He went to rehab today
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 10
He went to rehab today
Hi everyone,
I am feeling a little down in the dumps today. My 20 yr old boyfriend of 4 years took the initiative a few days ago to give a rehab a call to get help for his crack addiction of 2 1/2 years. He never used EVERY day, but he would have some clean time and then the drug would call his name out of the blue. You never knew when he would go back to the drug but it would always be unexpected because he would do good for a couple of weeks and then fall off track.
I am so happy that he is the one who made the decision to go and get help because he knows he needs to change or hes doomed for life pretty much. He lives with his family and they are very dysfunctional as well (they are alcoholics). In a way I kind of get why he turns to drugs because his family has so many problems that he just wants to get away from it all and cope with it by crack. I believe he is getting a 30 day treatment. He just left a couple of hours ago and it just hit me today that we are going to be away from each other for a while. We never been without each other for a week so it is definetely a new adjustment. I balled my eyes out before he left and so did he.
I feel kind of lost and sick myself, I guess because I was so dependent on him because im used to him always being there and I love him to pieces so I feel like I am going to rehab as well because right now I just feel "off". I know him going to rehab will be nothing but positive and that I can be worry free for a month but its just a change that I am not used to. I am curious at what he will be learning about in rehab and what do they talk about? What kind of treatment are they going to do for him? Is he allowed phone calls or visitation?
He tells me when he gets out he will be better then ever because he doesnt want to live like this anymore and that he needs the professionals to help him over these hurdles. He wants to be with me when he gets out and prove to me that there is hope for us. I am kind of skeptical on rehab though because my father went and he just ended up back in the same spot he started in. So I feel like the real test of if rehab worked will be when he gets out of there and comes back to reality. I guess you can say I dont really have hope in the rehab because I feel like temptation will get the best of him when he gets out.
I am just very upset and vulnerable right now and I just miss him so much. I want to be happy with him and I know its just 30 days but right now it feels like an eternity. I told him he needs to focus on himself and figure everything out while he is there and really embrace the opportunity he has been given to change.
Any advice or stories would be great at a time like this. I want to know your experiences with a loved one going to rehab and what you did to cope.
Thanks all
I am feeling a little down in the dumps today. My 20 yr old boyfriend of 4 years took the initiative a few days ago to give a rehab a call to get help for his crack addiction of 2 1/2 years. He never used EVERY day, but he would have some clean time and then the drug would call his name out of the blue. You never knew when he would go back to the drug but it would always be unexpected because he would do good for a couple of weeks and then fall off track.
I am so happy that he is the one who made the decision to go and get help because he knows he needs to change or hes doomed for life pretty much. He lives with his family and they are very dysfunctional as well (they are alcoholics). In a way I kind of get why he turns to drugs because his family has so many problems that he just wants to get away from it all and cope with it by crack. I believe he is getting a 30 day treatment. He just left a couple of hours ago and it just hit me today that we are going to be away from each other for a while. We never been without each other for a week so it is definetely a new adjustment. I balled my eyes out before he left and so did he.
I feel kind of lost and sick myself, I guess because I was so dependent on him because im used to him always being there and I love him to pieces so I feel like I am going to rehab as well because right now I just feel "off". I know him going to rehab will be nothing but positive and that I can be worry free for a month but its just a change that I am not used to. I am curious at what he will be learning about in rehab and what do they talk about? What kind of treatment are they going to do for him? Is he allowed phone calls or visitation?
He tells me when he gets out he will be better then ever because he doesnt want to live like this anymore and that he needs the professionals to help him over these hurdles. He wants to be with me when he gets out and prove to me that there is hope for us. I am kind of skeptical on rehab though because my father went and he just ended up back in the same spot he started in. So I feel like the real test of if rehab worked will be when he gets out of there and comes back to reality. I guess you can say I dont really have hope in the rehab because I feel like temptation will get the best of him when he gets out.
I am just very upset and vulnerable right now and I just miss him so much. I want to be happy with him and I know its just 30 days but right now it feels like an eternity. I told him he needs to focus on himself and figure everything out while he is there and really embrace the opportunity he has been given to change.
Any advice or stories would be great at a time like this. I want to know your experiences with a loved one going to rehab and what you did to cope.
Thanks all
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: W Washington
Posts: 11,589
try to take things just one day at a time, or part of one day at a time. it's really REALLY good news that at his young age he not only saw he had a problem but DID something about it!!! good for him! lot of addicts refuse to get help.
even the best rehab on the planet is only as good as the addict's true desire to get clean and stay clean. if he wants it bad enough, he CAN do this. if not, well he wouldn't be the first crack addict that had to take a couple practice laps!
, we'll be here for you!
even the best rehab on the planet is only as good as the addict's true desire to get clean and stay clean. if he wants it bad enough, he CAN do this. if not, well he wouldn't be the first crack addict that had to take a couple practice laps!
, we'll be here for you!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 154
You can go to Al-anon meetings. They are for people like us with loved ones who are addicts. Try working on you for the next 30 days. I've been away from my boyfriend for going on 4 and a half months. His program has been behind bars So its good he is realizing this early. But just know addiction is a vicious cycle good luck.
I hope your bf really wants to get clean cause if he doesn't want it, rehab won't help him. Be sure to get support for yourself too.
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
He may be limited on phone calls for a while, because they really need him to stay focused on his recovery and not outside issues. Also, he may want to leave in a day or two as he goes through the emotions of withdrawing from his drug. I hope he stays, most do, but the desire to leave is common.
Maybe use this time for your own recovery, Al-anon, Nar-anon and CoDA are three similar fellowships that can help you find your balance and learn healthy ways of living.
If you get healthy while he gets healthy, you both will be much stronger as you face the future.
Hugs
Maybe use this time for your own recovery, Al-anon, Nar-anon and CoDA are three similar fellowships that can help you find your balance and learn healthy ways of living.
If you get healthy while he gets healthy, you both will be much stronger as you face the future.
Hugs
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