want2feelGood

i hope someday i have my last monday day 1. i am so sick of being sick the weekends come and i am lonely so i go out with my boyfriend to meet his friends and its never healthy. i want to be sober, but i will be alone and that makes me sad.

Anna

You can do this.

Why not make plans for this weekend that will not involve drinking? Can you meet up with friends for coffee, go for a hike, have a picnic - something that will change the normal weekend routine.

soberclover

Sounds like you are already lonely even though you have a boyfriend. We are only alone in sobriety if we choose to be. There are a LOT of people who get sober and have their lives change in really big ways. I have found that I needed to learn to be okay alone with myself before I could be healthy with other people.

want2feelGood

yes i will try that. i have tried to make plans to keep me away from unhealthy habits and people. but it never ends up going as i planned. this weekend will be different, it has to be!! there are some movies i want to see. and i will try to go on a hike or walk or bike ride. or just lay by the pool with a book. i am worried it will bore my boyfriend tho and thats why we end up meeting unhealthy friends. my boyfriend says he is willing to do anything, as long as he is with me he is happy whatever we do, he says. but we never break away from unhealthy. it has to change, or i guess i have to leave him and focus on myself, but i will be very very lonely.

Soberintexas007

I had a similar problem. It has been about 10 weeks that I have been unable to stay sober on my husbands days off (Sunday and Monday). But this trend should stop now as I am involved in AA now. It's difficult but possible. Good luck!

newpage119

It sounds like you are not happy now with current boyfriend and drinking.
If you get yourself together, get sober, make some changes in your life.....I am sure you will find someone that makes you happy AND fits in with your new healthy lifestyle!


You will never be happy with someone until you are happy with yourself first!

CaseyW

Quit using the word "try." Start doing! I found when I am active in my recovery it goes a whole lot better.

I'm sorry you're hurting right now but so glad you're right back in here. You've got the right idea, now just make some definite plans and remember you do not have to take that first drink no matter what. I know that's easier said than done, but it's a simple fact that if you don't take that first drink, you won't get drunk. And if you don't spend all weekend hanging around drunks, you stand a lot better chance of not taking that first drink.

There is a better way of life out there. It may involve some hard decisions but it'll be worth it. You can do this!

Wishing you the best...

YuriO

I'm starting over too this Monday. Let's hope that Tuesday is Day 2.

least

Make this your last day one.

YuriO

Alright. You've got it.

emme99

Friday & Saturday are the hardest days for me, so Sunday is usually my day 1. I did finally make it through this last weekend. I spent Saturday night on this site reading. It is hard but you can do it!! Good luck to you.

YuriO

So this is the Last Day One. Already I'm looking for a crutch or cheatsheet to make it by. Just abstain, YuriO. Some people on here have proven it's possible. Be open to change. Especially change for the better. And tomorrow will be the Last Day Two.

Dee74

I think a plan is really important want2. You're in a great position now to have a really terrific plan by next weekend.

there are some really good ideas and tips here:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html

D

Dee74

Welcome to you Yuri - you really can make this the last day one
Check out the link I posted too

D

matilda123

It sounds like you have a good plan. I know it can be really hard in the beginning. It was for me, but now I'm so busy I can't believe I had time to drink on the weekends.If you can, try not to worry too much about what may happen and believe your boyfriend is willing to support you--and take him up on it! You may initially need to stay away from certain friends and places, at least for awhile. Take care!

Berrybean

Weekends were the hardest for me too. Nowadays I love them. I start it with one AA meeting in a neighbouring town which I drive to with my best AA buddy (a lovely sober friend I'd never have met if I didn't go there), try to fit in some sober treats, maybe join BF in pub for an hour or so then come home for treaty dinner and chill time. Sunday I try to see some old sober friends or family that I neglected for the time that I filled my weekends with booze - amazingly some of them were still interested after 20 odd years of neglect.

It's not easy to change habits. But they aren't going to change themselves. That's why people have a sobriety plan. Maybe take a look at some other people's ideas on here so get some ideas that might help you.
Also, maybe check out your local tourist info office for days out nearby.

Sounds to me that you BF might well be willing to do something else, but expects you to come up with some ideas. Give him a chance on this. It's going to take time to find out what you both find fun / boring and it'll be great if you can do this together.

Delilah1

Hope you are doing something healthy and fun for you tonight, and this weekend.:-)

FreeOwl

I remember how dreaded Mondays were.... How the weekend binges led to 'recovery Sunday' where I'd drink and drug just enough to feel OK, tapering my way back to 'readiness' for work. Swearing I wouldn't drink that week....

Then the stews and anxiety and shame and exhaustion and remorse adding up to a huge struggle to get through the day and back to a whole bottle of wine for dinner Monday evening..... And right back on the drunkey-go-round.

Nowadays, in sobriety, Mondays can still be stressful.... But I'm equipped to handle them with a smile and gratitude.

#soberliferocks

PurpleKnight

For me it all came down to doing something different, continuing to hang out with the same people and do the same thing, but expecting different results never worked.

I needed to change things up to make Sobriety happen, but it can be done!!

greens

Do you have a community college in your area that offers art or dance classes? Have u ever tried meet.up ? There are lots of ways to make sober acquaintances. Also, volunteering can be a good way to meet people too