Cassandralee

I've been thinking about this and wondering what other peoples' motivation is. Did you hit a rock bottom or was it a combination of various reasons like health, family, money?

I feel like I've hit many rock bottoms, some very dangerous ones. But for some reason, they were never enough for me to stop drinking for any length of time.

For me it wasn't actually my own rock bottom that woke me up, it was my mother's.

She battled alcoholism ever since I was a child.

Like all of us, she had her functioning times over the years. But the past few years, no matter how hard my family tried, no matter how many times she went into Rehab, we couldn't save her from the addiction. Watching this happen, the end stages, has forever changed me.

I think in a way, watching her abuse herself for so long, I started to think she was indestructible. So I sort of thought, well, if she's ok to do this to her body, for this long, then I should be ok because I don't even drink as much as her. Mind you, when she was my age, she only drank about the same as me.

My Mum died 4 months ago. She had been drinking, alone, and she died from a head injury (fell over outside). She lay there and died alone with a bottle of wine next to her. No words can describe the pain of finding her. I never ever want my daughter to have to go through that, with me.

Steely

I am so sorry Casandralee.

My father died as a result of his alcoholism and like you do not want to die a drunk. I want for my kids to know when I die that I had given it my best shot and that I had finally stopped.

I'm 101 days sober today, and though I know this is for keeps it gives me some measure of real accomplishment to 'count the days'.

Join the crew Casandralee you will make your daughter proud, just as my kids are proud of me now. I'm proud of me now, and it's been a long time coming.

Hope to see you around. I'm from NSW, where 'bouts are you? C'm on aussie c'm on.

queenofheartz09

Thank you for sharing your story about your mother. I'm sorry for your loss. The reason I am quitting is for my kids. I am scared they would find me dead or watch me die in a hospital and that is the main reason I am quiting. Your story helps solidify for me that I need to quit and I will! Thanks again.

FeelingGreat

I worried about its effect on my health but I did that for a long time. The actual moment came when my DIL was trying to give up smoking and I wasn't feeling very sympathetic when it dawned on me I was doing just as much damage to myself and would be a real hypocrite if couldn't give up drinking. After that something clicked and it was no longer the white-knuckle effort I'd made before, but relatively easy.

LDT

Honestly, I stopped for my kids. But I now stay stopped for me. Everyone's "bottom" is different. Some maybe more dramatic than others. Mine was a sort of quiet revelation that it might be a good idea to quit permanently. It wasn't working for me any longer.

MissPerfumado

I couldn't keep it up any longer. I was struggling to maintain my performance at work. I had an important and imminent transfer that was going to make or break my career, and I knew the jig would be up if I didn't sober up.

My body was breaking down. Liver tests came back abnormal from my annual medical. All sorts of weird reactions were showing up ... abdominal pains, rashes, the gagging in the morning ... I was concealing a lot of symptoms.

My personal life was spiralling out of control. The weekend before I quit I spent text-ranting my then boyfriend into the wee hours of Sunday morning and when I woke up hours later the first thought I had was I HAVE TO GET SOBER.

I knew I didn't have much time. I knew I was racing to the bottom and I was terrified. I didn't want to die from drinking. I didn't want to lose my job. I wanted my life back.

That was bottom enough for me.

SueDenim

Another one doing it for health reasons.

I am really scared that I have damaged my body beyond repair, and want to retire in the next couple of years. I am scared that I won't have a retirement to enjoy, and even more scared of what the doctor would say if I dared go fora check-up.

My plan is to stop for a month or so, then get checked out. If I die in service, by husband gets 3xsalary plus half my pension for life. If I die in retirement, he just gets the pension.

What the doctor says in a month (3 weeks now) will determine whether I retire or work till the end. I want to finally do what's best for my husband and the children. I am also terrified of having 'cirrhosis' on my death certificate. I know I won't be there to see it; but it is not what I want for my (grown-up) children to have to live with.

PhoenixJ

Alcohol- why I stopped/
Because it killed my bro
Because it played a part in the death of my dad
Because I drank- got terrible burns, died (X3). From that I lost my wife, 2 adult sons, home, career, money and possessions.
I woke up.

