The Language of Letting Go
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The Language of Letting Go
NOVEMBER 29
Step Twelve
The Twelfth Step says that having had a spiritual awakening, we try to carry this message to others. Our message is one of hope, love, comfort, health - a better way of life, one that works.
How do we carry it? Not by rescuing. Not by controlling. Not by obsessing. Not by becoming evangelists for the recovery cause.
We carry the message in many small, subtle, but powerful ways. We do our own recovery work and become a living demonstration of hope, self-love, comfort, and health. These quiet behaviors can be a powerful message.
Inviting (not ordering or demanding) someone to go to a meeting is a powerful way to carry the message.
Going to our meetings and sharing how recovery works for us is a powerful way to carry the message.
Being who we are and allowing our Higher Power to guide our actions are powerful ways to carry the message. Often, we find ourselves carrying the message more effectively than we do when we set out to reform, convince, or coerce someone into recovery.
Caretaking and controlling are not ways to carry the message. All those behaviors carry is codependency.
Still, the most powerful form of helping others comes down to helping ourselves. When we do our own work and are honest and open about it, we impact others more than by our most well intentioned "helping" gesture. We cannot change others, but when we change ourselves, we may end up changing the world.
Today, I will strive to carry the message in ways that work. I will let go of my need to "help" people. Instead, I will concentrate on helping and changing myself. If an opportunity comes up to share my recovery with someone, I will do so quietly. Higher Power, help me show others comfort, empowerment, and hope. I can be a channel to help others when I am ready. I do not have to force this; it will happen naturally.
©1990, Hazelden Foundation. All rights reserved.
__________________
Step Twelve
The Twelfth Step says that having had a spiritual awakening, we try to carry this message to others. Our message is one of hope, love, comfort, health - a better way of life, one that works.
How do we carry it? Not by rescuing. Not by controlling. Not by obsessing. Not by becoming evangelists for the recovery cause.
We carry the message in many small, subtle, but powerful ways. We do our own recovery work and become a living demonstration of hope, self-love, comfort, and health. These quiet behaviors can be a powerful message.
Inviting (not ordering or demanding) someone to go to a meeting is a powerful way to carry the message.
Going to our meetings and sharing how recovery works for us is a powerful way to carry the message.
Being who we are and allowing our Higher Power to guide our actions are powerful ways to carry the message. Often, we find ourselves carrying the message more effectively than we do when we set out to reform, convince, or coerce someone into recovery.
Caretaking and controlling are not ways to carry the message. All those behaviors carry is codependency.
Still, the most powerful form of helping others comes down to helping ourselves. When we do our own work and are honest and open about it, we impact others more than by our most well intentioned "helping" gesture. We cannot change others, but when we change ourselves, we may end up changing the world.
Today, I will strive to carry the message in ways that work. I will let go of my need to "help" people. Instead, I will concentrate on helping and changing myself. If an opportunity comes up to share my recovery with someone, I will do so quietly. Higher Power, help me show others comfort, empowerment, and hope. I can be a channel to help others when I am ready. I do not have to force this; it will happen naturally.
©1990, Hazelden Foundation. All rights reserved.
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Seren, I am finding that the act of reading these carefully while typing them out is turning out to be a wonderful exercise for me. I'm glad to be able to make this small contribution. Thanks for your help in getting the right format!
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Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 230
I'm also nowhere near Step 12 but it seems to me that by being living examples of the other Steps as we learn them and being honest and sharing about what we learn through recovery is a way of acquainting ourselves with Step 12 as we progress through the others.
I've read a couple of your posts from this book...thinking I'd like to add it to my library. Thanks!
I've read a couple of your posts from this book...thinking I'd like to add it to my library. Thanks!
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Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Iowa
Posts: 3,050
Thanks HP. Hope all is peaceful for you there way up north. Right now we're enjoying some balmy, just above freezing temps down here in Iowa.
I'll be leading our step 12 meeting next Tuesday. This is good stuff.
But do I really have to stop sending my ex's parents Alanon literature? It's public outreach, I swear! I almost never marked specific pages for them to read.
Progress not perfection, and a good reminder of how far I've come since starting way back last October with good old step one.
Big hugs to you.
I'll be leading our step 12 meeting next Tuesday. This is good stuff.
But do I really have to stop sending my ex's parents Alanon literature? It's public outreach, I swear! I almost never marked specific pages for them to read.
Progress not perfection, and a good reminder of how far I've come since starting way back last October with good old step one.
Big hugs to you.
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