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Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 4
New to the forum
I have been trying to quit drinking with sincerity for about a year but haven't seemed to make it past a couple of weeks at a time. I have a sincere desire to quit, and a supportive spouse and family, so I don't understand why I can't do this. I've tried AA, counseling, even psychiatric hospitalization after attempting suicide due largely to my drinking (you'd think THAT would have snapped me out of it . . . )
I'm at risk of losing my wife, my house, and my job, yet once the desire to drink plants itself in my brain, the only thing I can think of is how to drink and hide it from my family instead of what it's going to do to my family.
Getting past the first few weeks seems almost impossible. Does it get any easier to stay sober? If so, when . . .
Thanks,
-E
I'm at risk of losing my wife, my house, and my job, yet once the desire to drink plants itself in my brain, the only thing I can think of is how to drink and hide it from my family instead of what it's going to do to my family.
Getting past the first few weeks seems almost impossible. Does it get any easier to stay sober? If so, when . . .
Thanks,
-E
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,784
Welcome! 
Yes, it does get easier to stay sober but it takes time to get to that point. I found it getting easier when I got to six months sober. I thought about drinking much less and felt more comfortable in sobriety.
Stick around and post a lot. If you feel like drinking, come here and tell on yourself and we'll help talk you out of it.
Yes, it does get easier to stay sober but it takes time to get to that point. I found it getting easier when I got to six months sober. I thought about drinking much less and felt more comfortable in sobriety.Stick around and post a lot. If you feel like drinking, come here and tell on yourself and we'll help talk you out of it.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,514
Welcome!
The first few weeks will likely be tough, but each time you get through a craving, it does seem to make the next time easier. Try to focus on getting through each day. If you have alcohol in the house, get rid of it and don't buy more. Distract yourself in any way possible. You can do this!
The first few weeks will likely be tough, but each time you get through a craving, it does seem to make the next time easier. Try to focus on getting through each day. If you have alcohol in the house, get rid of it and don't buy more. Distract yourself in any way possible. You can do this!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Southern Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1,618
Greetings and welcome!
You are certainly not alone at all in your struggles. Stick around SR...we are a great, supportive bunch and this forum has served as a very valuable tool in many peoples "Recovery Toolkit" and plan.
That would be the first thing to do, my friend. Make a PLAN for your sobriety. How are you going to stay sober, even after the first week or two?
You are certainly not alone at all in your struggles. Stick around SR...we are a great, supportive bunch and this forum has served as a very valuable tool in many peoples "Recovery Toolkit" and plan.
That would be the first thing to do, my friend. Make a PLAN for your sobriety. How are you going to stay sober, even after the first week or two?
saoutchik
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,205
Welcome to SR TwoDogDad
It is not easy, if it were then more people would do it. At the start even a month seems an impossibly long time to go without a drink but once you can get a calender month behind you it really gives you something that you don't want to throw away
It does get easier after this but only imperceptibly as our brain gets used to not receiving it's fix
Have a good look round the site and try to pick up as many helpful bits of information as you can
Having a plan for when the cravings strike is essential in my opinion, I know that I could not do it by just "white knuckling"
Very best wishes to you
It is not easy, if it were then more people would do it. At the start even a month seems an impossibly long time to go without a drink but once you can get a calender month behind you it really gives you something that you don't want to throw away
It does get easier after this but only imperceptibly as our brain gets used to not receiving it's fix
Have a good look round the site and try to pick up as many helpful bits of information as you can
Having a plan for when the cravings strike is essential in my opinion, I know that I could not do it by just "white knuckling"
Very best wishes to you
AA Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: Silicon Valley
Posts: 2,983
Originally Posted by TwoDogDad 
I've tried AA,
got a higher power
did the steps under the guidance of a sponsor
got active in service (helping others)
God bless
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: Fleeing Temptation in PTZ
Posts: 168
We 7% US alcoholic addictive personalities are a minority.. The other 93% aren't so challenged.
It takes FOCUSED REPETITION TO SHUN EUPHORIA and ENJOY SOBER LIFE!
I and many here where like you.. At the beginnings of our 'education'.. Now I'm amazed that I shun abuse, and am much stronger.
What do you think about a year in jail? Would that help you enjoy natural freedom?
.
.
It takes FOCUSED REPETITION TO SHUN EUPHORIA and ENJOY SOBER LIFE!
I and many here where like you.. At the beginnings of our 'education'.. Now I'm amazed that I shun abuse, and am much stronger.
What do you think about a year in jail? Would that help you enjoy natural freedom?
.
