csaw1112

My addiction, like anyone else's I assume, brought with it a variety of other bad habits. I have an overall slobbishness about me now that I didnt seem to have before drinking (Ive been an alcoholic my ENTIRE adult life).(which brings up a whole other topic but not now).I'm not completely lazy, I work long hours and take care of the more important household tasks. The lesser important things I neglect almost completely (letting dirty dishes pile up for days, trash can overflow into the floor, things growing in the shower etc.)
I guess my question is: as I mature in my sobriety, will this automatically fix itself, or at least be much easier to overcome, or is this a completely different issue that I will have to face as a non-drinker?

Ariesagain

I find that being sober I have much less inertia...I tend to grab a sponge, bag up the trash, and just get to it instead of letting it add to my mental tally of failings. It's very satisfying.

Now that our house is for sale, this is coming in handy, although I sometimes have trouble knowing when to quit cleaning!

Berrybean

Like staying sober, I suppose it will change once you make the decision that you are going to change it.

I spent my first 6 months of sobriety sitting there waiting for things to just happen, until I recognised that it was down to me to be the catalyst for change, by changing what I did and how I did it. All of it. And that's when things really did start changing - for the better.

Wastinglife

I am also a slob. If I'm drinking, I don't care how messy my place is and if I'm hungover for days after drinking, Im too miserable to clean. I have ADHD so mindless chores are difficult for me to focus on for long and I tend to get overwhelmed by a long cleanup task. I'm much better if I'm completely sober for a while.

gettingsmarter

I have gotten much much better. I used to be so lazy from either being drunk or hungover I would actually put a trash bag over my festering dishes so I wouldn't have to look at them. Now I actually care and enjoy getting the job done.

ScottFromWI

I don't think anything in life "automatically fixes itself". Having said that, if part of your sobriety plan is looking at the other areas of your life and proactively addressing issues, then yes - sobriety will take care of a lot of them.

In a sense, you've already begun the process of "fixing" this trait by identifying it. You know it's an issue so now you can find a way to correct it.

GnikNus

I think things will get easier in that department. Having the mental and physical energy to do what needs to be done has been one of the benefits of sobriety for me. As soon as something is dirty or out of place, I proactively take care of it- instead of letting it go like I used to in my drinking days.

vulturine

You'll feel better with a clean place to come home to. I noticed that I let things go while I was drinking, but when I sobered up for a few years, my place was spotless, and I could concentrate on making my space into somewhere I wanted to be.

hopeful4

I am just guessing here, but I would think there is a lot more motivation to have a nice, neat place when you are sober. Pride in ownership of your space that is just not a priority if you are in a bad place.

That is just a guess as drinking is not my issue, and I am a pretty neat person by nature.

Ruby2

My house was a disaster area when I was still drinking. It isn't a whole lot better nowadays because my two children are slobs. But, it is better. I used to leave the dishes sitting in the sink and all over the counter and sometimes on the floor. Nothing was clean.

Sometimes I find it overwhelming to start a clear away. What helps me is to start with one task. One thing. Get that done and relax. Go on to the next. I make sure that every night the dishes are put away, dirty go into the dishwasher - which I didn't have when I was drinking so hand washing mounds of dishes may have contributed to my laziness. I wash the counters off.

I sweep my floors every night. Kid mess.

I'm still not great about cleaning the bathroom or taking out the garbage but it's progress, not perfection. You'll get there.

whiteturtle

I could have written your post word for word, csaw. I used to be an incredibly organized person, and took a lot of pride in it. The last few years, however, when my drinking has escalated, have been horrible. Currently I am facing the daunting task of literally reorganizing/sorting/cleaning every last thing in the apartment. It's rather horrifying. I am hoping now that I am sober I will have the energy to actually get started on it.

entropy1964

I don't find that any of my behaviors or thoughts fix themselves. I have to make a conscious decision.

Have you tried making a list of all the things you need to do, divide the list by 7 and do that number each day? More than likely it won't be more than 4-5 actions per day.

Water441

I'm full on depressed when I'm drinking. Just lay in my bed all day and night. I don't want to do anything except be in my bed.

Bunny211

I changed SO MUCH when it came to caring for my surroundings. I was not a slob I was THE SLOB. I lived in utter filth. At the end of my drinking my apartment was a disaster area. There was puke on the carpet, in the sink, dirty dishes everywhere. Many times I actually threw dishes out rather than wash them. My clothes were everywhere. I could NEVER, EVER invite anyone into my house. Now, at a year sober, things have changed so much. I keep my surroundings neat and clean. I don't make my bed every day. But my sheets are clean. My floor vacuumed and mopped 2ce a week, my bathroom clean, my dirty laundry in the hamper, my dishes washed right away and not left in the sink etc.

Early on my sponsor helped me clean out my car. I had bags of stuff everywhere. I had brand new clothes from TJ Maxx stuffed in a bag with old pizza crusts. My friend once sat in my car and said "Why is there toast in your running sneakers?" Haha. My sponsor sat with me while I opened and inventoried every single bag from my car. One by one.

At first keeping things clean seemed daunting. Now it is just a habit. I finish eating and I go put my dishes in the dish washer. I just do it automatically. When I have a few free minutes I clean the toilet and sink and swiffer the floor.

"Water the flowers in your garden" is what my sponsor tells me. Meaning care for yourself and your surroundings. You do end up feeling so much better about yourself. I always felt like a complete failure and a slob...totally worthless that I could not keep my surroundings clean.

People used to call me "Pigpen" from Charlie Brown. Now my house is clean and should someone arrive at any time for a visit, I'll never be ashamed to invite them in for a cup of coffee.

MissPerfumado

It's not an automatic transformation from slob to Martha Stewart just because you're sober but it becomes a lot easier to be tidy if you're not drunk or hungover all the time. I did a big declutter spread over a few weekends, once I had a couple months' sober time. I had a lot of new free time on my hands and my energy had returned so it made sense. And from then on staying tidy has been a lot easier. You could look upon the tidy up as a project once you feel up to it.

Cherrybreeze

This post is so me. Dishes, clothes, trash, growing shower specimens, all of it.

I believe it will get easier the more sober time I get. I've been working on another project that has kept me from really deep cleaning, but I have more motivation to get things done in general.

bluedog97

I'm a slob too. I wondered if I was a slob because I was drinking or if I was just inherently one. Since I quit, things have gotten better, but certainly not spotless. I figure when I get ready I'll make the effort to turn it around.

blueberry2015

Im... getting there.... S l o w l y tho. Im starting to see things which need doing in the home which before I just simply didnt notice at all in my warped drunken mind. I really do need to put more of an effort in tho, and make myself do things without being asked or til it gets really noticable. I still find the washing basket completely overwheming. Husband does the washing..... Nuts eh?!

uncorked

Many times I actually threw dishes out rather than wash them.

Bunny, your post made me laugh! I haven't done that with dishes but sometimes I want to with socks! lol!

csaw1112

I've thrown out dishes too, because i was scared to ever eat off them again lol