Day 7, I could use some help :)
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 38
Day 7, I could use some help :)
Hi everyone,
I was using alcohol to manage my emotions. Went through a divorce, relocation, and had so much fear. I know I use alcohol to numb and feel "strong".
It always backfires, but I've been so panicked, and I tell myself I just need ONE to calm down...
I end up binging. It's disgusting and u know it, but my emotions are all over the place.
So it's been seven days. I KNOW alcohol does not work. Yet feel so dumb and helpless I'm actually fighting myself to not have "just one". Its unbelievable.
I was not a drinker growing up. I'm 53 now. Why???
Please if anyone can relate please tell me how to deal with the feelings that are coming up. The only was i know how to cope is get numb.
Thanks very much
I was using alcohol to manage my emotions. Went through a divorce, relocation, and had so much fear. I know I use alcohol to numb and feel "strong".
It always backfires, but I've been so panicked, and I tell myself I just need ONE to calm down...
I end up binging. It's disgusting and u know it, but my emotions are all over the place.
So it's been seven days. I KNOW alcohol does not work. Yet feel so dumb and helpless I'm actually fighting myself to not have "just one". Its unbelievable.
I was not a drinker growing up. I'm 53 now. Why???
Please if anyone can relate please tell me how to deal with the feelings that are coming up. The only was i know how to cope is get numb.
Thanks very much
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: US
Posts: 5,095
Hey Sassy
It has been my personal experience that most alcoholics don't process strong emotions well. Some of us may be born this way. may develop this in childhood or may develop this as a result of big life changes. Sounds like you are the latter. You speak of your divorce and move in the past tense. Is it those events that you are still struggling with?
Well if you're alcoholic, then ya gotta develop new ways of coping. It sounds like some group support would really help you. AA, church, divorce support groups? Maybe some counseling. I like AA because it addresses life issues, spirituality, addiction and community. And its free!
It sounds like you developed alcoholism later in life. If that's the case you probably have a much stronger foundation than you think. You just need some help reconnecting with it.
It has been my personal experience that most alcoholics don't process strong emotions well. Some of us may be born this way. may develop this in childhood or may develop this as a result of big life changes. Sounds like you are the latter. You speak of your divorce and move in the past tense. Is it those events that you are still struggling with?
Well if you're alcoholic, then ya gotta develop new ways of coping. It sounds like some group support would really help you. AA, church, divorce support groups? Maybe some counseling. I like AA because it addresses life issues, spirituality, addiction and community. And its free!
It sounds like you developed alcoholism later in life. If that's the case you probably have a much stronger foundation than you think. You just need some help reconnecting with it.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Hi, unfortunately I'm fairly worthless with regards to helping you with your emotions, but I can assure you that alcohol does indeed make it worse. It helps in the short term, but those emotions and panicky times come back like a freight train. Its hard to ride them out, but necessary. Things do indeed calm down. I'm sorry to hear about your life struggles. You can overcome them. Many of us have.
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
Welcome, Sassy. You are in a good place to get info and support. Frick and thomas11 always have good stuff to say.
Peek around and see what resonates with you- under the Newcomers Daily Support Threads you can find a lot of good stuff, including a "Month of Nov" if you are looking to quit or consider it now.
I will also agree that alcohol makes nothing better, and for an alcoholic it makes everything worse.
Good luck. Hope to see you around.
Peek around and see what resonates with you- under the Newcomers Daily Support Threads you can find a lot of good stuff, including a "Month of Nov" if you are looking to quit or consider it now.
I will also agree that alcohol makes nothing better, and for an alcoholic it makes everything worse.
Good luck. Hope to see you around.
sober style
Join Date: May 2016
Location: San Antonio
Posts: 2,388
Hang in there, SassyGrace. Those first few days are rough for everybody, but it does get easier over time. SR is always here when you want to talk about how you're feeling. We've all been where you are now and understand.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: middle of nowhere
Posts: 2,849
Hi sassygrace 
The only way to stop these feelings is to go through them. They will get better with time.
Do you have a plan or program you're working?
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
Do you have any sober supports you could call?
As long as you're here you'll always have support too, post as much as you need and read around. Hang in there!!
The only way to stop these feelings is to go through them. They will get better with time.
Do you have a plan or program you're working?
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
Do you have any sober supports you could call?
As long as you're here you'll always have support too, post as much as you need and read around. Hang in there!!
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
Hi sassy
Have you considered that being numb might not be the ideal state here?
Sometimes things are hard going, but in getting through those things sober, I've grown as a person, in a way I didn't in the 20 years beforehand where I numbed myself out.
Being strong too is something I've only learned in recovery. The only way to grow muscles to to have something to push against.
Numbing myself out was the path of least resistance and, looking back, that made me the very opposite of strong?
D
I know I use alcohol to numb and feel "strong".
Sometimes things are hard going, but in getting through those things sober, I've grown as a person, in a way I didn't in the 20 years beforehand where I numbed myself out.
Being strong too is something I've only learned in recovery. The only way to grow muscles to to have something to push against.
Numbing myself out was the path of least resistance and, looking back, that made me the very opposite of strong?
D
Member
Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: CA
Posts: 967
It's important to somehow find a way to sit through the distress. Breathe, stretch, do whatever you can. Reading helps me. It's difficult, I know. But drinking will only make things worse as you know. Good luck!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
Originally Posted by Sassygrace 
I was not a drinker growing up. I'm 53 now. Why???
I have also heard of some that during their lives never had a problem with drinking and then all of a sudden hit the bottle hard in their later years and suffer much.
There are so many different cases of the drunk to be found.
Two questions -
Has alcohol ceased to be a luxury ?
And now become an nessessity ?
If so, best for us to stay sober.
M-Bob
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