seethefuture

Hello - here I am - back reading and thinking about my life. Lately I have fallen into the "finish the bottle" syndrome - hey, there is only half a bottle left (wine) so why not stay up and finish it? Why, indeed? Clearly, not a good idea, especially after already having drinks out with friends. I am losing so much productive time - it's got to stop.

I know right now my trigger is my brother's death - he died last year and his birthday is coming up. Stupid part is that I am sure his death was alcohol related. Why would I want to repeat history?

Sober today, and planning a sober tomorrow. Just reaching out to make it through this very sad weekend.

ScottFromWI

Sorry to hear about your brother, planning a sober weekend sounds like an honorable thing to do. Do you have any specfic plans for what you might do tomorrow to keep from picking up ( and having to finsh ) a bottle?

Seanfox

Sorry to hear about your brother. Sounds like you have a good head on you by coming here instead of drowning your sorrows which achieves nothing. Good luck and stay strong.

seethefuture

I have plans to work out, cook with my boyfriend, and complete some very pressing and annoying paperwork - the carrot is that once I get this paperwork done, I can move on in two very significant areas of my life.

And, it would be a nice tribute to my brother. His death was a horrible accident and I know he had been drinking. I have spent a lot of time the last few days picturing him in the funeral home when I went to make his arrangements.

LBrain

Sorry to hear about your brother. You could honor him by dedicating your sobriety to him. Just a thought.

seethefuture

I still can't believe he is gone. 46 years old - way too young. He struggled with so many things in life. I've always been the "good" one - my parents have no idea of my struggles and I cannot disappoint them.

GotGrace

(((seethefuture))))
Stick close and let us know if you need support this weekend!

Treerat66

Hi seethefuture, sorry to hear about your bro.

Soberpotamus

I'm sorry for your loss. Reaching out here is a great move.

I lost my mother to her addiction in 2010 and I drank for the following three years before I decided to get sober. So I understand how absurd it seems that you'd drink following your brother's alcohol related death.

You can step out of the loop. Glad you're here!

least

I am sorry for the loss of your brother and for this sad anniversary. Dedicate your sobriety to your brother. What a way to honor him.

seethefuture

Jennie - we lost my 1st cousin to an alcohol related accident about 15 years ago. There were 4 of us - the two sister/cousins, and my brother and me. Now there's only two of us left. My other cousin does not drink at all. Why wouldn't I see that's the best option for me, too? I thank you for reaching out in understanding.

Soberpotamus

Sounds like you're aware and seeing it's the best option now

Kris47

Sorry to hear about your brother.

The best present you can give him or yourself now would be sobriety.

Hevyn

It's good to see you! Be proud of yourself for wanting to give sobriety another try. We know you can do it. Nothing is helped or made easier by getting numb. It sounds like you're ready to do this seethefuture.