tommyc10

Hi,
So I stopped on Sunday but was back drinking Monday. Haven't drunk today. How do you keep on going when social life revolves around drink? Feel like I'm hiding.

Coldfusion

Hi Tommy!

I had to learn social things to do without drinking.

If you feel you need help finding a group of people who understands addiction, I suggest going to an AA meeting.

Soberwolf

Hi Tommy I had to change quite a few things what you call hiding I call taking a step away to evaluate I went to meetings group therapy some short college courses

Know that your not doing this alone Tommy

least

Your former social life may have revolved around drinking. You have to build a new social life that doesn't have drinking at the center of it. The key to getting sober is to want to be sober more than you want to drink.

tommyc10

I've organised a social group in my local area, we are going to a restaurant next Thursday, it will be many new people so nervous. That will be a litmus test I feel. But new people means you can be anybody you want to be I guess. It's positive too.

tommyc10

Thanks. We live in a society where drinking is so important it seems. All my family, friends drink and sone drink heavily.

tommyc10

What did you say when someone asked you out for a drink after? How long before you felt stron enough to accept?

Anna

This is one of the hard parts of getting and staying sober. Tough decisions are involved. I had to make changes in people and activities in my life to help support my recovery.

tommyc10

I'm non religious. That's what worries me.

Coldfusion

AA is a spiritual program, but you may find meetings where many of the members are religious. On the other hand, one of the meetings I attend is agnostic.

A few big cities have other secular recovery program meetings. In early recovery, I would suggest going to any meeting as soon as possible because so many have found meetings to be helpful. Just give it a try!

Soberwolf

I simply turned it down it wasn't my thing anymore I wasn't really a pub person anyway Tommy there is so much more to life than drinking stick with us bud & let the magic happen and I promise it will happen

Dee74

Hi Tommy

I had to change my life because my old life revolved around drinking.

For many years that seemed way too immense to consider, but when I did it it really was no problem at all, I wanted to be sober that much.

The funny thing is I thought sober life would be boring and joyless...I love my life now. I could never say that as a drinker.

D

kinzoku

I just had to embrace the fact that I had to go into hiding for a bit. I'm out now, and it was worth it.

Bunny211

Hi Tommy,

A lot of big cities have agnostic AA meetings. Even if where you live does not have them I suggest you give AA a try. Loads of newcomers do not believe in God. Take what can you can from AA and leave the rest. It's really helped me. I've made sober friends and we really do have a lot of fun together. When I got sober I started living. For years all I did was drink. This year I have gone to movies, started taking piano lessons, joined a gym, gone sledding and ice skating, gone on nature walks, gone to the beach etc. Sober life is joyful. You might not see that at first, but if you stick with this life gets so much better!

FormerWineGirl

Hi Tommy, I think what you describe is how we all felt in the beginning. I couldn't imagine doing something as mundane as shopping without drinking, much less try to socialize! But the longer I I was sober, the more I realized just how distorted and twisted that mindset really was.

When you quit drinking, you start to heal. Not just physically, but mentally as well. Your thinking heals, and, as crazy as it may sound to you now, alcohol is no longer the center of the universe. Give it time, you will be amazed!

tommyc10

I stopped smoking 5 years ago (am 35) and replaced that addiction with cake! I think joining a gym will be a bit healthier. Thanks for the advice.

PurpleKnight

What I didn't realise until I quit was that there are soo many people having a great time without alcohol, alcohol doesn't have to be the centre of the social universe and for many it isn't.

The only reason it seemed liked that was because all I did was drink, I went to places with alcohol and hung out with people that drank, so naturally I would think that alcohol was the centre of everything, because that's all I saw.

We need to create a lifestyle compatible with Sobriety, the places we go, the people we hang out with, it can be done!!