xxxNICHOLExxx

I can’t shake this craving and urge to drink it’s only day 4. It’s been on my mind for awhile!! I’ve tried to do things to keep my mind off of it but no matter what I do it’s still there.. I’m tired of drinking I know my drinking isn’t normal or okay it’s always the same I tell myself I’ll only have one or two and It always ends in a complete blackout or passing out!! I never had long term sobriety almost 40 days is the longest I’ve been in 5 years but it seems impossible to stop!!! My anxiety is through the roof to where my hands are shaking I have no clue what to do I know you have to want sobriety more then you want to drink but sometimes it feels like it beats you down to where the only way out and to stop everything is to drink!! Im getting to the point where I’m tried of trying...

AnvilheadII

drinking prolongs the cravings.
stopping is the only solution.
no means no.
don't drink right now.
don't drink ten minutes from now.
go to bed sober.
even if that means you are in bed by 5pm.
cravings never killed anybody and cravings never last.
hang in there.

Dee74

Hi Nichole

I used to think it was impossible too but I flipped my stubborness - that same stubborness that kept me drinking when I knew it would ended badly...
I made that work for me as a non drinker.

I really didn't not want to drink anymore - and as soon as my actions and decisions started to reflect that - it got a lot easier.

Have you eaten lately - eating is a good way to quiet the cravings?

D

ReadyAtLast

Nichole, it's really normal to feel as you do in the first week.I know for me the lack of sleep and emotional angst was just the worst but then I was driving to work on day 7 and everything seemed that much brighter. You will get through this and it will get better, I promise you. but if you pick up a drink nothing will ever get better.

WhoDeyPI

I'm no doctor, but it seems that you're likely shaking from withdrawals, not anxiety. Get through that, and you're gucci.

Ghostlight1

Yes, it can seem impossible. Especially early on in sobriety. The fourth day was a killer for me, too. I can't remember how many times I gave in. Many.
But it is possible. I'm a living example. I drank like you. One drink and it was passout or blackout.
I drank like this for thirty years.
I've been sober ten years now. If I can do it, you can too. I know you can. Just believe in yourself that you never have to dink again. And you don't have to.

We're all here for you. Eating something is a good idea.
I feel for you. I know what it's like to go through, but don't give up before the miracle happens.
Best to you.

DariaM

I'm not sure if this will help you, but about an hour or so ago the thought of, "I'd really like some wine for this evening ." kicked in. So for dinner I'm getting some greasy pizza and a 2 liter of soda. Is it healthy or ideal? No. But I need something to look forward too; a treat that's not wine. Maybe whatever that could be for you? I'm also just allowing myself to just be. Not clean the house, not do xyz... just do things I enjoy; focus on things that make me happy vs. what I think I'm missing out on. Maybe it's a distraction, but it's what I have right now and it's helped me this afternoon at least. I hope you're able to find something to help you.

Anna

Nichole, it seems impossible, but it isn't. And, the only way to do it, is to just get through it. Each day will be a bit better and the cravings will lessen. The early days are hard, but it's worth the effort.

xxxNICHOLExxx

Thanks everyone it’s just aggravating when you want sobriety and need it but then yet craving comes in or withdraws and it seems overwhelming its like when is enough...,.enough I’ve had some pretty lows in drinking and some times I have no clue how I didn’t end up in the hospital or dead i feel like I’m getting to the point where I might actually have to get help for my addiction out of the 17 years of drinking not one positive thing has came from it and I definitely don’t want to spend the rest of my life drinking because I know there is more out there then this lifestyle I never thought it would be this hard or I would be in this spot

Dee74

I think getting help could be a huge step forward Nichole

D

Robert88

There is anti-craving medication for alcohol if you think that would help? It makes you sick as hell if you drink while on it though.

