Just Wondering
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: corry, pa
Posts: 55
Just Wondering
Has anyone ever felt AA meeting didn't help them? My AB says that AA meeting and the every night dreams make him want to drink. He has a sponsor but never calls him even if he's having a bad day. Does any of this sound familiar to anyone.
I didn't find AA helpful to me but it didn't "make me" want to drink.
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,967
Meetings are where we find the sponsor who will guide us through the steps. Calling them, meeting with them, calling others are only tools we use to stay stopped, but the changes in us come from the work we put into the stepwork.
If he wants to drink, maybe he's not ready to stay stopped yet?
Alcohol disrupts the entire sleep cycle, it takes time to recover and heal well.
If he wants to drink, maybe he's not ready to stay stopped yet?
Alcohol disrupts the entire sleep cycle, it takes time to recover and heal well.
Hears The Voice
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Unshackled
Posts: 7,901
I have been to many AA meetings that didn't help, and sometimes meetings make me want to drink.
I have also been to many AA meetings that were helpful.
I have learned to be selective about the meetings I attend.
I have also found additional (not AA related) tools for staying sober. If your AB truly finds AA unhelpful, is he trying (or researching) other recovery methods? They exist, but sometimes it takes a little effort to find them.
Best of Luck!
I have also been to many AA meetings that were helpful.
I have learned to be selective about the meetings I attend.
I have also found additional (not AA related) tools for staying sober. If your AB truly finds AA unhelpful, is he trying (or researching) other recovery methods? They exist, but sometimes it takes a little effort to find them.
Best of Luck!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 5,439
It sounds like alcoholic behavior. An alcoholic can say that ANYTHING makes them want to drink- lose your job? time to get drunk. Get a new job? Time to get drunk and celebrate. Trouble sleeping? Time to get drunk. Bad day? Time to get drunk. Good day? Time to get drunk. AA meeting? Time to get drunk. Dreams? Time to get drunk.
Recovery behavior looks more like: Lose your job? Time to stay sober so as to be able to focus on getting a new one. Get a new job? Time to stay sober so that you don't screw it up. Trouble sleeping? Time to get more exercise, start a stable schedule, drink some relaxing tea or just get up and watch some TV until you're tired. Bad day? Any day sober is better than the the best day drinking. Good day? No way I'm gonna screw that up by getting drunk. AA meeting? A good place to get support because staying sober is so important. Dreams? (I assume he means drinking dreams??) I'd call them a nightmare and be glad it didn't really happen once I wake up. (Or maybe it's just dreams in general since alcoholics tend to pass out cold rather than getting real sleep?? In which case I look at those as a blessing because my brain is healing.)
Recovery behavior looks more like: Lose your job? Time to stay sober so as to be able to focus on getting a new one. Get a new job? Time to stay sober so that you don't screw it up. Trouble sleeping? Time to get more exercise, start a stable schedule, drink some relaxing tea or just get up and watch some TV until you're tired. Bad day? Any day sober is better than the the best day drinking. Good day? No way I'm gonna screw that up by getting drunk. AA meeting? A good place to get support because staying sober is so important. Dreams? (I assume he means drinking dreams??) I'd call them a nightmare and be glad it didn't really happen once I wake up. (Or maybe it's just dreams in general since alcoholics tend to pass out cold rather than getting real sleep?? In which case I look at those as a blessing because my brain is healing.)
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