This is OOC
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Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: Midwest, USA
Posts: 394
This is OOC
I mentioned in another thread that my husband wanted me to take a breathalyzer before leaving me alone with our kid. I said I'd do it, but nothing came of it.
Still sober, but today he "smells" alcohol on me and threw a strip in my face. I'm sorry. That is NOT appropriate. I do NOT need to prove myself. I'm not driving, and I've been present. I feel so lost and frustrated because he can claim what he wants.
It doesn't matter that I watched our son for the last 3 out of 4 days. Saturday, husband went out with friends to get drunk. (My first weekend back at home. Such good support. As he says, "I'm not drinking around you." Go F yourself. %$*&#*$).
Sorry. But on Monday/Tuesday (as I'm STILL flu suffering for like two weeks), son didn't have school from the holiday and a snow day. And husband worked Tuesday night. So not sure what gives today, but am I bad for not bending at his whim? I don't want this to become a control issue, and I understand context both ways. However, I shouldn't feel like I'm in jail. We are still married, and I'm home with the same responsibilities as even before rehab.
Worst part was that we fought in front of my son. I excused myself and almost went to my parents, but now I'm segregated to the bedroom. Not good, especially because we were supposed to have a family game night, which my son no matter wants. I'm sure not after our fight. God.
On a GOOD note. Still sober and I made it to a meeting today! Got some phone #s and invited for coffee.
Still sober, but today he "smells" alcohol on me and threw a strip in my face. I'm sorry. That is NOT appropriate. I do NOT need to prove myself. I'm not driving, and I've been present. I feel so lost and frustrated because he can claim what he wants.
It doesn't matter that I watched our son for the last 3 out of 4 days. Saturday, husband went out with friends to get drunk. (My first weekend back at home. Such good support. As he says, "I'm not drinking around you." Go F yourself. %$*&#*$).
Sorry. But on Monday/Tuesday (as I'm STILL flu suffering for like two weeks), son didn't have school from the holiday and a snow day. And husband worked Tuesday night. So not sure what gives today, but am I bad for not bending at his whim? I don't want this to become a control issue, and I understand context both ways. However, I shouldn't feel like I'm in jail. We are still married, and I'm home with the same responsibilities as even before rehab.
Worst part was that we fought in front of my son. I excused myself and almost went to my parents, but now I'm segregated to the bedroom. Not good, especially because we were supposed to have a family game night, which my son no matter wants. I'm sure not after our fight. God.
On a GOOD note. Still sober and I made it to a meeting today! Got some phone #s and invited for coffee.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: Midwest, USA
Posts: 394
Originally Posted by Mizzuno 
Do you have someone you can stay with?
Do you have a date as to when he or you will move out?
Do you have a date as to when he or you will move out?
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: New England
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You are doing your part, being a good mom, and agreed to the initial breathalyzer and it sounds to me like that's plenty. I agree, his behavior is over the top and good for you removing yourself from a situation that could have escalated.
Gaining trust is one thing, but putting up with disrespectful behavior is a whole other story.
I guess I'm just sending you support with this post because I don't have any advice- except to plainly and calmly state that you are sober and walk away whenever the interaction becomes heated.
Best to you, and congrats on your sober time.
Gaining trust is one thing, but putting up with disrespectful behavior is a whole other story.
I guess I'm just sending you support with this post because I don't have any advice- except to plainly and calmly state that you are sober and walk away whenever the interaction becomes heated.
Best to you, and congrats on your sober time.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: Midwest, USA
Posts: 394
Thank you all for your encouraging posts. I'm an emotional person (aren't we alkies all?), but I'm trying to remain reasonable and respectful. I will not let him take advantage of this situation. Thank you for the support.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: Midwest, USA
Posts: 394
Update: I went to my parents for a week and now I'm home. Still extremely triggered which is very irritating. Luckily, I've gotten more of a plan in place and I no longer have the flu so I can put it in action. I did go an AA meeting today. 
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