Doris47

So I was full of hopes an dreams, I was full of I can do this, full of ha, I haven't got a problem after all. (Binge drinker). I caved in on day 14, Ffs. What's wrong with me.I know all the scenario, I know all the"chat" I know all the physic, I know why I do it, I know everything you could possibly know. SO WHY AM I HERE? I've gone down every path, and what ? What now ? I'm a binge drinking coke taking fook up, I work , I've family , I've friends what the f is missing, man I've been here so many times, I've tried AA not for me. I'm at a place now, where I can't be trusted about to hit self destruct. 😫😱😫😱😱 oh **** it, **** it all man

Doris47

Please please talk to m e 😨😨😨

least

It's hard to get sober for good, but it can be done. Try again and do something different to get you out of the relapse trap.

I relapsed over and over but finally got sober. If I can do it, so can you!

Snowydelrico

Doris, this phase will pass.
The thing that is missing is your new sober life that you are creating.
Be patient.
You have to walk through hell and get out the other side to know you will never go back.
Crawl if you can’t walk just don’t stop.

Chin up
You can do this

BigShoe

His Doris. Glad you are here. 14days is pretty great. You proved you can do it and you have proved you need to. All the voices in your head are are not “you.” Please treat yourself as a friend or a small child and go easy.
You have a job. Family. Friends. Anywhere to ask for help? Help in not taking that first drink. You have a lot of things that are not easy to come by. You can accomplish what seems impossible.
I found great help in the book this naked mind and by reading up on avrt on this website. A lot of great info here. Make it through today. You are needed

Snowydelrico

Fighting your brain chemistry is hard.
Hard things can be done.
A little like bringing a first born up.
You have to do it.
Re wire your brain by repeating a healthy routine.
Mindfulness, yoga, relaxation.
AVRT
The voices quieten after a while
Things are heightened in early recovery
You will level out, just tell yourself it will be ok because it will.

Taooo

I hope you are ok, don't give up bro we can do this.

Doris47

I'm sitting here sobbing my heart out. I know why I do it, I know the chat, I know everything,so why can't I stop. I try,try an I try 47 yrs old man it's fooked uo

Doris47

I've walked through hell an some 😫

Doris47

I've never been so down,

Taooo

Talking has been helping me. Whats eating you?

Doris47

Man if I opened the flood gates it would be a point of NI return 😱

travelbug

If you keep on doing what you are doing it will kill you, You are poisoning yourself. You are putting poison in your body. The same as taking Draino. Choose LIFE. You are strong. You made it 14 days, that was the hard part. Don't you want to be around to see your family from up? Life is good. You can do it. Just keep coming back here. We are your support

Doris47

I'm not strong, if I was I wouldn't be here, my boy is my world, 😫

MantaLady

Go easy on yourself! It takes an incredible amount of strength and courage to reach out for help and post here, we all fall, and your strength is the fact you get back up and keep trying! You are not a quitter, you’ve proved it each time you pick yourself up and try again. x

decchemist

Hello Doris47.

Your original post is full of regret yet the sentence that jumped out at me was 'I've tried AA not for me.' If you want to quit then you must find something that IS for you. There was a saying round these parts that I saw quite a lot over the last year which was 'No-one is coming to save me.' It's the truth. You MUST save yourself with positive action. We will all support you.

If you can do 14 days then repeat that from right now.

JustTony

I've relapsed so many times it is ridiculous.

Listen - your liver doesn't count days. Your body, mind and organs were glad of the break you gave them over 14 days and don't forget that.

Now back on the wagon soldier.

Doris47

I just cant do it, 'm maybe we are all meaning to be saved

JustTony

You can and you will. It's the drink and AV talking.

Tip it away and go to bed.

Hevyn

Doris - I'm another one who relapsed many times, but now I have many years sober. I finally realized the fun times I spent drinking could never, ever return. I had crossed over from social drinking to alcoholic drinking - & there was no going back. I needed it, or I'd shake & get sick. It was a horrible way to live. Please don't give up on a better life for yourself. Stay here with us & keep talking. Someone is always around to offer encouragement. We care about you.

And - yes you CAN do it.