Thatdeliveryguy

Someone that is famous dies, and then the world cares, they become a lightning rod for debate. Everyone lauds them as hero or azzhole, rarely is any impression outside of those diametrically opposed positions. Its like they can't separate a man from his actions or non actions, regardless of the position you hold. Whats wrong with saying, his work was brilliant, he was troubled, in the end he ended his life, he was an addict, an good guy, but life overcame him.

What I know, a man with addictions, killed himself from asphyxia ( meaning he died a slow tragic death), not from a broken neck ( the quicker way). Sad even saying these things, really we're talking about our brethren another man, who honestly cares about the details? DEATH is eternal.

Sadly off the top of my head I could name famous people that are dead because of mental issues, and or addiction for the next hour ad naseum. Even more saddening, I can name people nobody has ever heard of that I've come into contact with in life that are too dead at no end.

I've learned much from all them, on a personal note I really miss some of my friends, at least one person I know that killed themselves. However, they have passed, and however they died they are truly dead. I mourn there deaths but they are gone and I am still here with a hope to be sober.

Society is learning a lesson, society wants to pass laws, analyze objectify, find logic in non logical situations. Find that gene, identify a turning point, find an answer. Honestly, that stuff is for the ideologues, I just want to be sober. I am perfectly fine, letting the experts debating those things, but I, me, just want sobriety for me.

I just wanted to say as a newcomer, I am ignoring it all, I care, but the debate is senseless to me. I won't, can't and could sincerely careless about this that and the other, I care about me and where I am at.

In my early sobriety, I say ignore the world, discount all the debate, focus on what keeps you sober, and move forward. My head got spinning hearing all of this spin and blathering over the last couple of days. There is value in the debate and the debate may grow are knowledge base in the future, or even find cures or other treatments, but none of us should live in the future, I want to live in the present. I am annoyed by all the distraction, particularly concerning the fact that someone is dead, and everyone wants to proffer an opinion and so forth. Really, if I was that person, I don't think I would want to be Goded or anything else, or be the lightning rod, I would just want to RIP and hope for the best for others. Someone died and all the fanfare, sheesh, sad state!

I was still am reluctant to post this, but felt moved to redirect the conversation on us recovering alcoholics, not what has passed. Still feel like, I can't save anyone but me!

Stay safe and sober friends TDG

MythOfSisyphus

While we can and should help others in need at the heart of it you're correct; you can't "save" someone that doesn't want to be saved. The flips side is that while others can help you, you have to do the "saving" of yourself...yourself.

PurpleKnight

Good plan TDG, when I first got Sober I focused on myself and my Sobreity, that was the most important focus of my life for the time being!!

MythOfSisyphus

I agree! If your friend stepped into some quicksand and was in sinking, what would make more sense- tossing her a rope or jumping in after her? Well, duh! You can't be of much help if you're mired in the quicksand with her. The best option is to reach out from solid ground.

That's how sobriety works. If we want to be useful as fathers, mothers, siblings or friends we have to take care of ourselves first. Don't be too quick to accept criticism that your AA meetings take too long, you're a party pooper for not just having one beer with your buddies, etc. Letting yourself be talked out of making sobriety a priority is a sure path into the quicksand.

GracieLou

I try to practice this almost every day but I think it is fundamental at the beginning. Worry about you and doing what you must do to remain sober.

I think a big chunk of my first year I did nothing but go to meetings and work with my sponsor on the steps. Other than going to work and regular household responsibilities, I worked on my recovery.

MIRecovery

Staying sober especially in early sobriety takes an incredible amount of physical mental and emotional energy. The world will still be here when things start getting easier. Put the blinders on and Keep doing what you are doing

Weasel1966

TDG..... You have what it takes to stay sober and live a sober life. The focus has to be on oneself. Sobriety first means us first. Not that we all don't care but we can all only care enough that we can still nurture ourselves first. That's not being selfish either. Because we have little to offer others when we stay broken.

MIRecovery

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