Dating an addict in recovery
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 4
Dating an addict in recovery
*I apologize for the length but I'd like for someone to know my story before offering advice/support. Please take the time to read, thank you very much!*
I'm 23 and have been dating my addict boyfriend for 4 months, unofficially a little longer than that. I've known him for much longer though and feel I do know him completely, and love him, taking the good with the bad. In the beginning of our relationship it was very "fairy-tail", I couldn't have been happier. I know that he previously had a problem with heroin and was an injection user, but that he had been clean for a while before we began dating. We were living together and it eventually became obvious to me that he began using again, which he admitted. I thought it would stop, but I quickly learned of the ugly downward spiral that his life was taking. Pawning his families things, stealing my car in the middle of the night to buy drugs, etc. Regardless of this behavior, I know he struggled to treat me well and hide his addiction and it was a very sad thing to watch. Eventually he admitted to needing help and went to rehab for about a month, which was a really great program and I attended the family week near the end. It made a big a difference and he is now in his recovery, although he relapsed once since returning home. However, he got a sponsor, attends NA meetings everyday and is planning on moving into an Oxford House for 6 months soon.
Now in terms of where we are CURRENTLY at: I am grateful for the effort he is putting forth and the progress that is obvious. However, I know this is difficult for him and there is a drastic change in his behavior towards me. He is moody, unmotivated, and shuts himself off from me. He will apologize but it's so reoccurring that I don't know how to handle this anymore. I do believe he loves me, and I love him dearly but I guess my question is how do we save our relationship while still making sure that his sobriety comes first? I don't want to interfere because I know that is priority. How can we get back on a healthy track? I believe completely that it is possible to still have a functioning, fulfilling relationship throughout his recovery which I am willing to work towards and so is he, but what are some steps that we could take? Any advice would be much appreciated, thank you for taking the time to read this!
I'm 23 and have been dating my addict boyfriend for 4 months, unofficially a little longer than that. I've known him for much longer though and feel I do know him completely, and love him, taking the good with the bad. In the beginning of our relationship it was very "fairy-tail", I couldn't have been happier. I know that he previously had a problem with heroin and was an injection user, but that he had been clean for a while before we began dating. We were living together and it eventually became obvious to me that he began using again, which he admitted. I thought it would stop, but I quickly learned of the ugly downward spiral that his life was taking. Pawning his families things, stealing my car in the middle of the night to buy drugs, etc. Regardless of this behavior, I know he struggled to treat me well and hide his addiction and it was a very sad thing to watch. Eventually he admitted to needing help and went to rehab for about a month, which was a really great program and I attended the family week near the end. It made a big a difference and he is now in his recovery, although he relapsed once since returning home. However, he got a sponsor, attends NA meetings everyday and is planning on moving into an Oxford House for 6 months soon.
Now in terms of where we are CURRENTLY at: I am grateful for the effort he is putting forth and the progress that is obvious. However, I know this is difficult for him and there is a drastic change in his behavior towards me. He is moody, unmotivated, and shuts himself off from me. He will apologize but it's so reoccurring that I don't know how to handle this anymore. I do believe he loves me, and I love him dearly but I guess my question is how do we save our relationship while still making sure that his sobriety comes first? I don't want to interfere because I know that is priority. How can we get back on a healthy track? I believe completely that it is possible to still have a functioning, fulfilling relationship throughout his recovery which I am willing to work towards and so is he, but what are some steps that we could take? Any advice would be much appreciated, thank you for taking the time to read this!
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
