Krusinforbrusin

The anxiety today has been pretty much non stop. I had cravings at lunch time when I took my two daughters out for lunch I kept looking at the bar I guess you could say I had a thirst for a drink. Since this is the first time I have really committed myself to not drink I'm really scared. I have been concerned about my drinking before but this last friday I got drunk and had the worst ptsd anxiety attack while drunk. It was an anniversary of a really traumatic event and I was trying to drink to not think about it but it really backfired. Waking up Saturday I found out I posted a really bizarre status message while drunk and everyone was worried about me. No one really knows I drink a lot except my family so I can't share my story or successes with anyone so I'm glad to have found this forum to get support and just talk about it.
I was proud today to wake up early and accomplish a lot. I made appointments, brought my children to their appointments on time, even cleaning more so I hope this continues. But I feel kind of bad because my husband asked me right after my long day if I wanted some wine. Then after immediately said "Oh ya your not drinking". Which is fine but then he drinks a whole 5oz bottle of wine right in front of me and then walks away and leaves the rest of the four pack he bought right on the counter. I swear it was calling to me. Tonight I came on the internet and found this forum as a way to stay strong and remember just why I am changing my life. It helped and now 4 hours later my husband is passed out in bed drunk and I still have energy and am doing laundry so I guess I did good this time. Wish me luck! I hope to go through this journey with some of you and we can help eachother out. My anxiety is saying this post is not making sense but I'm going to post anyways.

columbus

"My anxiety is saying this post is not making sense but I'm going to post anyways. "

You did good. Welcome.

Ghostlight1

Hello, welcome and congratulations on six days. That's a great start.
I'm glad you found us. You'll find lots of support here.
And don't worry, your post made perfect sense.
So keep coming back and post away.
I drank alone so my situation was different than yours, but I can still empathize.
Best to you, and remember, you never have to drink again.

Delilah1

Welcome to SR Krusin!! I'm glad you found us. This is an incredibly supportive site, spend some time reading, and posting, to see what will work for you.

You may want to join the January of 2017 class, you will have the support of others who have also stopped drinking this month. Also, the 24 hour thread is a great place to get to know people and to commit to sobriety 24 hours at a time.

Looking forward to seeing you on here!

Mentium

Welcome! From someone who has tried to quit many times and is on their umpteenth go take it from me - save yourself a lot of grief and make it stick!

All the very best of luck!

hodor

Congratulations on getting to day 6. It gets much better! I can't believe that now I look forward to going to bed at night without having to black out. Waking up in the morning I can get up pretty early without feeling like I'm going to die without an extra hour or two sleep to get past the worst of the hangover.
Keep up the great work and just keep simple, one day at a time.

Michael66

Well done on day 6. These early days are tough aren't they?! I made the mistake of throwing away 4 years of sobriety and am having to go through these early days again. Never again!!!

You'll find lots of support and advice here.

waywardson8260

Congratulations on your first 6 days Krusin! This is a long journey but it does get better!

Dee74

Welcome to SR Kruisin

Anxiety is rough but most of us find it gets better

I'm not sure if you can ask your husband not to drink in front of you, but if that's an option, I'd ask him. I also think having lunch at places which don't serve alcohol might make a tough time a little less tough?

D

Anna

Good job on your decision to stop drinking. I hope that you maintain your sobriety even if your husband does continue to drink. He may be impressed with your recovery and decide to join you, but if not, you already know that things are better when you're not drinking.