Carmie01

Hi Everyone,

I was on here briefly, earlier on in the year. Things have got so much more worse. We are finally losing the home due to my AH. We have a court order and today is 'D' day. We have approx. 21 days to get out and we can't rent a house because of bad credit. I have 3 beautiful daughters, a Grandson and they are all dependant on me. My AH is being made bankrupt as we speak, we have no money and I also found out on the 17th that my beautiful 16 year old is pregnant (my AH doesn't know).

My world is falling apart and I am desperate.

teresasue

I am soo sorry . This is extremly difficult and I will pray for you and your family. Can you get any shelter from friends or family ?

Carmie01

Thanks teresasue,

I have my very frail elderly mum. I don't know whether it is right to go to her as she is so ill and disabled. I feel I can't cope anymore.

Seren

Hello Carmie,

I'm so sorry to hear about all this--I can only begin to imagine how frightened you and the girls must be feeling right now.

I have no idea how to advise you about services available in England, but I think there must be some equivalent to Women's Shelters there. Perhaps you attend a local church and could speak to someone in their office. Frequently churches will have information about low-cost housing options in the area.

You and your family will be in my prayers!! Hang in there!!

Carlotta

I am so sorry for you
If you decide to take shelter at your mom's do her, you and the kids a favor and do not bring your AH along.

Good luck and hugs

spiderqueen

I am so sorry to hear of your troubles.

Yes, please look into emergency shelter resources to start, and hopefully they can guide you to some kind of housing that doesn't require the usual upfront costs, credit checks, etc.

Also, use your personal network of friends and family - put the call out there LOUD AND CLEAR, do not mince words, and do not feel ashamed! Just call for help, and maybe someone has a sublet, or knows someone with a rental who would accept the reference of a friend. This is where social networking sites can be a godsend.

FeelingGreat

Hi Carmie, I'm not from the UK but I would expect your council would help with housing, and possibly your local member of parliament. Their staff would be familiar with this kind of housing crisis.
I strongly suggest that if you get accommodation that you do not include your AH in your household seeing as he has dragged you down with him and will do so again. You may have less money coming in, but at least you will be able to control it, and you will be eligible for support from him as well. Take control of the finances, whatever it takes, or you will end up in exactly the same place.

Carmie01

Thank you everyone. It's got to be the worse time of my life. I am going to go to the benefits department on Monday as I worked with my husband but I can no longer do that now. I hate having to go to the State for money, but I have little choice.

I need a miracle to sort this all out. My AH is in denial about his drinking. This site helped me last night as I went through threads about Alcoholism and read some really sad stories but also the inspirational stories and courage of the lovely people on here has given me hope.

dandylion

Carmie01--Yes, do take every bit of help and any charity that is available. This is the time to ASK for help and to accept it graciously. There is no shame and no one has the right to judge you--least of all, yourself.

This could be any one of us--from any variety of circumstances. There will come a time that you can pay it forward to others. And you will be able to do it with great compassion.

It is important--as others, here, have said to be aggressive in finding out where any and all resources are. So many times, people don't know of help that is actually available or are too timid or ashamed to ask or talk to others about it.

We never know how much courage we have--until it is the only option.

I am glad you cam here to post.

dandylion