Time to get my life back (Suboxone detox)
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Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 1
Time to get my life back (Suboxone detox)
At the age of 14, I started abusing opiods. I moved up the ranks from lortabs, to heroin. Eventually I got hooked on street methadone, and the detox was so horrendous I got on suboxone.
After getting on suboxone, I started a new life. I finished high school, made close (sober) friends, and got a job. Now I've spent the last few months trying to get off this stuff. I just made it to day 10 of detox, but I had a relapse. I used a quarter gram of heroin, and half a miligram of suboxone.
To put it in a diet metaphor, I ate a couple brownies, but I don't want to finish the pan. I'm getting back on the sober train now. I'm making this thread to share my detox story, and to receive help from others on my way back to sobriety.
This time, there isn't an element to surprise, because I'm familiar with the detox. I'm going to go to meetings, stay busy, look for a new job, keep in contact with friends, and generally just put all my strength into making it to sobriety. I'm completely powerless over these drugs, but I made it 10 days without them, I can do it again. I'm getting sober for ME now, not my dad, mom, siblings, or friends.
The symptoms I experienced were MILD compared to full agonist withdrawal. Sweats, mild body aches, insomnia (no where near as bad as methadone), boredom, slight restlessness, etc.
I'm humbly asking for help and support through this transition phase.
After getting on suboxone, I started a new life. I finished high school, made close (sober) friends, and got a job. Now I've spent the last few months trying to get off this stuff. I just made it to day 10 of detox, but I had a relapse. I used a quarter gram of heroin, and half a miligram of suboxone.
To put it in a diet metaphor, I ate a couple brownies, but I don't want to finish the pan. I'm getting back on the sober train now. I'm making this thread to share my detox story, and to receive help from others on my way back to sobriety.
This time, there isn't an element to surprise, because I'm familiar with the detox. I'm going to go to meetings, stay busy, look for a new job, keep in contact with friends, and generally just put all my strength into making it to sobriety. I'm completely powerless over these drugs, but I made it 10 days without them, I can do it again. I'm getting sober for ME now, not my dad, mom, siblings, or friends.
The symptoms I experienced were MILD compared to full agonist withdrawal. Sweats, mild body aches, insomnia (no where near as bad as methadone), boredom, slight restlessness, etc.
I'm humbly asking for help and support through this transition phase.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 2
Day 1
HEY! This kind of stuff can get drawn out forever, so, I'll make it simple:
I'm a 5 star, level 10 drug addict. I real winner
I got sober about 3 years ago, and stayed that way for 15 months. No suboxone, no weed, no drinking, no nothin'! Anyways, I figured I was cured and could drink again, permitting that I stayed away from drugs. So, I took a drink- Jack Daniels and Coca-Cola. 3 days later I was back to IV Opiates. After several months, I was hanging on to my job by a thread. Long before that I had tried suboxone on 3different occassions- All of them I failed, but, I was never this serious.
I started on Suboxone again 15 months ago. Actually, 15 months and 4 days to be exact. In this time, I've refrained from using all other drugs, even alcohol.
The beginning was great, my life came back instantly. I succeeded greatly in business, financially, and in improving strained relationships.
About 3 months ago, right at the year mark, I began asking my doctor "how much longer?". I truly had'nt tried very hard to make any significant changes in my dosage- I just thought the day would come when I had been "sober long enough" that I could simply quit taking it. Stupid me.
To tell you the truth, I actually went up in dosage from when I started. The doctor started me at 16mg a day, but I was only taking about 4(mg). Eventually, I got comfortable with the whole deal and went up to 8(mg). Then, towards the last few months, I went to 6mg, 4mg, and then 3mg. I woud, however, work my way back up again to about 4 or 5 mg's. The doctor had asked me to go down to 2mg, so we could get to 2mg every other day shortly after. I'd regreted asking him to push me, because this step, sucked.
On 2mg a day, I'd actually get a little wacked out- Pretty damn sick, no concentration, no energy, etc. So I figured, "Why in the hell would I draw this out? Feel like **** every step I took (4mg to 2mg, to 2mg every other day, etc.), just to feel like **** in the end, the day I stopped taking it?"
So, my doctor put me on 2mg, and I agreed. The first month I continued taking 3 mg, ran out a little early, and made up an excuse about why I scheduled my appointment early. I made the excuse of having a wedding to attend this month, and having to finish some online classes, as to why I couldn't go to 2mg every other day, so, he wrote me another 2mg script for this month. This was the time that my gameplan made the more sense than ever! I started taking 4mg, because hell, I deserved to feel better than I had been I only made it about 2 weeks. So, we're neering the end of my days here.
Crap, I told you'd I'd keep it simple! Okay, so, I ran out. I was going to use this time to quit anyway, however, I wanted a few strips to fall back on in an emergency. I tried calling the front office, and leaving 2 voicemails on the doctors answering maching twice. No luck, no returned calls. So, we're going to do it live.
TODAY IS DAY ONE. I took my last dose yesterday- 1.5mg in the morning, 1.5mg after work, 4 mg at 9:00pm. I'M 16 HOURS IN.
