4 months and apology
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Join Date: Jun 2014
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4 months and apology
Yesterday had my 4 month mark. I really wanted to post, but I have kept posting on SR a secret so I couldn't. I wanted to post about something I read: People telling you they don't trust anyone that doesn't drink... I used to be one of those ignorant people. I just didn't get it. I am so sorry that I ever said that. I feel like an a******! I felt like going to everyone I ever said that to and taking it back. I have been telling a lot of people that I quit drinking, I guess it has just fallen naturally into the conversation. I feel really excited and happy about it. I have my friend's 30th birthday on Saturday and I am soooo excited to go sober, for so many reasons. Before, my husband would be so nervous about me going because of me getting drunk and being belligerent. He know knows that I mean it, that I will not drink. He trust me again and I feel amazing about it. He actually told me, "I love you more for taking that decision" (quitting booze). I actually cried a little bit without letting him see it. I was overwhelmed with happiness. Later I told him how much his support meant to me. He is starting to make a comeback. At first he wanted me to moderate and he even told me that (when I told him that I was quitting booze and a few weeks into it pot) I was going to be boring... His tone is different now. Needless to say, that "boring comment didn't go over well...
That is the thing... I am crazy anyway, I don't need booze to enhance it. I am funny, I will sing a cappella, dance any kind of music and be who I am. People have been cool about me quitting. My friend actually told me people were really respecting me and were impressed by me doing that. I mean, I used to be the one that always partied the hardest and I was always the last one up, but they know that alcohol has affected me (for example missing one of my 2 best friend's wedding because I got so hammered. I AM SO MAD AT THAT! IT WILL FOREVER HAUNT ME! I feel like my life was punctuated by getting drunk at every special occasion...
So, all is well. I have been thinking about booze a little bit, but then I remember the night of my daughter's birthday when I passed on the couch and I woke myself up throwing up on myself at 3 in the am, having to wake up and clean it and hide it and then flip the cushion so that my mominlaw, dadinlaw, sisinlaw and hubby couldn't tell. Bthaaaaaa!
Thanks SR for letting me express my feelings. This was what I needed!
That is the thing... I am crazy anyway, I don't need booze to enhance it. I am funny, I will sing a cappella, dance any kind of music and be who I am. People have been cool about me quitting. My friend actually told me people were really respecting me and were impressed by me doing that. I mean, I used to be the one that always partied the hardest and I was always the last one up, but they know that alcohol has affected me (for example missing one of my 2 best friend's wedding because I got so hammered. I AM SO MAD AT THAT! IT WILL FOREVER HAUNT ME! I feel like my life was punctuated by getting drunk at every special occasion...
So, all is well. I have been thinking about booze a little bit, but then I remember the night of my daughter's birthday when I passed on the couch and I woke myself up throwing up on myself at 3 in the am, having to wake up and clean it and hide it and then flip the cushion so that my mominlaw, dadinlaw, sisinlaw and hubby couldn't tell. Bthaaaaaa!
Thanks SR for letting me express my feelings. This was what I needed!
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