Scared1234

I really dont know what to write but I'm just here to check in and say hi! I haven't returned to bottle or anything...but my days have been challenging.

I am realizing that life without alcohol means experiences and feelings are magnified. Where as in the past I could handle a lot of stress because I knew the drink was waiting at the end of the night, now i find myself having to cope with the issue as soon as it arises instead of putting it off for alcohol. I find myself incredibly fragile emotionally, spiritually, and to put it bluntly, I feel completely out of it 24/7 and the butterflies in my stomach are hard to cope with throughout the day.

What am I doing to help myself you ask?

Dietting, Gym, and a psychiatrist once a week until I feel somewhat grounded again.

So I sit here typing this sorta happy and sorta super bummed. I feel like a used up sack of sh*t and the worst part is my brain seems to be hurting the most.

january161992

my life got really painful in early sobriety

it was the kick in the butt i needed to actually get a program beyond just going to meetings

it meant sponsor, steps, service and higher power

that's recovery

PurpleKnight

Hey Scared, Sobriety was definitly a journey for me, so many new experiences.

But it does get better with more time, hang in there!!

Julia8

Just want to send you some hugs, Scared1234! Keep moving forward....

Dee74

Early recovery is hard - but it's not the way it's always going to be scared

why not post a little more regularly - get some support?

D

MythOfSisyphus

In the early part of sobriety things are disorienting. It's like playing a video game with a bunch of "cheat codes" then being forced to play without them. It doesn't seem like you'll be able to do it without the cheats. But life eventually smooths out. That doesn't mean there won't be problems- life is full of them. It's just that the longer you live without using booze as a crutch the better you'll get at working out life's problems.