I'm a 5 star, level 10 drug addict. I real winner
I got sober about 3 years ago, and stayed that way for 15 months. No suboxone, no weed, no drinking, no nothin'! Anyways, I figured I was cured and could drink again, permitting that I stayed away from drugs. So, I took a drink- Jack Daniels and Coca-Cola. 3 days later I was back to IV Opiates. After several months, I was hanging on to my job by a thread. Long before that I had tried suboxone on 3different occassions- All of them I failed, but, I was never this serious. I started on Suboxone again 15 months ago. Actually, 15 months and 4 days to be exact. In this time, I've refrained from using all other drugs, even alcohol.
The beginning was great, my life came back instantly. I succeeded greatly in business, financially, and in improving strained relationships.
About 3 months ago, right at the year mark, I began asking my doctor "how much longer?". I truly had'nt tried very hard to make any significant changes in my dosage- I just thought the day would come when I had been "sober long enough" that I could simply quit taking it. Stupid me.
To tell you the truth, I actually went up in dosage from when I started. The doctor started me at 16mg a day, but I was only taking about 4(mg). Eventually, I got comfortable with the whole deal and went up to 8(mg). Then, towards the last few months, I went to 6mg, 4mg, and then 3mg. I woud, however, work my way back up again to about 4 or 5 mg's. The doctor had asked me to go down to 2mg, so we could get to 2mg every other day shortly after. I'd regreted asking him to push me, because this step, sucked.
On 2mg a day, I'd actually get a little wacked out- Pretty damn sick, no concentration, no energy, etc. So I figured, "Why in the hell would I draw this out? Feel like **** every step I took (4mg to 2mg, to 2mg every other day, etc.), just to feel like **** in the end, the day I stopped taking it?"
So, my doctor put me on 2mg, and I agreed. The first month I continued taking 3 mg, ran out a little early, and made up an excuse about why I scheduled my appointment early. I made the excuse of having a wedding to attend this month, and having to finish some online classes, as to why I couldn't go to 2mg every other day, so, he wrote me another 2mg script for this month. This was the time that my gameplan made the more sense than ever! I started taking 4mg, because hell, I deserved to feel better than I had been
I only made it about 2 weeks. So, we're neering the end of my days here.Crap, I told you'd I'd keep it simple! Okay, so, I ran out. I was going to use this time to quit anyway, however, I wanted a few strips to fall back on in an emergency. I tried calling the front office, and leaving 2 voicemails on the doctors answering maching twice. No luck, no returned calls. So, we're going to do it live.
TODAY IS DAY ONE. I took my last dose yesterday- 1.5mg in the morning, 1.5mg after work, 4 mg at 9:00pm. I'M 16 HOURS IN.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: salt Lake city
Posts: 3
Is it safer/better to be on Suboxone long term or short. Say years vs a few weeks-a month or two?
I have read horror stories of long term use only to be in same boat being dependent and sick. I am just so lost and I am using my subs when I can't get pain meds. I feel trapped. Want to stop but so so scared. Withdrawl scares me, but I am scared to be without my drugs. I don't know where to go. I go to ca/aa meetings. But it is all a front. I am lost. i cant even stop for a day or two. What is wrong with me. God help me. i don't wanna die yet. I. I don't know what to do.
I have read horror stories of long term use only to be in same boat being dependent and sick. I am just so lost and I am using my subs when I can't get pain meds. I feel trapped. Want to stop but so so scared. Withdrawl scares me, but I am scared to be without my drugs. I don't know where to go. I go to ca/aa meetings. But it is all a front. I am lost. i cant even stop for a day or two. What is wrong with me. God help me. i don't wanna die yet. I. I don't know what to do.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 2
End of Day 1 / Day 2 / Day 3
HEY GUYS!
I missed posting yesterday. I don't have the internet at my house, so, I have to come into work (my office). Praise the lord that I don't work the weekends! Cuban, you're stressing me out! Haha. Listen, I'm hard wired, and love my energy. The thought of going a day without my Suboxone was (and still is NUTS). But I'm on day 3, and it's too late to turn back now.
THE END OF DAY 1 was strait up, ******. Most people say that the don't get hit until day 2 or 3, but like I said, I'm a doper, through and through. I need something! I had nothing to fall back on, and, was horrified when my withdrawal symptoms started picking up. I'd like to correct my night before posting by saying I had 1mg on my last dose, giving me 4mg total for the day (my average). I was fading on Day 1 quickly, and, I actually scored 2 films (8mg each) around 9:00pm, 24 hours in. I didn't touch them, but the thought of being able to tap out, throuw in the towel, surrender, etc., if I wanted to eased my mind. I had stocked up on supplies, which I believe helped me greatly.
BEFORE I GO TO DAY 2, this is what I have: Trazadone for sleep, Vistiril to calm my crawling skin, and creatine to take along with lots of water. To eat, I have cereal, bananas, milk, bottled water and Powrade. I've also started taking B12, Vitamin C, and a Multi-Vitamin.
