MacW

There have been literally dozens of day 5's for me over the years. Not too many day 6's though.

By day 5 I am over the physical and psychological withdrawal, so I am feeling pretty good. I'll usually have been paid by one client or another, so will have money in the bank again.

I'll wake up, kinda happy. Ready to face the world. And then I head off to get some social interaction on this lovely day. I'm feeling great, I want some stimulating company and good conversation. So I end up in a bar.

Or I might decide to treat myself to a nice meal in one of my favorite restaurants. One glass of wine won't hurt will it? Never ends there though.

The dangers are myriad, and I've failed on day 5 so many times its not funny.

Anyone else find day 5 a complete nightmare?

Mac

Endeavor

This is a great question MacW, because it's so true.

In the past I've taken many breaks and at day 5, something great and equally terrible happens. The physical effects are gone, feeling good, sleeping well, and doing fantastic work. So we figure, what the hell, why not reward myself; I'm doing a great job right? Bah!

That's the moment of weakness disguised as confidence that sends most of us down a hole; whilst starting a new bottle collection.

Stay strong and remember bud, we make a decision to drink. Every day and passing week you decide not to, you are choosing to live your life to full potential.

It's something I myself try very hard to keep in check. Isn't it wild though, how much better we feel, look and succeed; when we're not getting pissed? I'm beginning to see and feel the difference, after 2 weeks since my last bad decision.

The path down the hole comes from consistent drinking. When you feel like total crap all the time, it effects others and you're level of thinking is in the dirt. Maybe we make a mistake at day 5 because there hasn't been enough time to get our heads straight. The path to better living has a gentle upward slope. When we walk it enough, we can look back and clearly see how much higher we are.

Here's to waking up from the nightmare.

Best,

MacW

Oh yes it's very different. I actually managed 2 months dry just before I got in to my latest episode about a month back. Life was amazing. I was happy. I was making good money. I had started playing guitar again with a local band. I had rebuilt my business. My Son was back in private school instead of state school. My ex-wife was even on speaking terms!

A month later I'm on my arse, flat broke in a different country.

Last time though, mark my words.

Endeavor

You are I are sailing in the same ship my friend.

MacW

Time we got off it eh?

Jsbodhi

It's usually day 3-5 for me- once I start feeling good again xoxo
Keep pushing through

Soberwolf

Stick close to us Mac & try this

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-cravings.html

doggonecarl

I don't recall which day was the nightmare day. But I can relate to "forgetting" why I had quit drinking, or talking myself back into drinking.

Until this last time. Sobriety stuck.

Failure at day five doesn't have to be a self-fulfilling prophecy. Read your first post. Remember why you came here. Reaffirm your decision to quit and your commitment to recovery

MacW

Thanks Soberwolf, it's actually been really easy this time around, and I am pretty confident that it's going to be OK.

I've had some incredible inspiration today. I met a young woman a while back, and although I've been drunk on several occasions when I have met her in the past, it was pretty early on in the day, long before I was uncontrollably drunk. We also both speak a common language but it is not either of our native languages. So that probably helped cover it up as well.

Anyway, we have become really close. Much to my amazement. Last 7 years I have lived alone, single. Didn't want anyone around.

Today we are sitting around watching some crazy funny video, having good fun. And suddenly she goes very quiet. I look over, and there are two little tears running down her cheeks. Is ask what's wrong? She says, "I feel like I have been waiting for you all my life, but I don't think you will be around long."

She has absolutely no idea how profound of a comment that was from my drinking point of view. If I don't quit there is only one final resolution.

Funny thing is, just the day before we got close, I woke up on the floor of my hotel room, still half drunk from the night before, and lay there crying, just wishing there was somebody to help me. First time I ever wanted help, first time I ever thought I needed it. The day I decided that I have to quit, and do it properly this time. The day I joined this forum (and met all you lovely people).

The next day something walks back in to my life that I thought I would never see again.

Strange how life works out sometimes.

biminiblue

I actually said, "What?" out loud when I read this.

I don't remember the conversations the next day when I'm drinking. Now that I'm sober, I don't even like talking to people who have had a drink. They are obtuse and repetitive.

Day 5 was no easier or harder than any other day for me. Putting that kind of trigger into the process just justifies any and every other trigger to drink again.

There is nothing, no one, no situation that can lead me back to that dark place I was in on the day I quit. Day 5? I didn't feel like my pre-drinking self for nearly a year. Sure, Day 5 was full of anxiety and I felt better physically than the previous couple days, but I was no where near healed...even though I was already patting myself on the back. More will be revealed.

MacW

I don't go out looking get into a conversation with a drunkard, even if one of them is me. Always seems to end up that way though.