Things I haven't told my sponsor
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Oakland
Posts: 561
Things I haven't told my sponsor
1. I have 2 beers in my fridge. I don't want to drink them. I know it's not a good idea. I've thrown out so much alcohol and it didn't help me so maybe not throwing this out...dunno.
2. I'm trying to date. I have 7 days I think. But I want to stop hiding and isolating.
2. I'm trying to date. I have 7 days I think. But I want to stop hiding and isolating.
I think you;re putting of telling cos you know what your sponsor is gonna say and I agree - dump the beers, and put the dating on the back burner for now Press.
Fight for your recovery two handed.
D
Fight for your recovery two handed.
D
well......if you want to stop hiding, start with not hiding from your sponsor
hopefully this will be a relationship where honesty is the foundation. otherwise, how can they “help” you if you don’t let them see who you are and where you’re at?
you do get to decide what you will and will not do; the sponsor will make suggestions and guide through step-work, hopefully, but certainly cannot make you do anything you do not wish to do or stop you from doing the things you wish to do.
hopefully this will be a relationship where honesty is the foundation. otherwise, how can they “help” you if you don’t let them see who you are and where you’re at?
you do get to decide what you will and will not do; the sponsor will make suggestions and guide through step-work, hopefully, but certainly cannot make you do anything you do not wish to do or stop you from doing the things you wish to do.
It’s difficult Pressmetilihurt, it reminds me of a friend of mine who had stopped smoking and told everybody that he had an unopened pack of cigarettes in his pack up bag and had never touched them..... He had reached his rock bottom though, a few health scares for him and his wife...advice from the doc not to smoke...it could literally kill him....
Hopefully you’re not at your rock bottom and while you can, ditch the booze. If you’re struggling....play the tape, where will it end?
Hopefully you’re not at your rock bottom and while you can, ditch the booze. If you’re struggling....play the tape, where will it end?
youll find someone as sick or sicker than yourself dating. good luck with it.
I've thrown out so much alcohol and it didn't help me so maybe not throwing this out...dunno.
BS excuse to keep em. didnt work before because you didnt work for it.
remind me again why you got a sponsor,please?
I've thrown out so much alcohol and it didn't help me so maybe not throwing this out...dunno.
BS excuse to keep em. didnt work before because you didnt work for it.
remind me again why you got a sponsor,please?
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
Morning Press- have to say, ditto Dee and tomsteve.
What is your plan for today, meeting sponsor, going to a meeting, throwing out beer, some kind of other stuff that's helpful to not drink and make day 8, then the next...?
What is your plan for today, meeting sponsor, going to a meeting, throwing out beer, some kind of other stuff that's helpful to not drink and make day 8, then the next...?
Dump them, but make a ritual out of it and a solid, solemn commitment to not drink at all, for any reason, for 6 months.
6 months and then you can see how you feel and if you want to extend the time further--
If you don't promise yourself, and mean it, you won't succeed.
If the real point is to stop and not just kid yourself you want to stop,
make dumping those beers count.
6 months and then you can see how you feel and if you want to extend the time further--
If you don't promise yourself, and mean it, you won't succeed.
If the real point is to stop and not just kid yourself you want to stop,
make dumping those beers count.
Yeah, get rid of the beer. The only real purpose for their presence is to be there when you "need" them, but get real! They are readily available 24/7 at any local convenience store.
Now the matter of them being in your refrigerator and somehow preventing you from drinking is nothing but magical thinking. There is no logical reason for this being beneficial. Even the most spiritually minded in recovery, will tell you that.
Having said that, after I quit drinking and was cleaning up the mess, I did find several old whisky bottles, and somehow I was able to deduce (partly by evoking the supernatural) which one was probably the last one I drank. I kept it as a sort of trophy for awhile, but it was just a "joke" trophy that I kept on display in a bookcase. It even had some left over residue inside the bottle, and every once in a while, I would uncap it and have a whiff. Then I would put the cap back on, replace it in the cabinet, and in mock politeness I would say to the bottle, "No thank you very much, and while you're at it, go **** yourself."
Eventually, that bottle disappeared, I don't know what happened to it actually, but I no longer have a physical token of my drinking days. No matter; I've got plenty of memories to remind me why I'm sober.
Now the matter of them being in your refrigerator and somehow preventing you from drinking is nothing but magical thinking. There is no logical reason for this being beneficial. Even the most spiritually minded in recovery, will tell you that.
Having said that, after I quit drinking and was cleaning up the mess, I did find several old whisky bottles, and somehow I was able to deduce (partly by evoking the supernatural) which one was probably the last one I drank. I kept it as a sort of trophy for awhile, but it was just a "joke" trophy that I kept on display in a bookcase. It even had some left over residue inside the bottle, and every once in a while, I would uncap it and have a whiff. Then I would put the cap back on, replace it in the cabinet, and in mock politeness I would say to the bottle, "No thank you very much, and while you're at it, go **** yourself."
Eventually, that bottle disappeared, I don't know what happened to it actually, but I no longer have a physical token of my drinking days. No matter; I've got plenty of memories to remind me why I'm sober.
Keeping those beers around is making you obsess about them. Get rid of them. Make it a ceremony of some sort, and commit to sobriety at the same time. I did that when I quit. I still had a little bit of booze in my house (I didn't drink at home much) and I dumped it down the sink while repeating, F*** you over and over again. Was quite cathartic.
I like MDL’s approach!
The only reason these beers are still in your frig is because you subconsciously want to drink them at some point. You have not told yourself “never again.” Tell yourself this, and tell your sponsor too. Wait on the dating for a while. There will still be plenty of fish in the sea when you are ready
The only reason these beers are still in your frig is because you subconsciously want to drink them at some point. You have not told yourself “never again.” Tell yourself this, and tell your sponsor too. Wait on the dating for a while. There will still be plenty of fish in the sea when you are ready
That's a ceremony of finality and commitment that makes a lot more sense than a ritual of keeping the bottles there so as not to offend the gods of alcohol. In addition to any assumed magical benefits, it's a fun ceremony too. Similar to an exorcism. Imagine having that kind of power over evil spirits, mightily casting them out with an authoritative booming voice and commanding them down the drain to the eternal darkness. Whew! What a trip!
3 days ago your concern was your child wanting to live with the other parent. in order of life priorities i would say getting yourself together and in a good stable place as a human first and as a parent takes top billing over trying to start dating with a few days sobriety under your belt.
no outside person place or thing is going to MAKE you OK. that is your job. to find peace and centeredness. that takes time. hard work to be honest. daily.
no outside person place or thing is going to MAKE you OK. that is your job. to find peace and centeredness. that takes time. hard work to be honest. daily.
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 97
Dump the beers Press and don't look to date anyone. You would not be good for anyone right now and they wouldn't be good for you. You have way too much going on much lower on the hierarchy of human needs too. Your sobriety and your son to name the most obvious two. Introducing some stranger into the mix sounds like an awful decision in too many ways to count. Not to mention your health concerns that are bothering you so much.
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