Smilax

Was just ruminating on this as I'm feeling unusually up at the start of the day today. Of course when things are going bad you want to burry your feelings, numb yourself. But then on the flip side also nothing beats happy contented drunk. And in this way every emotional state leads you to want to drink. Sad, burry it with drink, Happy? Heighten it with drink. Angry, wash it away with drink. Jealous , drink to forget.

JD

Yeah, it's easy to find an excuse to drink. But that's not the way you stay sober.

Berrybean

Yes. That's why recovery programs are so helpful. To learn new and better ways of dealing with those feelings. ☺

Centered3

One of the most important things I've learned in my recovery is to just let my feelings be....to feel them, to not run away from them, to not fear them, and to know that they are just feelings; nothing else.

I also had no idea I was not only having trouble with negative feelings, but with positive ones, too.

Just the other day my therapist said to me: FEAR = FEEL Everything And Recover.

My step work has also helped me a lot with dealing with feelings and what to do (and not do) about them.

ScottFromWI

I'd disagree with that. Being sober beats being drunk any day in my book. In the end stages of my drinking I simply drank to avoid withdrawals. I was far from "happy or content" when I was drinking. Our addiction would love to have us believe that, but it's really just BS.

Darwinia

"Contented drunk" is just a figment of our drunk imagination.

TryTryAgain68

Scott - thanks for that post! I am experiencing the same thing now. I don't even look forward to a drink but I have it to get over the hangover. And , of course, I don't stop at one. So the next day it's the same thing all over again!

I've never posted here but have been getting lots of encouragement from all of you for about a year and a half. I'm much older than you folks (I just turned 70) and I'm desperately hoping it's not too late to save my liver and kidneys and give me a few mores to enjoy life soberly! Thanks again for your post. It is so encouraging to know your were where I am and made it through.

EndGameNYC

And every drink leads to another drink, more misery, and more destruction.

Many of us have found that being actively involved in therapy or other types of treatment helps us to get through unwanted emotional states. We cannot learn to manage difficult emotions without working through them. Sober.

There's no reason to go through this on your own.

freshstart57

One way or another, we learn to sit with our feelings and accept them. That is where peace will be found. It really is that simple.

ScottFromWI

Welcome to SR! Glad you decided to post - and it's definitely not too late. There are plenty of folks here that are "your age" - but in the end age doesn't matter, the best time to quit is now.

And you are right, our addiction/AV never reminds us of the bad things that come along with drinking. Certainly most of us at one point in our lives did get an "escape" when we drank, but of course it's short lived and eventually just goes away. Our AV always conveniently forgets the dry heaves, splitting headaches, drunk phone calls/texts/posts, and ( insert other bad consequence here )

AnvilheadII

addiction turns the ESCAPE into the PRISON.

and if we really think about it....it wasn't a GOOD day or BAD day that spurred on the drinking, that was just the handy excuse....it was also

Monday
Tuesday
Wednesday
Flag Day
Garbage Day
Today
Time to clean the cat box day
Payday
Yesterday........................

madgirl

I feel like alcohol use stunted my emotional development as a person, and now I am playing "catch up". Drinking augmented depression for me and impaired my ability to see things and situations clearly.

Berrybean

Yes. I constantly found (and still do occasionally find) myself learning little things about life, and behaving, and being, that most people seemed to have learned in their late teens and early 20's. In my late 20's I went to Cambridge university and did a BA followed by a post graduate course. It took 4 years. I sincerely maintain that I learned more of value to my life and how I live it in 18 months of working the steps with a sponsor than I did in 4 years at uni. If i had to go back in time and choose just one of those things to keep the same, the recovery work would win hands down.

sleepie

Agreed Smilax, drinking to make a good thing better was almost more of a threat than drinking because I felt bad. As you said, heightening, or enhancing. it is good to identify that as you can now see it is a trigger, one to watch out for