DAY 2 was more physical than Day 1, yet, I was a little stronger mentally. It was Saturday, so, no work. I made it out of the house twice- Once to try my best to jog, which was quite good. It helped me feel better despite me being EXHAUSTED. I slept like ****, but with the Trazadone, I actually managed to get about 5 hours off and on. I went over to my Parents house to watch the last 10 minutes of a football game. Let me remind you, I had NO ENERGY. So, I bought a coffee from McDonalds. BIG MISTAKE. That thing gave me goose bumps, made me yawn, then my skin started to crawl, and I had some minor jolts of unintentional body movements. One of the band members of the opposing team started to cry when our team whooped theirs, and, despite being happy, the sight of seeing her cry made my have to try like hell to fight my own tears back. I made it home after the game, took a hot shower, took 1 vistiril and 1 trazadone, and got some better sleep than I thought I would.
TODAY IS DAY 3. I have a few minutes out of every few hours where I feel like normal. Before I know it, the withdrawals come back and slap the hell out of me. I've spent the last few days in bed. The thought of returning to work tomorrow, sitting at this desk, makes me even sicker (I know that's not a word, but, I don't care right now, lol). I'm hungry, but don't have the energy to put food in my mouth. Tonight feels like sleep may be a little harder to come by. I've smoked several cigarettes, but, don't know why- They actually make me feel worse.
I KNOW THIS ALL SEEMS HORRIBLE, but, put in your earphones, play some sweet music, and masturbate as aften as you can. That may sound crazy, even mentioning it I feel crazy, but, it really works magic. I'm going to make it. 9:00pm tonight will actually still only be day 3, but I will have passed the 72 hour mark, and be starting Day 4. I'll still have to fight off the night, though. I'm looking at it like this- If you have cancer, you need treatment to cook out the cancer, if you have Hepatitis, you need treatment to cook out the discease. We have problems with addiction, and we'll have to cook out the demons that have plagued us. LET'S GO!
*Sorry if there's things spelled incorrectly, I'm way to tired to proof read.
I missed posting yesterday. I don't have the internet at my house, so, I have to come into work (my office). Praise the lord that I don't work the weekends! Cuban, you're stressing me out! Haha. Listen, I'm hard wired, and love my energy. The thought of going a day without my Suboxone was (and still is NUTS). But I'm on day 3, and it's too late to turn back now.
THE END OF DAY 1 was strait up, ******. Most people say that the don't get hit until day 2 or 3, but like I said, I'm a doper, through and through. I need something! I had nothing to fall back on, and, was horrified when my withdrawal symptoms started picking up. I'd like to correct my night before posting by saying I had 1mg on my last dose, giving me 4mg total for the day (my average). I was fading on Day 1 quickly, and, I actually scored 2 films (8mg each) around 9:00pm, 24 hours in. I didn't touch them, but the thought of being able to tap out, throuw in the towel, surrender, etc., if I wanted to eased my mind. I had stocked up on supplies, which I believe helped me greatly.
BEFORE I GO TO DAY 2, this is what I have: Trazadone for sleep, Vistiril to calm my crawling skin, and creatine to take along with lots of water. To eat, I have cereal, bananas, milk, bottled water and Powrade. I've also started taking B12, Vitamin C, and a Multi-Vitamin.
DAY 2 was more physical than Day 1, yet, I was a little stronger mentally. It was Saturday, so, no work. I made it out of the house twice- Once to try my best to jog, which was quite good. It helped me feel better despite me being EXHAUSTED. I slept like ****, but with the Trazadone, I actually managed to get about 5 hours off and on. I went over to my Parents house to watch the last 10 minutes of a football game. Let me remind you, I had NO ENERGY. So, I bought a coffee from McDonalds. BIG MISTAKE. That thing gave me goose bumps, made me yawn, then my skin started to crawl, and I had some minor jolts of unintentional body movements. One of the band members of the opposing team started to cry when our team whooped theirs, and, despite being happy, the sight of seeing her cry made my have to try like hell to fight my own tears back. I made it home after the game, took a hot shower, took 1 vistiril and 1 trazadone, and got some better sleep than I thought I would.
TODAY IS DAY 3. I have a few minutes out of every few hours where I feel like normal. Before I know it, the withdrawals come back and slap the hell out of me. I've spent the last few days in bed. The thought of returning to work tomorrow, sitting at this desk, makes me even sicker (I know that's not a word, but, I don't care right now, lol). I'm hungry, but don't have the energy to put food in my mouth. Tonight feels like sleep may be a little harder to come by. I've smoked several cigarettes, but, don't know why- They actually make me feel worse.
I KNOW THIS ALL SEEMS HORRIBLE, but, put in your earphones, play some sweet music, and masturbate as aften as you can. That may sound crazy, even mentioning it I feel crazy, but, it really works magic. I'm going to make it. 9:00pm tonight will actually still only be day 3, but I will have passed the 72 hour mark, and be starting Day 4. I'll still have to fight off the night, though. I'm looking at it like this- If you have cancer, you need treatment to cook out the cancer, if you have Hepatitis, you need treatment to cook out the discease. We have problems with addiction, and we'll have to cook out the demons that have plagued us. LET'S GO!
*Sorry if there's things spelled incorrectly, I'm way to tired to proof read.
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