteracts or negates them. And unfortunately the first weeks/months after you quit drinking are really not pleasant. It first takes time for your body chemistry to re-stabilize, and then you need to treat your anxiety after the detox/healing phase is over. It honestly took me 2 years after I quit to finally start getting a handle on my anxiety, and then several years more to really make it virtually a non-factor in my daily life. I did therapy ( multiple different counselors ), tried a few different meds, fixed my diet and sleep patterns, started exercising a little, did some reading, mindfulness and meditation - it's an ongoing process. But it is possible.

Opivotal

Someone that spends 213.00 on groceries hardly needs to steal toilet paper. I'm appalled you were arrested and not given the opportunity to pay. I would suggest you get a lawyer to represent you. Surely, this can be cleared up without a court appearance. Sounds like a set-up to me!

There were steps the cashier and security should've followed before you left the store. Talk to a lawyer, Dandelion and don't drink.

You will not be going to jail. So sorry this happened to you.

Robbie64

I agree, it was completely over the top of security to have the OP arrested. It seems to be a worldwide policy of Walmart though. In the UK they trade as Asda and I know someone who had the police called on them when they did pretty much did what happened to the OP. And again security waited until the person had left the premises and were at their car in the car park. Security could have stopped the person leaving the store and point out the person hadn't paid. I don't know what the law is in the US but in the UK the person has to leave the store before the police can be called. Security have no powers of arrest here in the UK other than what used to be called a citizens arrest which anyone can make.

I also agree that the OP won't be going to prison. A small fine for a first time offence would usually be the outcome here in the UK.

Callas

Random s*** happens all the time. It is never a reason to drink. We all had to learn that and we all have to constantly keep this in mind.

mariposa

Anna

I agree with Opivotal. I think it would be a good idea for you to get a lawyer to help you through this. It sounds like you need some solid legal advice.

I suffer a lot with anxiety, too and always have. And, like you, I turned to alcohol to help me get through a tough time. It made everything so much worse, I couldn't believe it. You will find that you will be able to deal with your anxiety much better when you are sober.

Dandelion12

I can barely afford to live without my husband sincome.

I am scared and very alone.

While I have stopped totally before i have found it impossible to go out without anxiety medication.

I am not stupid or lazy as I have been treated by family.

My drinking started I believe as a way to cope and keep up with everyone else.

I know this is obviously wrong and to stop.

I am huddled under a blanket afraid and crying. No anxiety meds.

Please no tough love or beratement.

I just want some peace.

I begged God for it or i am going to die here.

hopeful4

Can you go to the doctor and get anxiety medication? What is the reason you are without it if I may ask? I am just trying to get a clear picture of the issue at hand.

Keep in mind, people do not understand an addiction, anxiety, or depression. Many times family and friends simply think you should be able "snap out of it." That's just not possible. This is why meetings and a therapist are a must.

Please if you feel badly go to a nearby hospital and reach out for help! I encourage you to also call 800-273-8255. There are caring individuals that can talk you through this.

Sending you a big hug!

jhonnyspa

Hi Dandelion,

You can get sober, it just takes hard work, which I am trying to achieve myself god help me one day at a time, give it a go.In regards to your arrest for theft I find this appalling to say the least in Law there has to be a intention to deceive latin term (mens Rea) for the offence of theft to be complete as you say you paid for all the other groceries and in my opinion a reasonable judge should see that and the case should be dismissed for lack of intention to commit theft.However, if you plead guilty to theft then you are admitting to committing a crime that was within your knowledge and this might be viewed in a different light.Good luck with the sobriety and your court case.

Dee74

I'm sorry for all your pain Dandelion.
The arrest seems ridiciulous to me and I think you should try and see it in that light.

You;re not a shoplifter

If there's one thing I learned in all my years in the wilderness of addiction is that addiction lies to us.

It makes promises that drinking will make everything ok, but in fact of course it just makes it worse.

I had to make a leap of faith that not drinking would help me help myself get to where I wanted to be.

Keeping drinking only kept me in bad situations.

D

Misssy2

They are not going to lock you up...you will just have to pay a fine....
And shoplifting will be on your record.

The only way they would "lock you up" is if this was a habitual problem with you or you had an open crime for something else...other than that you are ok.

So if you are still drinking because of this...use this as your catalyst to stop...because it only gets worse..I promise

mariposa