Grymt

The first time I drank freely at 18 I blacked out. I then went to uni. After a year and a half I was turning up to lectures drunk. Eventually I dropped out. I started my geographicals looking for that elusive place where everything was ok. By the time I was 26 I went to an AA meeting and quit for 7 months. That was my first attempt at quitting. I'm a bit slow so it took another 20 odd years to get it right. What I'm trying to say is that I quit first time and everytime because my life had become unmanageable. In the beginning it was mostly to get some control back. In the end it was to live. Alcoholism is progressive. Each time I drank I continued the downward spiral from where I left off. I think at the end this stupid stubborn sob got smart. Or perhaps it was just getting sick and tired of being sick and tired.

gatorman

I quit smoking 7 years ago. I lost almost 100 pounds over the past few years and got healthy. The next step to better health was to quit drinking. I did it for myself. Yesterday I passed my 8th month.

LadyBlue0527

I'm sorry for your loss Cassandralee

I quit because I finally reached the point where I had exhausted every avenue available to be able to drink and learned a valuable lesson. Whenever I start back up again the path will always lead me to a deeper rock bottom. With the last occurrence I shudder to think of what that next one would be and I now know that I no longer have to worry about that again. Ever.

shauninspain

After a zillion attempts to 'control and enjoy my drinking' I finally had to admit that I could not. Despite a mountain of evidence I always thought that 'this time' it will be different, 'this time' I will succeed. I never did. Totally accepting my illness set me free.

Readytodothis

I went from daily drinking to binge drinking. In between binges, I realized how much better life is not drinking.

Also, my toddler has a chronic, severe health condition and I have to be strong and healthy for her. What if something happens and she needs medical attention....and I just blacked out? Inexcusable and disgusting. Also, as she gets older, it will be important for her to live a healthy, active lifestyle and that is exactly what I am going to model for her.

totfit

I have "quit drinking" several times over the years. I guess really I was sober and had some slips instead, but many, many years ago I drank in spite of all consequences and I had many. I thing it finally just got to the point that I could not do it any more. It made absolutely no sense, so I began working to build a life sober with primarily going to the core of who I was and moving in a positive direction. I really think after all of the struggling it just became to me that what I had been doing had absolutely no attraction any longer and became total nonsense. That is where alcohol became not the problem, but living a good live became the problem and the solution. I am just continuing the journey now "sans alcohol". I wish folks did not have struggles to get sober, but without the struggles there would be no reason, nor would it be necessary.

tnek97

As the saying goes, I was sick and tired of being sick and tired.

I also had dreams for myself that I knew would never materialize so long as I kept pulling the heavy blanket of booze over my body.

But it wasn't a single moment of clarity, where I swore of alcohol for good. I wanted to "take a break" back in November. Through a LOT of SR reading, book reading, and personal reflection, the acceptance of living a sober life became less terrifying, and more attainable.

I'm no longer sick and tired, and those dreams seem less like fantasies, and more like goals within reach.

least

I finally quit drinking cause I was sick and tired of waking up feeling horrible and hating myself.

PhoenixJ

I will add however I do not worry about myself. Doing ok. BUT being a 4th gen. male alcy- I do worry about my 2 sons.

shortstop81

My personal bottom wasn't so much based on external consequences as it was on my own 'soul sickness'. After so many broken promises to myself and loved ones, I just couldn't stand myself anymore. It was either earnest recovery or suicide.

Now at over 3 months sober, I'm slowly mending my relationship with myself. I have a long way to go, but at least I no longer engage in behaviours that cause me immense shame and guilt.

BrendaChenowyth

Wow. That's powerful. I'm sorry that happened to you.

Unfortunately, suffering is our greatest teacher. For me, I was just sick and tired of suffering and the shame of knowing I was doing it to myself.

duane1

I would be dead if I hadn't quit. My liver was throbbing daily until I had my first few drinks in me. Even then, it took me months to finally do it. Once I had some distance from it, I could see it for what it was worth and didn't dare go back.