Your Nar-Anon meeting's structure?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Wilmington, DE
Posts: 393
Your Nar-Anon meeting's structure?
I am curious as to how the various Nar-Anon meetings are structured around the country. This is idle curiosity, I'm not upset or disgruntled with my home group's structure.
My group "has no leaders" as per the Nar-Anon philosophy. We pass a calendar around the group every month or so and ask for people to sign up to chair - no requirements, or experience necessary - just a willingness to chair a meeting.
Our meeting is relatively small with 15 to 25 people being the norm. We are always arranged in a circle (with a tissue box in the center, just in case).
The first meeting of the month is a speaker meeting (could be Nar-Anon, NA, or AA - usually NA); the third meeting of the month is a Step meeting which will have a speaker to lead the meeting who has completed that Step (January = Step 1, February = Step 2, etc.); second, fourth and fifth will all be discussion meetings. There is always time held out for sharing at ALL meetings if a person is "in crisis".
I, and many others in our group, find the NA speakers very helpful - they help us get inside of our addict's brain and understand addiction a little better from the addict's point of view; perhaps more importantly they provide hope, especially to the newcomers that some folks do find lasting sobriety - our speaker last night was 4 years clean - she was awesome!
Our discussion meetings are generally kicked off by that evening's chairperson sharing - sometime they request that we go around the circle in order to share - passing is always permissible, and once the circle has been completed those who passed are invited to share if they would like - not singled out, but an open invitation. Other discussion meetings are just thrown open to the floor from the start by the chairperson and there is no order of speakers - my favorite format for discussion.
We do have elected officers for the purposes of the business end of the group. Only 4 elected positions - Chairperson (for the business meeting only), Treasurer, Literature person, and Secretary who maintains the phone list and takes minutes at the monthly business meeting. Our business meetings are announced a week in advance, are open to all, are held immediately following the regular meeting and generally last 10 - 15 minutes or less. In addition, we have a GSR and and alternate GSR.
We are pretty flexible as to the meeting duration - published is 7:00 to 8:00 but we sometimes go over, sometimes w-a-y over. It is announced at the start of the meeting that if you need to leave because of other issues, that is OK and we will not "hold it against you." We always have a "meeting after the meeting" which is usually very well attended and sometimes resumes in the parking lot of the church where we meet.
So, does this sound familiar, or are we oddballs?
Keep coming back,
Jim
My group "has no leaders" as per the Nar-Anon philosophy. We pass a calendar around the group every month or so and ask for people to sign up to chair - no requirements, or experience necessary - just a willingness to chair a meeting.
Our meeting is relatively small with 15 to 25 people being the norm. We are always arranged in a circle (with a tissue box in the center, just in case).
The first meeting of the month is a speaker meeting (could be Nar-Anon, NA, or AA - usually NA); the third meeting of the month is a Step meeting which will have a speaker to lead the meeting who has completed that Step (January = Step 1, February = Step 2, etc.); second, fourth and fifth will all be discussion meetings. There is always time held out for sharing at ALL meetings if a person is "in crisis".
I, and many others in our group, find the NA speakers very helpful - they help us get inside of our addict's brain and understand addiction a little better from the addict's point of view; perhaps more importantly they provide hope, especially to the newcomers that some folks do find lasting sobriety - our speaker last night was 4 years clean - she was awesome!
Our discussion meetings are generally kicked off by that evening's chairperson sharing - sometime they request that we go around the circle in order to share - passing is always permissible, and once the circle has been completed those who passed are invited to share if they would like - not singled out, but an open invitation. Other discussion meetings are just thrown open to the floor from the start by the chairperson and there is no order of speakers - my favorite format for discussion.
We do have elected officers for the purposes of the business end of the group. Only 4 elected positions - Chairperson (for the business meeting only), Treasurer, Literature person, and Secretary who maintains the phone list and takes minutes at the monthly business meeting. Our business meetings are announced a week in advance, are open to all, are held immediately following the regular meeting and generally last 10 - 15 minutes or less. In addition, we have a GSR and and alternate GSR.
We are pretty flexible as to the meeting duration - published is 7:00 to 8:00 but we sometimes go over, sometimes w-a-y over. It is announced at the start of the meeting that if you need to leave because of other issues, that is OK and we will not "hold it against you." We always have a "meeting after the meeting" which is usually very well attended and sometimes resumes in the parking lot of the church where we meet.
So, does this sound familiar, or are we oddballs?
Keep coming back,
Jim
upholding both the steps and traditions, without a lot of in-fighting or egos.
