Wing

Hi, I'm still in my holiday trip... Very tired of hiking and walking around... But there are still some moment that I miss him a lot and tempted to msg him. Esp in the morning when I wake up. I found that I must leave the bed once I get up, otherwise I just keep thinking of him in bed... Esp because I dream of him sometimes.

Counselor said that I have to take this period to manage my thought and feeling during this period... I guess that my brain and my mind are working on this by themselves.

Sometimes, I missed the good time a lot and think 'what if I didn't control him from being out with junkie frens, what if I chilled as he told me'...
Sometimes, I got my mind clear that he had never changed. He was just saying but the action told another story... I found out my calendar in phone. I was used to mark the nite when I found the cocaine evidence at his home, when he called the dealer in front of me and when he was drunk with his drunkie flatmate and gave me hard time... That's really frequent! And we fight twice a month for that... How could I became numb and started to accept these as he told me to... I stopped counting these since Dec, I was subconsciously trying to accept and believe that he 'used recreationally'

My brain & mind are managing all the memories and feelings now... I guess that I just need to hang in there...

'Hugs'

Sunshine2

Missing your loved one is similar to an addict missing drugs. In recovery with NA, e.g. they will take one day at a time. It works similar for us. Just don't contact him for today. If you do that every day, before you know it you will not miss him anywhere near as much and eventually you will find you do not think about him for days, then weeks, then hardly at all.

It is hard in the beginning, but it does get easier.

shinebright7

I wrote letters to my hubby in my journal when we were not talking.

zoso77

I don't miss my AXGF. Why?

I was willing to tolerate a lot of the up's and down's associated with her "recovery", but I was quite direct when I told her I would not tolerate her being unfaithful to me. And when she left me for another addict and confessed how often she was unfaithful to me, I was done. I looked back at her behavior, how manipulative it was, how dishonest she was, and I decided that I simply didn't want someone like that in my life anymore. It was that simple.

I guess, for me, I wasn't going to pine for someone that was duplictous and unapologetically unfaithful. Good riddance.

ZoSo

atalose

Hang in there!!! it does get better.

Instead of focusing on all the resons why you miss him, why not write down all the horriable things he did or said to you during the time you were with him. That way when your mind starts to pine for him pull out the list and remind yourself each and every day why he is not in your life anymore...