enfinthechange

Its been a while since I was on here, I feel a little guilty and , erm, quite a lot stupid... but have finally plucked up the courage to get back on here as its the only thing that seems to work.

I did 2 months sober which was awesome, challenging but really good... then I caved in while friends were visiting, and have been back to my old ways ever since. I can drink a little somedays, and that gives me a false sense of security, coz after a few days or weeks, bam, ultra drunk and remorseful.

My OH is struggling with the same issues, and he wont seek help, or actually commit to giving up, whereas I really want to stop!

He is currently in bed with a massive hangover, while I can still function with a hangover, so am downstairs , kids watching telly.

I have to get this under control, or something very bad is going to happen...

All my friends drink a lot, everything seems to revolve around beer, I just dont know how I can break the habit. But I am going to try...

So there, I have to press send, and then I am committed to change... Wish me luck!

PS - A massive hello to my old SR friends, I have let you down... sorry. But I'm back (if you'll have me) x

Dee74

Welcome back enfin

we don't shoot our wounded - I'm just glad you're back

D

enfinthechange

Ha, that made me chuckle, at least Im not going to be shot!!!

enfinthechange

I am actually ridiculously cheerful having been on SR for a while... I forgot how great and supportive this place was... I am full of hope!!

hayley86

Welcome back!

HeadLump

Yes, welcome back, enfin You CAN do this - 2 months is no mean feat, so you clearly have what it takes. Tap into that - and to us

enfinthechange

Thanks guys, been talking to my OH now he is up, and he is on board too!!! heres to a sober marriage and a better future for us and the squids!

Gunna need your help, and I am already grateful for your replies!!!

Enfin x

instant

great you are thinking of making positive change. I found the only control I could rely on came when I took alcohol completely out of the equation. I even have my self respect back!!

enfinthechange

Self respect... whats that! might find some hopefully!!!

HeadLump

Stick with it, enfin. I promise you, self respect will come, and you will be amazed by the love and compassion that comes along with it

PurpleKnight

Welcome back!!

EyesOfAStranger

enfinthechange....just wanted to say hello and wish you the best.

My mother is originally from Wales, came to the states when she was in her early 20's (been 50 years now ). Lost her brother, my uncle, to the drink. I understand when you say it's everywhere - she has told me it's a part of the lifestyle, and you start young.

On a family vacation to England my brother and I were out with my cousin and his friend. 15 years old and served at a bar no problem, no questions asked. I still cannot get past that, would never happen here.

So, just want to wish you well. It must be so hard when it's all around you, but great to hear your hubby is on board - that should help. Best wishes

Tonymblue

2 months is great. Youre really strong. Just think how much stronger the two of you will be together.

enfinthechange

Your dead right there Eyesofastranger... we started going to the pub at 16 and it is a hobby for many many people... as is to drink as much as possible whenever you go out! Was just talking to a chap who is making it his aim to drink 25 pints of cider in one sitting so he can beat the previous winner, who drank 22... that is a deadly game no?

Half my family is welsh, and they are BIG drinkers.... with a personality like mine, it was inevitable that I would be the 'best' at drinking, more, most, longest.... never really get hangovers so no problem there to put me off!!!

Last time I gave up for 2 months I monitored the conversations I had with people, almost all involved drink, or being drunk... sad huh!

Anyway, its evening, and I am thinking about beer, but I aint having any!!!

Thanks for you post! x

Ren1love

Hello!
Im Renee and I am on day 3 of recovery. I went 40 days then relapsed. I felt so awful and dissapointed in myself. Now i feel like ugh day 3 whats the point? ya know. But when I marked my board today with the 3rd day. It actually felt nice

biminiblue

It's really good to see you back, Enfin.

EyesOfAStranger

enfin - yes, even though it was 25 years ago (my where has time gone!) I can remember seeing just what you described, as they took us around to many many pubs. I remember my cousin's friend was the "driver" - I can't quite say designated as he still drank. If I remember correctly it was called elephant beer. In the biggest glasses I have ever seen in my life! And he was being "good" so to drive. I think he stopped himself at 5 of those huge beers. Oh my. Maybe for him it truly wasn't that much.

It has to be so so hard when it's "the norm". I did have a chance to meet my uncle before he passed, and the image of him...jaundice, shaky, sickly. At 15 I didn't understand, but I do now. Being a full blown alcoholic his liver just couldn't last. And he never did give up the drink, even as sick as he was for years and years. I am so thankful my cousins did not follow in his footsteps....but I also do not have much contact with them, so who knows it can rear its ugly head at any time.

Good on you for not drinking tonight. It's so hard, it consumes your thoughts - I can relate to that. But just try to push it out of your mind. Easier said than done I know So proud of you!

Mags1

Hi Enfin, welcome and good to meet you. So glad your husband on board too, you'll both be able to support each other. As you know, lots of great people here ready to give their support.

enfinthechange

Thanks guys... I hope my husband is up for sticking to it - we kind of encourage each other, as we are original drinking buddies - but we will just have to be sober buddies instead, 20 years of drinking together... lets see what happens!!!