blueberry2015

Hi not posted for a lil while. Im still here five weeks today sober. Im feeling lost tbh. Not knowing who I actually am. Burst into tears tonight in AA (again) I dunno, everyone keeps saying I should get a sponsor etc... but tbh before I feel I can embark on the steps I need to address my issues with the help from a professional. The guys in AA are fab but feel I am being told what to do when all I need right now is someone to listen. Like many alcoholics I have some baggage, Im going through some tough emotions right now and I do feel that I need counselling more, due my first assessment with drug and alcohol counselling next week. Im listening to the 12 steps and think I understand them and can see the benefits it has made in others lives, but at the moment everything is a bit over whelming, I just want to get my head around it all and get this counselling I so badly need you know. I am a very confused person at the moment and not knowing my bum from my elbow. Part of me still has my barriers up a lil from letting anyone else in, Im only prepared at the mo to do that with a counsellor.

Anyways I hope your doing ok especially those that got sober a similar time I did, I think of you and wonder how you are doing x

Bird615

Of course everything seems a bit overwhelming. While 5 weeks is wonderful, it is only 5 weeks on the long road to recovery. You sound completely normal to me as far as someone at your point in the journey goes. It's a rollercoaster, at least it was for me as well as a lot of the people I knew that were sobering up with me the first time around.

If you just need someone to listen, a sponsor would be a good start for that, as long as you let them know. You don't have to rush through all the steps right away, although for me, they were what helped me get myself sorted out and start to feel better about myself and being sober.

It's good that you do have your counsellor you can trust for now until you feel ready to tackle more.

sleepie

hi blueberry sorry you are feeling so overwhelmed
I think it is good that you know what you need and can proceed to find a counselor. I hope that you find a good one and congrats on all your sober time so far!

Anna

Blueberry, 5 weeks sober is great! And, I am glad to hear you have plans to see a therapist soon. I do understand things are overwhelming, but what I can tell you is that recovery is a journey. I had a lot of stuff to deal with too, and it doesn't happen overnight. Just keep moving forward and you will begin to heal.

MythOfSisyphus

Keep your chin up, Blueberry! It's pretty normal to feel that way in the first months of sobriety. It does get better. I can't say if you need professional treatment or just AA, but I hope you realize just how big a step you've already made!

Soberwolf

5 Weeks is amazing

Meraviglioso

Wow! 5 weeks is really fantastic. Absolutely go see a therapist if you feel you need someone to talk to. It can make a huge difference for you. Best of luck to you.

blueberry2015

Thank you x I am all over the place emotionally right now, have a lot of issues with my past which I need to come to terms with, I just drank my way through it to avoid feeling the pain, sobreity is making me feel you know Im not used to not blocking it out. Its a tough old ride this sobreity business but one I know I need to do and yup it means dealing with the past fully so that I can heal and move forward x x x thanks for understanding x x x much love x x x

Soberwolf

You are amazing Blue

Soberish

Congratulations on 5 weeks blueberry! I'm only on day 2 right now but I do remember back when I quit the first time. At 5 weeks I still didn't feel 100 percent and I remember thinking I would always feel that way. It did get better, and I just wish I would have not made the mistake of thinking I could use again in moderation.

Good to hear you gave AA a try, but if you think a counselor/therapist would benefit you better than its definitely worth a try.

PurpleKnight

Keep pushing through Blueberry!! 5 Weeks is fantastic!!