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
My home group was CoDA, Jim, but structured much the same. We had a time each meeting when we would split into groups of maybe 5 or 6 and each share something that was on their mind, usually in a brief time frame of about 5 minutes each...or pass if they chose not to share that night. It was a group of about 25-30 like yours, so splitting into smaller groups gave everyone a chance to share in a timely way.
We had a "no crosstalk" policy, meaning a person sharing was not interrupted so they could just talk it out and if advice was requested, that was usually arranged for after the meeting. It's amazing what you can work out yourself when sharing with people just listening and caring but not jumping in with their own story or telling you what to do.
I hope I am not diverting from the purpose of your thread here, but I think it's good for newcomers to grasp a little of how meetings work. No matter which fellowship, I think meetings have helped so many of us here find our balance and build the foundation of a happier, healthier life.
Thanks for this thread, Jim.
Hugs
We had a "no crosstalk" policy, meaning a person sharing was not interrupted so they could just talk it out and if advice was requested, that was usually arranged for after the meeting. It's amazing what you can work out yourself when sharing with people just listening and caring but not jumping in with their own story or telling you what to do.
I hope I am not diverting from the purpose of your thread here, but I think it's good for newcomers to grasp a little of how meetings work. No matter which fellowship, I think meetings have helped so many of us here find our balance and build the foundation of a happier, healthier life.
Thanks for this thread, Jim.
Hugs
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Wilmington, DE
Posts: 393
Ann,
My group and Nar-Anon as a whole has a "no-crosstalk" policy, I just forgot to mention it in my OP. Requested advice is given freely during the "meeting-after-the-meeting". For those who do not understand what I mean by the meeting-after-the-meeting; we always close our meetings by standing, holding hands with whoever is next to you on both sides, then a moment of silence for all those who still suffer from addiction followed by the Serenity Prayer, followed by "Keep coming back, it works if you work it, you're worth it, so work it!" Followed by brief applause.
As soon as the applause is over, people scatter and break into small groups or couples to seek and offer advice, share joyful moments, or whatever. The groups are fairly fluid and frequently people move from group to group as the meeting after the meeting progresses. We have an unwritten agreement with the church where we meet to be out of the facility by 9:00 -- if some are still not finished - some of the groups migrate into the parking lot to continue their conversations.
In our group, about the only time crosstalk is permitted, and fully sanctioned, is when a newcomer gets totally caught up in their apologies for crying while they are sharing. An "old-timer" will assure them that everyone in the room has cried openly here and most of us are repeat offenders, there is no need to apologize or to be embarrassed or ashamed - that is why we keep the tissue box in the middle of our circle.
Rest assured that any person that is in crisis gets plenty of attention and extra hugs after the meeting.
Keep coming back,
Jim
My group and Nar-Anon as a whole has a "no-crosstalk" policy, I just forgot to mention it in my OP. Requested advice is given freely during the "meeting-after-the-meeting". For those who do not understand what I mean by the meeting-after-the-meeting; we always close our meetings by standing, holding hands with whoever is next to you on both sides, then a moment of silence for all those who still suffer from addiction followed by the Serenity Prayer, followed by "Keep coming back, it works if you work it, you're worth it, so work it!" Followed by brief applause.
As soon as the applause is over, people scatter and break into small groups or couples to seek and offer advice, share joyful moments, or whatever. The groups are fairly fluid and frequently people move from group to group as the meeting after the meeting progresses. We have an unwritten agreement with the church where we meet to be out of the facility by 9:00 -- if some are still not finished - some of the groups migrate into the parking lot to continue their conversations.
In our group, about the only time crosstalk is permitted, and fully sanctioned, is when a newcomer gets totally caught up in their apologies for crying while they are sharing. An "old-timer" will assure them that everyone in the room has cried openly here and most of us are repeat offenders, there is no need to apologize or to be embarrassed or ashamed - that is why we keep the tissue box in the middle of our circle.
Rest assured that any person that is in crisis gets plenty of attention and extra hugs after the meeting.
Keep coming back,
Jim
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 635
The Naranon meetings I went to followed a similar format. They were helpful, but I now attend Celebrate Recovery instead. I love that our CR does a free meal (at least during the summer- in other seasons they charge $1 per child, $3 per adult) and I especially love the live music before the lesson or speaker. I think singing is so helpful. Of course, all of our music is Christ-centered- but I could imagine any uplifting music would be just as helpful in Nar-anon.
Anyway, it seems to work for many just the way it is, and that's what it's all about.
Anyway, it seems to work for many just the way it is, and that's what it's all about.
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