Updating at a month in...
Updating at a month in...
One month sober. Feel like I've gotten a bit of a 'free-ride' for the last week as I've been unwell so the cravings have been really minimal... I've not felt like drinking at all. Thing is, if I had of been sick like this and not sober, I think I would've still been pouring booze down my throat in the evenings and calling it 'medicinal' or whatever excuse! Madness!
Anyway, I passed on my virus to my two year old daughter so she's been unwell too. Thing was, looking back over the weekend, even though I was unwell, I felt like she was better cared for while she was sick because I wasn't drinking. Don't get me wrong, my kids are never neglected etc, but I've always felt like I could be doing a better job with them without alcohol in the picture. And reflecting on the last 4 days I've seen this in action now. Her rest was a priority, I encouraged her to eat good foods, drink plenty of water and just sat and cuddled her when she needed it. It's a bitter sweet feeling, when you have that moment of clarity that THIS is what it needs to be like. Not drunk mum, sending the kids off to play alone while I drown myself in a bottle of wine and more...I can NEVER go back to that. I want to focus on the present and future, but need to remember how bad it can get. How guilty and anxious alcohol can make me feel.
I need to stay vigilant now I'm feeling better as the cravings will probably ramp back up. Hope you're all doing well
Anyway, I passed on my virus to my two year old daughter so she's been unwell too. Thing was, looking back over the weekend, even though I was unwell, I felt like she was better cared for while she was sick because I wasn't drinking. Don't get me wrong, my kids are never neglected etc, but I've always felt like I could be doing a better job with them without alcohol in the picture. And reflecting on the last 4 days I've seen this in action now. Her rest was a priority, I encouraged her to eat good foods, drink plenty of water and just sat and cuddled her when she needed it. It's a bitter sweet feeling, when you have that moment of clarity that THIS is what it needs to be like. Not drunk mum, sending the kids off to play alone while I drown myself in a bottle of wine and more...I can NEVER go back to that. I want to focus on the present and future, but need to remember how bad it can get. How guilty and anxious alcohol can make me feel.
I need to stay vigilant now I'm feeling better as the cravings will probably ramp back up. Hope you're all doing well
It's ironic that we thought it was helping us to be calm & cope better. Now we know - it just made things more stressful & added to our anxiety. Never again.
Congrats on your one month - you're doing great.
Congrats on your one month - you're doing great.
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