Nikkabean326

I don't like dreaming of alcohol. Do you dream about it?

Haven't had a drink in 24 days. Truth be told, it hasn't been hard. Friday's I would normally get drunk so I take a moment to recognize that. My boyfriend may grab a beer from the fridge and under normal circumstances I'd hear him yell "Hey babe, you want one?" to which I'd reply "Uhhh.. yeah!" Now we don't have that interaction so, that's a bit odd. I'm pretty much surrounded by alcohol all the time. We have 47 bottles of good beer. We have lots of top shelf liquor. It's just.. not hard abstain for me.

Anyway, two nights in a row I had dreams about alcohol. I don't remember much about the first one. I know that I didn't drink any. Last night was a little different. In the dream it was my boyfriend's birthday and we were headed to Manhattan to celebrate. I distinctly remember being disappointed and upset because I wasn't going to be drinking with everyone. In the dream I ended up opening a beer and I suppose I was drinking it. I don't remember drinking it. I remember my boyfriend coming over and I looked at him and said "I'm just going to have one!" Now, this dream could have been related to a conversation he and I had right before bed. He came home from his friends house and I told him I did a bad thing. He said "What!?" I whispered "...I ate chips" (We've been eating very healthy so the chips were a big no no!) He was like "Oh geez, I thought you were going to say you had a drink."

Meh. Just throwing some thoughts around this morning. The whole thing is pretty fascinating to me. I've done a lot of research on the topic. Kind of becoming obsessed with it. Am I an alcoholic? Can binge drinking actually be controlled? Abstaining is not hard. So, is having one drink and not going past that the real test for a binge drinker? I think about the things that I've done in the past year.. like blacking out a few times and missing work a couple of times due to a hangover. I think about the reasoning behind those actions. In most cases, I drank because I had a really stressful/difficult day at work. Or I drank because I felt lonely. A lot of it had to do with body image. I feel undesirable but when I drink it'll give you that false sense of self acceptance. Is it the act of drinking that's the problem or is it all of the underlying issues? If I had different tools to deal with these issues, would I turn to alcohol to "fix" those feelings?

Anyway, hope you all have a lovely day! Got a pork tenderloin going in the slow cooker with apples, agave and onion. Yum! Raw banana and blackberry ice cream for dessert. Woot! Remember to smile today

FreeOwl

uhm.... you drank because you're an alcoholic.



Just callin' it like I see it - in myself!!!

As for the dreams... yes, it happens to me frequently. Sometimes it's just vague issues of temptation... sometimes it's horrifying realizations that I'm drunk or drinking.... then I wake up all afraid to a huge relief that it was only a dream.

I have been told these fade over time....

sillysuzanfree

I have drinking dreams quite often still, but always wake up relieved! They do not bother me anymore.

Can't say for sure in your case, but I think trying to "control my binges" would be too much work. I'd get back to where as I was in no time at all.

Have a wonderful sober day!

least

I used to have drinking dreams but it's been a long time since I had one. They do get less frequent with more sober time.

Blaizze

I remember having pretty vivid drinking dreams during the time I had gotten sober for an extended period of time (10 months). Some of them were down right terrifying. Why would I subconciously be afraid of something I enjoyed so much? Could the brain be fighting back? Telling us that it does not like being "turned off" by alcohol, as much as we try to "logically" convince ourselves otherwise? I think so.

ReadyAtLast

I don't know if the dreams mean something though I had them in early sobriety too

Towards the end of your post it sounds like you're questioning with yourself as to whether you have a drink problem or not.No one can tell you if you have or not though I would say do read your early posts here.

I can totally relate though .The first time I seriously quit I didn't find it too difficult,not compared to others' stories on here. I used that as a reason to convince myself I didn't have a problem and started drinking again. If I could not drink for 6 weeks ,relatively easily surely I couldn't have a problem? So I drank -nothing had changed it got worse . I did it twice again till I finally quit this time. I'd forgotten what brought me here in the first place

As Dee says,abstinence does not mean control.

Dee74

I know some folks put great store in dreams and meaning, but I never saw them as meaning anything.

I drank a lot for a long time - it makes sense to me I would dream about something I did a lot of.

as for what you are, and is one drink achievable etc etc - I think the key there is that you, or some part of you still wants to drink - if something else caused trouble in your life, you'd cut it out - not try and keep it in your life at all costs.

don't confuse abstinence with control.

Your life is good and getting better because alcohol is no longer a factor in your life - not because you've suddenly gain the superpower to drink normally.

If you drink again, I can all but guarantee that the same things that bought you here to SR will happen again.

D