.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: Europe
Posts: 793
I found once I started, little goals started adding up quickly, so 5 days, then a week, then 10 days, then 2 weeks, etc... Soon you start getting into the 20's - just finishing 25 days today and you have a little total you don't want to give up.
The initial physical stuff has passed and I seem to have gotten a bit better at thinking about what I going to do before I get to somewhere with alcohol involved.
It's not a picnic, but it's way easier than the first couple of days.
The initial physical stuff has passed and I seem to have gotten a bit better at thinking about what I going to do before I get to somewhere with alcohol involved.
It's not a picnic, but it's way easier than the first couple of days.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 4
Thank you everyone. My psychiatrist once told me that it takes your brain about 200 repetitions before a change becomes engrained. So, I've only got to turn down a craving to drink another 199 times before I start to make progress, I guess
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,574
Hi TwoDogDad - it's so good to have you with us. It really helped me to be here. I found the courage to stop after drinking almost 30 yrs.
Yes, in the beginning it's so hard - we feel disoriented, like something's missing. Even though I knew drinking could never be fun for me again, I was resentful & felt sorry for myself. Gradually the feeling of freedom took over - I was so happy to not be trapped in that horrible cycle any more. Hope and enthusiasm for the future won - and I rarely think of drinking now. So it does get easier - don't lose heart.
Yes, in the beginning it's so hard - we feel disoriented, like something's missing. Even though I knew drinking could never be fun for me again, I was resentful & felt sorry for myself. Gradually the feeling of freedom took over - I was so happy to not be trapped in that horrible cycle any more. Hope and enthusiasm for the future won - and I rarely think of drinking now. So it does get easier - don't lose heart.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: Abbotsford, BC
Posts: 4
😊
There are fantastic apps for your phone that tracks your sober time, celebrates your milestones and has messages of encouragement. The one I use is for Android and it's called Sober tool.
I'm almost at 4 months now. Longest ever in 11 years. Last year I had 44 days, but white knuckling it the whole time. Other than that I binged drank myself for at least two days straight a week. Sometimes longer. **Sigh**.
I've found the app extremely helpful. Especially when my mind starts to try to seduce me into wanting to drink.
I'm going to start going to an all woman's AA group this week. Other than feeling chronically tired, it gets lonely.
One day at a time. I feel great not drinking. I think I'm finally at the point where I am Ok with this new life. Lot's of unwanted reflection, uncomfortable feelings, tears, regret, remorse, feeling of so much time wasted, etc... It certainly beats the alternative. It was a bit tough around the 90 day mark, but the app helped, and finding this site was extremely helpful. I'm all good again.
Good luck. Keep plunking along.
I'm almost at 4 months now. Longest ever in 11 years. Last year I had 44 days, but white knuckling it the whole time. Other than that I binged drank myself for at least two days straight a week. Sometimes longer. **Sigh**.
I've found the app extremely helpful. Especially when my mind starts to try to seduce me into wanting to drink.
I'm going to start going to an all woman's AA group this week. Other than feeling chronically tired, it gets lonely.
One day at a time. I feel great not drinking. I think I'm finally at the point where I am Ok with this new life. Lot's of unwanted reflection, uncomfortable feelings, tears, regret, remorse, feeling of so much time wasted, etc... It certainly beats the alternative. It was a bit tough around the 90 day mark, but the app helped, and finding this site was extremely helpful. I'm all good again.
Good luck. Keep plunking along.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: Palm Coast, FL
Posts: 152
You guys are amazing. Keep going TwoDogDad...
You CAN do this...I know it is hard to SUSTAIN...but it is also hard to stay away from it for 1 day and you have shown the ability to do that...
I was drinking anywhere from 6-13 beers daily 7 days a week for YEARS.
It was just what I did. And I drink them FAST...so from 5-9 every night I could hit it pretty hard and then go to bed for another night of lousy sleep.
Day 8 was today. Have not really missed those 72 beers I would have drank over 8 days
Good luck and try to get a mental picture of a happy sober successful new you.
You CAN do this...I know it is hard to SUSTAIN...but it is also hard to stay away from it for 1 day and you have shown the ability to do that...
I was drinking anywhere from 6-13 beers daily 7 days a week for YEARS.
It was just what I did. And I drink them FAST...so from 5-9 every night I could hit it pretty hard and then go to bed for another night of lousy sleep.
Day 8 was today. Have not really missed those 72 beers I would have drank over 8 days
Good luck and try to get a mental picture of a happy sober successful new you.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 4
Day 2 almost over and still foggy headed but soooo much better than yesterday. I've decided to team up with a therapist who specializes in EMDR therapy during this effort to get sober, and I start my first session tomorrow night. I'll report back after.
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