msmaggie

OMG. ..what do sober ppl do??? I'm lost I'm bored

Dee74

Hi Msmaggie

yeah when you've spent years when fun came from opening a bottle, it's hard to think in a different way.

Do you have any hobbies, any interests - anything you'd like to do?

here's some suggestions to start the brain juices flowing
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ething-do.html

D

msmaggie

Yea....drink it has been my life for yrs. .my friends r all drinkers my fiancé did quit w me tho

ersatzmatriarch

hey ms maggie...

welcome to SR! you'll find a lot of support and encouragement here.

i'm 20 days sober today, so i don't have a ton of info (more people will be along who do), but i'm just going to AA meetings, knocking out small chores here and there, reading (for myself and with my kids), and resting as much as possible (i'm still experiencing waves of exhaustion in early recovery.)

you'll get a lot more ideas from other posters, but i'd say do anything that keeps you busy and/or relaxed, and nothing that makes you want to feed the addiction...

kiter

I hear ya sister!
On day 3...skipping a party where all my friends will be tonight.
But I've found some solid advice and inspiration from all the great group on SR.
Check out the "airport layovers" post...
Hang in there!

msmaggie

Thanks an good luck!

hypochondriac

Welcome to SR Maggie

This might sound silly but when I quit drinking I wrote a list of things I could do which I enjoyed, which weren't drinking. It was all stuff that would take like half an hour, so it provided a useful distraction when I got cravings and just eased me into sober living without heading straight on into something obsessive. To be honest what I did mostly was read magazines (I didn't have the level of concentration to tackle anything else), go for walks, and cook elaborate dinners that took hours to prepare.

I think the feeling of boredom though is more a feeling of emptiness we get when our DOC is taken from us. Because that's what it feels like, loss. For a while anyway, until the benefits of sobriety start piling up and you realise what you are gaining

Nighthawk8820

Boredom is something you will have to be proactive in dealing with. Your life needs to change in order for sobriety to work. What did you like to do before you started drinking? Focus on a few small things, and step out of your comfort zone more and more, as you get more sure of yourself and what you are capable of.
Sobriety is more than setting the bottle down, its a way of life and changing how you currently live. Its an ongoing process that I dont think ends, but its worth it. Think of who you will be and how amazing you will feel in 1 year from now? As you change, you will find things are just easier and you get into touch with yourself, the true you. Think of some things you used to like to do, or things you have always wanted to do, but got pushed aside due to your focus being on alcohol. Then start doing them. If you are bored, its up to you to change it............no one else can do that fore you. Good luck!!!

msmaggie

I'm just so afraid of changing it's been so many years

Dee74

I think everyones afraid of change - but it got to the point I was more afraid of not changing, y'know?

I'm glad I changed my life - I'm sure you will be too - there's a lot of support here - you're not alone

D

msmaggie

I know I just feel so alone now I have to change my friends, change where I go, things I do,I quit using drugs seven years ago and that seems so much easier

Anna

It's hard, but you can do it. You don't have to change everything overnight, but you can make some small changes to start with and see if it doesn't work it.

Acheleus

I am only 17 days sober and I have been exercising a lot when I get the urge to go out and party. I have been running and walking and swimming. I have always wanted to write a novel and that is something I want to do soon. Be creative and have no fear!

iwanthealth

it helped me to enjoy the peace. i've found the serenity part of being sober very helpful.

bsmac02

Maggie - I'm in the same boat. I'm one week sober and right now all of my friends, from many different cliques, are hitting me up for parties. Asking me where I am, what I'm doing. Yesterday I ate out at a favorite Mexican restaurant and ordered a tonic with lime. Everyone looked at me like "do what?". I would consider myself, and more than likely be considered, the life of the party. Now I feel like I'm justifying myself to everyone when I really shouldn't. Yes, new friends and new "things" to do on the weekend. But there's an upside. You can change. We can change. We have a community here. I found this site just today and am loving it already. Just focus on the future and what life will be without the bottle. You'll realize your potential in a way you never thought possible. We're here for you. We can do this.

msmaggie

I know we can do it,and it's something I really want! I did take the vivitrol shot which is a 28-day shot which even if you drink you get no effects from it its just its so scary too change everything everything in your life has to change

Nuudawn

Hey Msmaggie. I hear ya. Drinking WAS my hobby. It killed boredom and made a night like tonight (where I"m home alone) bearable. Today I realized I don't have a big network of friends I can call up and say "hey, let's do something". I tried one and she was busy. I'm currently single (and I'm pretty sure that had something to do with my longtime companion..alcohol). I've been abusing alcohol a long time...and even when I did stuff..I did it with my buddy booze.

So ya..it's going to take some times to navigate sobriety and find some interests and things I enjoy. I have a new book to start....and I just made my self a fresh strawberry pineapple smoothie...but we need patience Mags... we need to get to know ourselves and what the heck we like to do ; )

msmaggie

Damn, you got that right....my best friend was beer, it just went hand in hand with everything I did....my hunny is quitting with me which is helping. ..but he's all I feel I have right now! Even being with him is different as we were always drinking....I called him tonight from work crying an he was right there for me but I'm .....I don't know wtf I am right now, besides lost

Nuudawn

Aw ..well, at least you got a honey The fact that I don't know what to do with myself motivates me even more to stay sober and figure it out. I'm divorcing that buddy...wasted years of my life...want more....what? lol..don't know..gotta figure it. I want to learn guitar, among other things, but I'm not quite a couple weeks in yet and I'm still stuck in listlessness and fatigue..like some sort of sober stupor...but this too shall pass.....

2granddaughters

I go to a lot of AA meetings maggie .. it's worked for me for almost 24 yrs. All my friends today are ex-drinkers.

All the best.

Bob R