joshlyman

My little cousin (20) is in the hospital dying from respiratory failure from a compilation of pneumonia. This happened overnight. I drank. I wanted to drink as soon as I heard this. This cousin is bascially a little sister to me. She is special needs and she has been my pride and joy since I've been old enough to know better. And there's a really really good chance that she will die. I wish I had been strong enough to tackle this sober but I just simple was not. I am texting my sponsor and have been all night but I don't think there's anything anyone can say to me. I'm drinking through this. I just don't understand how a 20 year old can be taken from this world like this.

Please pray for my cousin Heather. She needs all the prayers she can get.

joshlyman

I want to believe in God so bad but how can God do this to a 20 year old special needs child and her family who love her so so so so much?

Renarde

I'm so sorry this is happening to your family. Are you still drinking right now?

justinJustQuit

I'm so sorry to hear this news. The only thing I can say is that alcohol cannot make anything better. No matter what, when we pick up, we're slowly killing ourselves and erasing time.

Hell, I am detoxing from my last binge, because I had to get rid of my cat. So I cannot imagine the pain you are feeling.

joshlyman

Thank you guys. Yes sadly I am drinking right now. I just can't wrap my brain around this. How can this happen? She is the sweetest person anyone would ever meet.

StormiNormi

Hon, I am so sorry. Looking someone we love, specially at an early age, is one of life's hardest trials. I lost my daughter at the age of 27. God is/he not abandoned Heather, He is right by her side. If she does not make it, He will be there to catch her. Remember Jesus wept? God will and does turn what was meant for evil into good for those who believe in Him. It is now, I can believe God has turned out tragedy into something goo. I know it is nearly a impossible to see this now- that is where faith walks in the door. Ask for His strength and courage, and thank Him for helping you not to drink. I hope this didn't sound preachy. All I know is God has saved me from the wreckage of my past, and has healed my broken heart.

Dee74

I can't tell you why bad things happen to good people but they do Josh.
I'm sorry for your pain and sorry for your cousin and her family.

Drinking doesn't help tho - it can't take away the pain or the fear, or the anger.
I think, hard as it is, we need to feel those things to get through them - and so you can be there for your cousin and her family Josh.

I hope you decide to stop drinking.

D

1newcreation

Lifted a prayer for her!
Undstd that this is a tuf time your facing but please don't blame God for this. There is sin, sickness, disease & wickedness in the world which man has had/done since beginning of time. Plus what sense does it make for us to blame Him then turn around & pray asking for His help? Will continue praying for her tomm
Gnite

venuscat

Oh Josh, I am so sorry about your beautiful cousin.
Sending you and your family love and prayers.

You may be drinking right now, but you are here, and I think a part of you knows that this is not what you really want. And as Dee said, we have to feel these emotions, no matter how painful they are, in order to get through them.

We are all here for you.

Love Venus xx

Croissant

Hi Josh, so very sorry. Life just doesn't make sense sometimes.

Please stop drinking. Your cousin needs you to be a man now and if things aren't so good please give her the dignity of being sober so you can say your goodbyes if you have to.

Drinking just delays what you have to deal with eventually.

May she get through this.

finaltime

Thinking about you and your family. Praying from China for Heather. God will hold on to her tight no matter.

heath480

My heart goes out to you josh.

Will keep you and your family in my prayers.

Drinking will not help anybody,throw your booze stash out.Your family need support.

Remember this is not about you,it is about the poor girl in hospital.

Wishing you well.

Aellyce

Joshlyman... look... we'll all die in the form we are, someday. That's the plain, literal truth. I've faced loss myself more times than one might want, and no need to get into it.

About 4 months ago, before I quit drinking, one of my best friends of the past 5-6 years died in a hospital and I stayed with him non-stop during his last ~4 days. Wealthy person so all sorts of high tech care and medical attention you can imagine. But he was a complete loner in the end. Not an addict, other issues... no friends, no family visiting. I met him in a philosophy discussion group ~2 years beforehand.

Strangely, or not so... he called me (and still not his family) when he was diagnosed with colon cancer. It progressed very fast, I'll save you from details.

I sure drank also, but I was there when no one else was. To be honest, I was drunk constantly while being with him in the hospital, but not blackout drunk. I remember all of it very well.

He died of complications of colon cancer, metastases, etc.

I decided to get sober in the following month (this January). Zillions of thoughts and emotions inspired by staying with my friend in his last 4 days, to turn my own life around...

Good thoughts for Heather, and yourself!

chicory

Josh, do what you need to , for your family, as you know you will have regrets if you do not. They are all feeling this pain, imagine if everyone dealt with it by drinking? you can do this.. they are, you can. do it for yourself, for Heather. they need you, no doubt, and it sounds like you love her very much. let love guide you.
prayers going up for Heather.

deeker

joshlyman, so sorry bout your cousin. Ya know we are going to face a lot of disappointment in life. People will pass away, people we know will be in accidents. If she were to pass away and you were drinking how bad will you feel that you were not there for her or if you were in a black out and do not remember your last moments with her.

Whatever happens is going to happen regardless if you drink or not, but by drinking you are just adding more tragedy to tragedy. Your family is now probably worried about her and now you because you are drinking again.

How can you be helpful and supportive of her parents in that state?

MIRecovery

What wonderful words. My daughter 28 has stage 4 cancer with cure not being an option. If it had not been for my deep faith in God I do not know where I would be.

Things are not all rainbows and unicorns but I am sober and dealing with life on life's terms

Fear knocked
Faith answered
No one was there

Thepatman

Prayers your way.

Gilmer

I am praying, Josh.

flutter

I'm so sorry.

Upward2Enlightenment

Josh not only am I gonna pray for Heather, I am gonna pray for you and your family.

Please try to not drink or at least not much. You don't want your last bit of time you may have with her to be clouded by alcohol. I know it is extremely painful and you feel you can't deal with it but I believe you can. Please try to be strong for her and if god forbid she does pass, you will meet her in heaven later.

Love and hugs to you and your family.
God bless