go to sleep!
box of chocolates
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,013
go to sleep!
Im using him, I dont love him, I dont respect him, im going to leave him anyways,
Im not wifey (w.e that means) im a b, im stupid, im just like everyone else,
I dont do anything, I complain all the time, im crazy
His words today. Boy I must be psychotic lol (finding some humor in his bs)
All day quack quack quack...he got off this am and was falling asleep
Repeatedly ...so much spilling his drink on himself.
I try not to engage and even go take a bath to get away.
Nope he actually followed me....now its less quack more bark.
Telling me all the above and hes going to take himself to jail and make me "happy"
So I get out of the bath and hes gone. He left. Dont know where
And frankly even though it worrys me...
That was his dumb*** choice. Im not his keeper. So I dont know where he went.
Maybe a bar or friends since he had plenty of liquor here plus cigarettes.
Im just beating my own head for doing this to myself.
Our money has yet to come in like wede hoped to get into an outpatient
Still I dont deserve this kind of stress and really everytime he has a few days off from work...
Its like he picks fights so he can leave and do what he wants.
I dont deserve that either and yes hes talked about outpatient. Just the other day again but
How unfair to have to wait for change. So I think im going leave for a family members until I see change.
Im not wifey (w.e that means) im a b, im stupid, im just like everyone else,
I dont do anything, I complain all the time, im crazy
His words today. Boy I must be psychotic lol (finding some humor in his bs)
All day quack quack quack...he got off this am and was falling asleep
Repeatedly ...so much spilling his drink on himself.
I try not to engage and even go take a bath to get away.
Nope he actually followed me....now its less quack more bark.
Telling me all the above and hes going to take himself to jail and make me "happy"
So I get out of the bath and hes gone. He left. Dont know where
And frankly even though it worrys me...
That was his dumb*** choice. Im not his keeper. So I dont know where he went.
Maybe a bar or friends since he had plenty of liquor here plus cigarettes.
Im just beating my own head for doing this to myself.
Our money has yet to come in like wede hoped to get into an outpatient
Still I dont deserve this kind of stress and really everytime he has a few days off from work...
Its like he picks fights so he can leave and do what he wants.
I dont deserve that either and yes hes talked about outpatient. Just the other day again but
How unfair to have to wait for change. So I think im going leave for a family members until I see change.
I'm no angel!
Join Date: May 2005
Location: tampa, fl
Posts: 6,728
"Its like he picks fights so he can leave and do what he wants."
He probably does, my exabf did, as does my mother, the main alkie in my life. It is amazing what she can direct to get her way. She is 87, and her ability to manipulate others still amazes me. I am no contact with her for the third time in my adult life, once for 10 years, the happiest years of my life...I am on that path again, I see the peace and happiness in my grasp.
No one should have to live as you do. Life is too short, believe me, I blinked and I am 65 years old, I ask myself... WTH happened?
Do what is best for you and your children, if he wants recovery, he will find it...whether you are there or not. Honestly, I do not believe that he he will go to out or in patient recovery after the raise comes in and if he did... by some fluke, I don't think that he will stick with a recovery program...just my gut doing the talking.
Sending support your way.
He probably does, my exabf did, as does my mother, the main alkie in my life. It is amazing what she can direct to get her way. She is 87, and her ability to manipulate others still amazes me. I am no contact with her for the third time in my adult life, once for 10 years, the happiest years of my life...I am on that path again, I see the peace and happiness in my grasp.
No one should have to live as you do. Life is too short, believe me, I blinked and I am 65 years old, I ask myself... WTH happened?
Do what is best for you and your children, if he wants recovery, he will find it...whether you are there or not. Honestly, I do not believe that he he will go to out or in patient recovery after the raise comes in and if he did... by some fluke, I don't think that he will stick with a recovery program...just my gut doing the talking.
Sending support your way.
box of chocolates
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,013
Thanks.
Dollydoo- I hope your gut feelimg is wrong but I think we all have become so familiar with these
Stories and our own we know deep down that the there is a great possibility they dont get help. Sad I know.
I hope for the best still as you pointed out life is precious and I cant see myself wasting all my youth years ...or too much time on the same thing. The same sad stressful thing and it is sooooo stressful!
Katiekate-
Yup! One of the many things I think in my head when he acts that way.
Im a b ? Yet you are whining like one . Im crazy? But you dont even know what day it is. I complain? Uet thats all you did today. Lol. Oh I wish I could nail into him but wjat good that woul do.
He did come back quacked some more and finally (once again and hopefully for the rest of the night) fell asleep on the couch.
Dollydoo- I hope your gut feelimg is wrong but I think we all have become so familiar with these
Stories and our own we know deep down that the there is a great possibility they dont get help. Sad I know.
I hope for the best still as you pointed out life is precious and I cant see myself wasting all my youth years ...or too much time on the same thing. The same sad stressful thing and it is sooooo stressful!
Katiekate-
Yup! One of the many things I think in my head when he acts that way.
Im a b ? Yet you are whining like one . Im crazy? But you dont even know what day it is. I complain? Uet thats all you did today. Lol. Oh I wish I could nail into him but wjat good that woul do.
He did come back quacked some more and finally (once again and hopefully for the rest of the night) fell asleep on the couch.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 1,407
Oh Lordy...your story is so familiar to me. My ABF would say all the same things, he needed to pick some stupid fight in order to have an excuse to leave and go drink. Good for you for taking a bath instead of engaging in the ridiculous war of words.
If he truly wants sobriety, he doesn't have to wait until he can go to an out patient program. He can find an AA group and start today. In the meantime, you don't have to accept the verbal abuse. Or wait for a change. You can't change him, but you can change what you do for yourself. Hugs to you.
If he truly wants sobriety, he doesn't have to wait until he can go to an out patient program. He can find an AA group and start today. In the meantime, you don't have to accept the verbal abuse. Or wait for a change. You can't change him, but you can change what you do for yourself. Hugs to you.
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