Atlast9999

360shoes

Hi Nicole. I get it. Today was my hard day too. I wasn't happy how I was feeling either. But I did take a minute to compare it to the hell of before. So as hard as today was. It still was better than how I felt drinking. Had I got a bottle I can promise you I would be sitting here feeling hopeless.. and drunk. And a whole lot more.

So I am just going to sit here quietly under a blanket with a fizzy water knowing today wasn't my best day. But it was far far from my worst.

Hang in there. Ask for help when you need it. We all need help with hard stuff

Dee74

Hi Robert - antabuse isn't suitable for everyone.

You' re clearly trying to help and that's cool

If you've used it yourself we'd like to hear your experience - but just recommending meds goes against our no medical advice rule.

Any one considering taking antabuse or any other meds really needs to see their Dr about it
Dee
Moderator
SR

DriGuy

If you were feeling this on day 1, I would tell you to get ready for day 4. When you drink every day, your addiction only has to give you a light nudge to reach for the bottle. When you go several days without alcohol, your addiction starts screaming. You body and mind is cries out for more alcohol.

Day 3 was the day where I always caved in an blew it. When I committed myself to life long abstinence, I just rode the cravings out. They were easily manageable after a week, but it's different for everyone.

Stronger2017

least

Yes, it's hard to get and stay sober, at first, but it's not impossible. You have to get thru the hard part and it will get easier with time.

xxxNICHOLExxx

I am happy to say I didn’t drink and still sober!! It’s definitely trying to get over the hard part but I need to remember this feeling of sobriety in the morning because it’s definitely worth pushing through the withdrawals and cravings!!! I do struggle probably more then I should maybe??? I have live a lifestyle where drinking has been top priority there has been times where we went places that said no alcohol allowed and didn’t go because we didn’t see any fun in that!!! Which now thinking about it sounds little crazy!! As of now I’m trying to change my lifestyle not hangout with certain people not go to certain places but it’s hard when my husband is a daily drinking and we share same friends..I know the summer be a struggle by of the hobbies and activities we do drinking is always there and the parties are usually full force I’m hoping to get enough sober muscles by then to be able to resist drinking I still want to do my normal summer weekend because it is how me and my husband bond and spend time together and I do enjoy them I just want to do it sober!!

Fearlessat50

Hi Nicole! You sound better this morning, which is great! Don’t you feel stronger that you got through that difficult phase without giving in? You can expect continued moments and even days at a time with strong cravings for a time. The shaking is probably from withdrawals. Physical withdrawal symptoms may last 10 days, or more if this is not your first attempt at sobriety and you’ve relapsed before. You will keep getting stronger as long as you don’t give in. If you give in, you are just reinforcing the cycle and making it more difficult to stay sober with every attempt.

It sounds like getting some outside help would really serve you. For my final quit, I went to my doctor and got a prescription to help with anxiety and depression due to withdrawals. I did not take forever, but I don’t know how I could have gotten through without in the beginning. I also started really focusing on changing myself, my thoughts, habits and behaviors that led to a drinking problem in the first place. I went to therapy for a year. I made a list of my “triggers” and replaced drinking with other routines like yoga, meditation, journaling and exercise (as well as coming to SR and practicing gratitude).

In the beginning, the vivid memory of your last bad drinking experience can keep you motivated. For long term sobriety, though, I had to change myself and my lifestyle. It sounds like you are already thinking about this

You say your husband is a daily drinker. Do you suspect he has a drinking problem as well? Is he on board with your desire to stop? I think it’s so important that he is. My husband did not believe my problem was that significant at first, and also made comments that my not drinking anymore was going to affect “his lifestyle.” I had so much resentment for a long time over this. After Several relapses, individual and couples therapy and near divorce, we are now on the same page and he is supportive. He still drinks, but normal amounts for the most part. He actually drinks less than he used to, and says I inspired him to be more self aware. I wish I had been more honest and open about my feelings in the beginning.

Stay strong!

snitch

Hey darling. I agree with Dee. X x