DopieDopeMan

Hey, I have a couple of questions for anyone here who has more than a year or two sober. I've only ever managed to get to 48 days in the past 6 years.

Do the constant thoughts of "today I wont be drinking" ever fade with time? Do you ever have days where you actually don't think about your addiction in some way? Lastly, do you ever truly go to family parties/restaurants with wine on display etc and you honestly don't think anything of it?

I guess i'm asking does the task of staying sober remain as such a strong, prominent presence in your mind all the time? It seems almost like a new addiction, where I am obsessed now with staying sober, with it rarely out of my thoughts for more than a couple of hours at a time.

MIRecovery

Yes there are days when the thought of drink never occur to me. Still not wild about drinking situations but I tolerate them when I have to.

LBrain

I ONLY have about 7 months. But I rarely think about drinking in my daily activities. A few months ago was a different story. Not drinking has become a part of me. I don't have to remind myself like I did back then. It's become a natural thing for me.

CAPTAINZING2000

Been a lot of years since a drink has entered my thoughts

DopieDopeMan

Thanks guys, it's encouraging to hear

neferkamichael

Yes, thoughts of drinking do go away with time, rootin for ya.

mecanix

Mine got quieter as time passed, last heard from about august 2012 .

I do a lot to keep myself on an emotional stable and even keel though and work hard on making life as glorious as possible … I'm not sure if you'd call that a recovery program or trying to live life as best you can ? to me it doesn't seem to matter …

Would a happy man ask himself if he's happy ? It's not a question i ask myself .

Bestwishes, m

Saliena

I will have 3 years in Dec. I have days were I don't think about drinking or recovery at all. As time passes you find other things to fill your life with. Those are the things I think about. AA has gotten me sober, and helped keep me sober. So there are times that something from a meeting will pop into my head and I will remind myself of how I got sober and why I did.

Bottom line it does get easier... but, it never goes away (alteast for me) totally. I have to remember my bottom least I repeat it.

PurpleKnight

Thoughts fade with time, but that needs to be balanced up with creating new habits and a new Sober life, with time when these habits are cemented and alcohol is increasingly pushed out the thoughts of alcohol sometimes don't crop up as much as they used to!!

Hang in there, it'll come with time!!

keithj

I haven't thought about taking a drink for a long long time. Nor have I ever (since recovery) had to make the decision of whether or not I'm going to drink today. It's a non-issue in my world. My experience with others is that anyone who is still having thoughts of drinking on a regular basis, is eventually going to drink unless something serious changes.

That doesn't mean that I don't make continued recovery a major part of my life. I practice that stuff and live that way every single day. But I do that because it's a great way to live, not because I'm worried about a drink today.

SonomaGal

I'm almost at 9 months. I engage daily in my (self made) recovery program, but the actual cravings are few and far between. In the last 2.5 months, I've had only 2 periods with really intense cravings. Both times I told myself, "just get to a year, and then see how you feel". I have been doing this time trick since the beginning (just get to next week, 100 days, 6 months, 9 months and see you feel). It seems to work for my AV.

Most important the longer I'm sober, the more manageable and enjoyable it is.

Hevyn

Dopie, I rarely think of it now.

I once lived for it and couldn't imagine my life without it. I drank for decades, and was completely dependent on it in the end. When faced with the fact that I had to quit or die I thought life would be so miserable and boring. I was so wrong. Being numb & foggy isn't living. It's wonderful to be free.

Carlotta

I celebrated a year and a half yesterday and it is extremely rare when I get a thought or a craving, the obsession was lifted immediately for me and I know that this is my pitfall.
I had over 5 years sober and I hit a very rough patch in my life, my AV popped up with a revenge and I was completely unprepared for it (and had no support). I relapsed and drank for 6 years.
While it is nice to have a very quiet AV, I know I have to keep vigilant. Sooner or later, it will reappear. It gets dormant but it really never goes away altogether.

Climber122

From time to time, friends or family will qualify a dinner invitation or a trip to a holiday spot with "that won't be a problem for you, will it?" I tell them with a smile, "Hey, if I want alcohol, I can get it anytime I want." We are literally surrounded by this drug ethanol, and I rarely think about it. Won't say never, but rarely.

Living in a world where a drink is not something I have to obsess on is the best possible freedom I could have. You can have it too, but it takes a while to rewire the brain. We addicts and alcoholics in addiction are wired to seek that drug so much that we really CAN'T imagine life without it. But many people have proven it can be done - once you decide you want to be free of that monkey on your back, you need to take action and find a program of recovery that works for you. I wish you the best!

IOAA2

Well I haven’t had a desire to drink in +35 years. I attribute it to working the program and hearing many tips over the years at meetings. A big one for me in the beginning especially was to NOT think about drinking, think of something else. If I did think about it be honest with myself and follow it through to where it would end. One pearl I got early on that means a lot to me is “if we don’t pick up the first drink we NEVER have to get sober AGAIN. I had too many AGAINS.
By the way the time from my last drink involves a lot of work to this day and I wouldn’t change a thing. It’s great to be alive and comfortable in my own skin.

BE WELL

bigsombrero

I have over 2 years and I have similar feelings. I also have days and sometimes weeks where the thought of a drink doesn't enter my mind. I also have times that when a drink does enter my mind, it seems unattractive.

It never goes away completely, though. There are plenty of days where I battle thoughts of "going back out" or "just this once". I check in regularly here at SR on the Weekenders Thread to catch up and get support.

As for drinking situations: I pretty much came to the conclusion that events like "going out to the bar" or "XYZ Summer Booze Fest" aren't situations I would enjoy any more. It sounds obvious, but you'd be amazed at how many people in early recovery assume that they will get to keep this part of their life with ease. In my case, these were really the only social situations I knew how to handle. A big part of my recovery has been about learning how to socialize as a sober adult, it's kept me busy and occupied.

toomuchtoolose

I find for me it goes in phases. I can go through weeks / months where not drinking is not even a 'thing' for me and it's like I've totally forgotten about it. Then quietly the thoughts resurface. It takes a while for me to notice but as soon as I do, I come back here. I've been sober 18 months now so haven't worked out my triggers bit will do in time I'm sure. Hope that helps

sobermax

They seem to fade and / or become less scary. I don't keep track but reckon I have some alcohol-related thoughts most days. However, so long as I am mindful, the chance of those thoughts developing into actions is nil (I'll be three years sober next month). I like catching them early and imagine that they skulk away defeated.

My life was one big booze obsession for twenty years - thought I would never be free and that being sober would be a daily trial. It isn't at all.

Good luck mate,

SM

sugarbear1

3 years and 2 months ago life was dark, very, very dark.

I quit weed and alcohol at the age of 50. Those thoughts left me.... I did use those 12 steps cause I was really, really desperate.

I know if you stay stopped and know in your heart you can't drink, that those thoughts can go away!

desypete

10 years sober here
i never think of a drink at all these days
i can go anywere were drinks are served and it doesnt bother me

not that i go very often but me and the kids would go for a steak at the local steak house or me and my friend would go and play some snooker in the club or you guys in the usa shoot pool i believe lol

i was a 24 / 7 drinker at one time but today it just doesnt enter my head but then its taken a long road of hard work and practise of a new way to live to be free from that madness
i wouldnt swap what i have for the world even though my life isn't full of joy and happiness i am still sober and grateful that i am.