How Do You Get Moving?
How Do You Get Moving?
I am feeling a sense of inertia today. Is this how you feel at 10 months and some change sober? I don't know. I had this issue from time to time before I ever had a 'problem'.
I slept well, but was relieved to wake up to find my dream was just a dream. Got up, ate breakfast, washed my face, brushed my teeth read my book and then tried to start doing some chores around the house, just to find myself not knowing where to start and feeling a bit overwhelmed by all that I need to get done....AND just generally speaking lacking the 'spark' or energy to DIG IN. What's wrong with me?! I used to be able to clean my whole house in just a few hours. These days, just doing the dishes feels like a major accomplishment.
If my dad was still alive I might call him up. He always cheered me up. Why? One reason was his overall philosophy on life. It was a philosophy based upon his overall experience. Raising five kids. Being faithful to one woman. Keeping the ranch up. Recovering from a traumatic childhood. Recovering from alcohol. Not getting freaked out about the weather, BUT knowing that you had to put up hay when the weather cooperated. Not depending on the weather to be just so, but knowing you had absolutely no control over what weather might come. 'Take it as it comes', so to speak. He would encourage me to basically relax....you've got everything you really need......(right?)
I slept well, but was relieved to wake up to find my dream was just a dream. Got up, ate breakfast, washed my face, brushed my teeth read my book and then tried to start doing some chores around the house, just to find myself not knowing where to start and feeling a bit overwhelmed by all that I need to get done....AND just generally speaking lacking the 'spark' or energy to DIG IN. What's wrong with me?! I used to be able to clean my whole house in just a few hours. These days, just doing the dishes feels like a major accomplishment.
If my dad was still alive I might call him up. He always cheered me up. Why? One reason was his overall philosophy on life. It was a philosophy based upon his overall experience. Raising five kids. Being faithful to one woman. Keeping the ranch up. Recovering from a traumatic childhood. Recovering from alcohol. Not getting freaked out about the weather, BUT knowing that you had to put up hay when the weather cooperated. Not depending on the weather to be just so, but knowing you had absolutely no control over what weather might come. 'Take it as it comes', so to speak. He would encourage me to basically relax....you've got everything you really need......(right?)
Well, I was bored last night, but it passed uneventfully. I don't know what I'm lacking really....it could be a recovery thing. I have all these things in mind that I WANT to do and some other things that I NEED to do (like practice my music). The job's going fine and the bills are all paid. When I was a kid I always had some sort of project going onand I maybe that made me feel productive. I used to sew a lot, read a lot, play outside a lot, ride horses a lot, hike, swim, pick huckleberries, help around the ranch, spend hours observing animals...idk...maybe I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill
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