Oh god.... Blackout haunting
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 809
Oh god.... Blackout haunting
Was just informed of something absolutely awful that I did during my last black out (5 days ago).... Oh god.... I honestly don't deserve to live.... I'm going to end up drinking tonight. I can't feel this. can't look in the mirror. can't face this. Can't be in reality right now. arrrrrrrrggggggggg nooooooooooooo whyyyyyyyyyyyyy
Are you trying to top your old situation?
Maybe just stay stopped another day, maybe your perspective can change in time, or you can drink and make more situations to drink over....
It's your choice now.....
I wish you well on your sober journey!!!!!!
Hugs and love to you
Maybe just stay stopped another day, maybe your perspective can change in time, or you can drink and make more situations to drink over....
It's your choice now.....
I wish you well on your sober journey!!!!!!
Hugs and love to you
Stop and take some deep breaths, mrrryah. Wait a minute and do it again.
Drinking never solved a thing; you will only feel worse tomorrow and the underlying problem will still be there.
Do you have a sober friend you can call; do you have a sponsor?
WE are here; don't pick up a drink, okay - say you won't.
Drinking never solved a thing; you will only feel worse tomorrow and the underlying problem will still be there.
Do you have a sober friend you can call; do you have a sponsor?
WE are here; don't pick up a drink, okay - say you won't.
Here's the deal--most of us have done something while drunk that is mortifying, but the absolute truth is that drinking again will not improve the situation/make it go away/rewrite history. You might "forget" for a few hours, but when tomorrow comes, those bad feelings (plus, regret from drinking) will come flooding back in.
Myrrah, you can do this. You are stronger than you think. Be kind and gentle with yourself (just as you probably would be with someone else in a similar situation). Each day you are sober will add to your healing.
Myrrah, you can do this. You are stronger than you think. Be kind and gentle with yourself (just as you probably would be with someone else in a similar situation). Each day you are sober will add to your healing.
It's ok to feel what you're feeling. Even the worst feelings of self-loathing and remorse will pass, but if you don't drink, you're not likely to do anything to add new fuel to that burning hell.
Be brave, eat something, and crawl under the covers -- but don't drink!
Be brave, eat something, and crawl under the covers -- but don't drink!
Yesterday is gone and there's nothing you can do to change it, but your future tomorrows are built on the actions you take today. You never have to add another alcohol-fueled page of regrets to your history book if you take responsibility for what you do right now, in this moment. Instead of drinking over your mistakes, look at the reality of the mess alcohol creates in your life, only you can choose to walk away from it.
Good, try to stay calm. You aren't alone. you aren't the first person to do something horrifying while blacked out and you certainly won't be the last. I've venture that the majority of us have been there.
Staying sober is the best way to ease the emotional pain you're experiencing.
Staying sober is the best way to ease the emotional pain you're experiencing.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 809
Thanks guys that was just really rough to hear and I was having a breakdown I'm scared and mortified and I don't know how to handle these feelings of self loathing they seem to take me out every time
I think the only way to deal with it, is to just sit with the feelings. Know that they are just feelings. They are not you. They don't control you. You can feel them and let them go. Journaling might help. You can get through this.
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Sydney, NSW
Posts: 104
As my sponsor said to me "yea but that was yesterday...this is today". Look forward. There is nothing you can do as much as you would desperately like to. Remember time heals pretty much everything and people don't spend anywhere like the amount of time thinking about what you did as you think they do.
The ride ends when you decide it ends.
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