frostedolive

My husband who has stuggled with addiction for years recently relapsed or maybe never really, actually stopped at all. He has a history with heroin and meth. Loves his beer, adores his pot and enjoys the hell out of eating pills.
After years of fighting.. I gave into his beer and gave into the pot but.. pills are something I just can not accept.
I am the daughter of an addict. I've dealt with this enough for one lifetime.
I lost my Mother to drugs.
I posted a few things and got very little feedback. Im struggling so bad as to what I should do.. He lies, he minimizes the problem and says he will quit.
I dont know what to do. If interested you can read the entire story that I wrote yesterday.
Is there hope? Does anyone actually ever recover? Do I stay and wait it out, hoping he hits bottom and acknowledges he has a problem? Do I kick him out and get a divorce? Help me. Please.

AnvilheadII

actually, you did get replies and the suggestions to seek support for yourself (Alanon, Naranon) and to focus on YOU more and him less!

earlier today you started a great thread on Step 1....did you gain any clarity out of it? are you beginning to grasp the concepts of Powerlessness and Unmanageability?

frostedolive

Yes.. and no.. I know I need to start on a journey to better myself. To break free from codependancy. But.. the answers as to do I walk away or fight this with him still is weighing so heavy on my mind.

crazybabie

You don't have to make that decision today if your safe you could start meetings and doing some reading and the answers your seeking will come.

subordinary

Frosted, I was in your shoes very recently and just wanted someone, anyone to tell me what to do. Unfortunately that's not how it works. Crazybabie's suggestion is a good one... you don't need to make a decision today, just continue to be involved here, attend a F2F meeting, read naranon or alanon literature... and you will develop your own answer.

In the mean time you can always do things to protect yourself regardless of your decision. You could start your own bank account to safeguard your money from his addiction. You could start thinking of boundaries you could set to keep you safe and sane. You could do some journaling, just to get your thoughts down on paper (journaling can be therapeutic). I found that by working on some of these things, I was able to eventually make decision regarding my addicted wife.

frostedolive

Thank you both. So much.